The Future Haunts Your Past
by theopallover
Summary: A 16 year old lonely and depressed Severus Snape travels to the future and meets the beautiful and dazzling Hermione Granger. The two eventually fall in love- but soon the dangers of time-travelling catch up with the young Severus Snape, which creates devastating consequences for him, his relationship and the entire Wizarding World. snamione/snager
1. The Time-Turner

**Chapter One: The Time-Turner**

* * *

 _(Early March, 1976)_

Severus Snape slammed the wooden door of the girl's lavatory behind him and slid down the marble walls onto the floor. He angrily rubbed his eyes, trying to wipe away the oncoming tears that were threatening to spill down his cheeks. Try as he could, he could not help crying–it was the only way he could cope with the emotional and physical pain he had to endure every single day.

He got up to look at the mirror and examine the damage done to his left jaw, which he could feel pounding angrily as if punishing him for not fighting back, hurting him for not protecting himself.

 _As if I need any more pain_ , he thought as he traced his fingertips along the purple bruises.

The physical evidence didn't matter, with his extensive knowledge of potions he could easily concoct the _Bruise-fading_ potion but it was the emotional pain that stained his entire being, that marked his soul with a coal-black hatred and animosity of everybody around him.

It was lucky for Severus Snape that no girl ever came into the girl's lavatory, which made it the perfect place for him to hide and think. Of course, Moaning Myrtle was always there, however she knew better than to disturb him. She'd learnt that lesson the very day they first met.

Severus Snape had burst through the doors crying as a first year, with blood dripping down his nose.

 _"Ooh, what happened to you?"_ Myrtle had asked, much to the shock of Severus.

He fell backwards, frantically looking around to see where the voice was coming from.

 _"I'm up here, silly!"_ She sang, and he looked up at her, bewildered.

"Who are you?" He asked, half-embarrassed that someone was seeing him in his current state, and half-amazed that there was a ghost right in front of him. Of course this was not the first ghost he had ever seen, he too had been greeted by Nearly-Headless-Nick on his first day at Hogwarts, but he had never seen a ghost who looked like a child before. Her skin was pallid and her eyes were the darkest of blacks; it made him feel very uneasy.

 _"I am Myrtle Elizabeth Warren. Now don't go calling me 'Moaning Myrtle' like those girls do. Haven't seen them in a while, actually."_

Severus gulped and took a step back.

 _"Why is your nose bleeding?"_ Myrtle giggled, pointing to the drops of blood that dotted his school robes.

Severus suddenly remembered why he had come here in the first place and ran to the toilets for some toilet paper.

 _"You don't talk much, do you?"_ Myrtle noted as he held the scrunched tissue to his nose.

Severus eventually shoved some toilet paper in his nose to stop the flow when his arm grew tired of holding up the tissue. He turned to Myrtle who had begun inspecting one of the toilets.

"They beat me up."

Myrtle turned around in astonishment, the weird boy was talking to her?

"I just came in here for some peace."

Myrtle pondered for a bit, wondering what to say, if she should say anything at all.

 _"I know what it's like. To be bullied_." She admitted, floating to the window located at the top of the lavatory.

 _"Of course, they never hit me."_ She peered down at Severus, looking at his bruised eye.

 _"But they made fun of me. Called me names. And when I died, they didn't even care. Took them hours to find me."_

Her face contorted in sadness at the memory as she relived the day of her death in her mind.

"I'm sorry." Snape said lamely, he couldn't think of anything else to say. Although he felt pity for the girl, he had experienced worse than her in his opinion, physically at least.

"I'll leave you be. But if you ever need anyone, I'm here." She told him, before floating through the door.

From that day on Myrtle left Severus to his own company in the lavatory, knowing he wanted to be alone. Sometimes, though seldom, they would talk about their lives, and he confided with her about how he felt like Lily, his only friend, his only _other_ friend he corrected when Myrtle gave him a look, was drifting away from him. He would tell her about how she fit in easily; everyone liked her. Later on as he grew older, he confessed his feelings for her, although Myrtle had long suspected it to be the case. And now here he was, in his fifth year, still coming back with a bloody nose, bruised face, and even broken bones.

Myrtle was about to float off into the corridor to find the prefects bathroom, a place she liked to go to sometimes when Severus wanted to be on his own.

"Wait, Myrtle!" Severus called out.

Myrtle smiled to herself before she turned around to face Severus, overjoyed that today was one of those days where Severus wanted to talk with her. She felt too lonely nowadays, and it was always nice to have someone to talk to.

"He keeps talking about her. It makes me really mad, I'm scared I'm gonna say something and—"

"Fight back, you mean? Look Severus, I know you don't want to make it worse or anything but if he's saying things about Lily, then..."

"He's not saying anything bad about her."

"Then what's he saying?"

"Well... that he wants to go out with her and stuff."

"Oh."

"I know it's not like he's doing anything wrong but—"

"You like her, I know. Look, all I'm saying is that if you stood up for yourself maybe he would stop."

"It's not that simple. It's not just him. It's his gang. Sirius, Remus and the lot of them. And I do get them back sometimes. If James hex's me, I sure as hell hex him back!" Severus argued.

" _Hexing_ is one thing but actually telling them to stop is another. Besides, you can't only fight back when it's one-on-one. When they're together, you don't even try! Do you want to carry on like this? With your jaw looking like Nancy Turnbull's hair?"

They both started laughing which temporarily broke the ever-growing tension that had begun to sneak its way into the girl's lavatory; Nancy was a girl in Severus' year and she had eaten some hair-colour changing toffee that she had got as a Valentine's Day gift from Samuel Phillip. She didn't know of the toffee's colouring powers however, and she was also unaware that the toffee had gone off, a long time ago. Her hair had turned a dark purple, and she couldn't get the colour out.

"I'm just scared, Myrtle." Severus confessed, embarrassed.

Myrtle gave him a pitiful smile and floated towards the door. "The next time I see you, hopefully you won't be sporting bruises."

 _I could always do the_ Bruise-fading _potion before I come in here_ , thought Severus before he realised he was just trying to stop himself from actually standing up for himself. But he was tired of always having to deal with this internal conflict. Sometimes he wished he could just skip to the future, where he'd be 30 years old, a successful wizard known for their extraordinary gifts in spell-making. Maybe he would work in the ministry. His brow creased as he remembered Potter's dad worked there. Maybe not then. Maybe he could be a dark wizard. After all, his talents were rare and could be useful. He sat there, dubious. At least as a Death-Eater he would have respect. He would have power. Maybe then Lily would finally notice that he was more than some loser with long greasy hair and that he had more to offer.

But he had to see. See what his future was like. If it was even worth living. Severus pulled the blood-stained tissue out of his nose and headed out the door, to the library.

 _The Triwizard Tournament: A Recount from the Winners, The Wondrous Effects of Love Potion, Teacher's Guide to Teaching Herbology._ Severus ran his finger along the books of the bookshelf as he tried to find anything about Time-Turners.

 _ **Time-Turners: Where to get one and how to use them.**_

 _Finally,_ Severus thought. Carrying the book with him he sat down in one of the many free tables, unusual for the normally busy library, and began to read.


	2. Dumbledore's Army

**Chapter Two: Dumbledore's Army**

* * *

 _(Early March, 1996)_

"Could you help me, Harry?" Cho asked timidly, when Harry had finished explaining how to cast a Patronus charm.

Hermione watched them and smiled, knowing fully well that Harry liked Cho and she was pretty certain the feelings were mutual. It certainly seemed it as she looked at Cho blushing when Harry held her hand in his own, demonstrating how to cast the Patronus charm.

Hermione turned to look at her watch, and was sad to see that they only had a few minutes left. She loved being part of Dumbledore's Army, loved going to the meetings and especially loved proving herself, particularly the time when she made Ron blast to the other side of the room. Of course she knew the risk she was taking, the risk everyone who was part of DA was taking but she knew that it was very much needed- it wasn't as if Umbridge was going to teach her any useful defence spells, let alone practise them.

Hermione walked over to Harry, and although she hated to intrude into their conversation, patted his shoulder.

"What is it?" Harry asked. An onlooker would have thought his manner was perfectly normal, but Hermione could tell he was very much annoyed at her interference as it had meant that Cho had left and walked to the other side of the room to talk to Ginny.

"Sorry," Hermione apologised, "but I thought I'd let you know that we've only got a minute left."

Harry looked at his own watch and groaned.

"I'll tell them." Hermione told him. "Now you can go talk to her." She smiled, and he grinned back.

"Alright guys." Hermione started. "We have to pack up now. Make sure you check your coins to see when the next meeting will be held."

Hermione then picked up her school bag and started making her way out of the Room of Requirement and towards the library so she could finish her Potions homework that Snape had set that morning.

" _Four pages on the exact brewing and preparation of the_ Calming Draught _."_ He had said in his dull, monotone voice.

Although Hermione didn't hate Snape nearly as much as both Harry and Ron and arguably all Gryffindor's did, she still thoroughly disliked him and the way he treated students. He petrified Neville in every lesson for Dumbledore's sake! And he always seemed to look down at her, like she was so irrelevant that even looking at her was a waste of time. In his opinion, she was just an insufferable know-it-all. Not that she cared.

Hermione shook her head from her thoughts and continued walking to the library when all of a sudden she crashed into a large, tall figure.

"Ow!" Hermione yelled as she fell to the floor, with all her schoolbooks along with her. She looked up into the eyes of a very angry Professor Snape.

"As hard as it may be for you to actually look where you walk, Miss Granger, I trust that you possess the rare ability to not crash into teachers whenever you walk out of your dormitory?" He sneered.

Hermione scowled at him before he yelled, "Now get out of my way!"

Furious, she watched as he walked away, the back of his cape flying upwards with every large step he took. It made him appear very bat-like indeed.

Hermione spent the next few minutes collecting her books strewn all over the floor, and pondering what on earth must have happened to Snape for him to turn out so horrible. She had brought the subject up once with Harry and Ron who had replied that they thought he "had always been a git" and that there was no particular reason for it. But Hermione had always disagreed, for no-one could be that spiteful just for the fun of it.

It made her think of the first Potions lesson she had ever had, where Harry had failed to answer Snape's questions, much to the Professor's amusement.

" _Ah, Mr Potter. Our new celebrity." Professor Snape said mockingly._

 _Hermione wondered why her new Potion's professor was making fun of Harry; he_ was _a celebrity- he had survived the Killing Curse! From You-Know-Who, too._

" _Tell me, Mr Potter, what would I get if I added Powdered Root of Asphodel to an infusion of Wormwood?"_

 _Hermione immediately raised her hand. It would make the Draught of Living Death, of course!_

 _She raised her hand further in the air, desperate to gain her professor's attention but he looked at her with nothing but strong disinterest and indifference._

" _You don't know? Let's try again then, shall we? Where would you look if I tell you to find me a Bezoar?"_

 _Again, Hermione raised her hand; this question was easy. The Bezoar would be found in the stomach of a goat, and it could save you from most poisons._

 _Harry stared at Snape blankly, and said, "I don't know, sir."_

 _Snape sighed and said, "Let's try one last time. What, Mr Potter, is the difference between Monkshood and Wolfsbane?"_

 _Hermione's arm once again shot up, and was once again ignored by Professor Snape._

" _Put your hand down, you stupid girl!" He snarled at her. He then turned his head to face Harry._

" _Pity, isn't it. Clearly, fame isn't everything."_

The memory left Hermione's mind as she entered the library, with all her books in hand. There was no point wasting time thinking about the past of such a horrid man.


	3. The Time-Forwarder?

**Chapter Three- The Time- _Forwarder?_**

* * *

Severus Snape was frustrated. He had finished reading the book an hour ago and yet he was still sitting in the library, utterly perplexed.

The book hadn't been very useful, to say the least. Severus had discovered that time-turners could only be accessed by the Ministry of Magic, and that hundreds upon hundreds of time-turners were located in the Time Room. Knowing that there were so many of them, and the fact that he couldn't get hold of a single one irritated Severus greatly. Until he found out that the time-turner would serve no purpose for him anyway; the device could only bring a witch or wizard _back_ in time.

 _'I mark the hours, every one,_

 _Nor have I yet outrun the Sun._

 _My use and value, unto you,_

 _Are gauged by what you have to do.'_

Severus re-read the caption under the photo of a time-turner owned by the Ministry; the words were inscribed onto the metal device.

 **'Nor have I yet outrun the sun.'**

The time-turner could not travel to a place that didn't yet exist. Well, in the reality that the time-turner's owner was in, at least.

Severus had read further on into the book which explained the dangers of time-travelling, and that _'time-travellers should note that the longest period that may be relived without the possibility of serious harm to the traveller or time itself is around five hours.'_

Of course this was all irrelevant for Severus as he wanted to go to _forward_ in time, not backwards into the past! Severus had begun to lose hope when he flipped the book around to see the back where the words ' _For more on time-turners, why not try_ ** _Time-Turners: What's in store for the future?_** _'_ were written in italics. There was a second book!

Within five seconds Severus was sat back down, this time with a larger book on the desk, which was leather-bound. He opened the book and began to read:

 _'Time-Turner's are created by casting the Hour-Reversal charm into small, enchanted hour glasses that witches and wizards wear on a chain around their neck.'- Professor Saul Croaker_

 _It has been long wondered by intellectual witches and wizards if an Hour-Speeder charm could be cast instead, to create a Time-Forwarder. This would enable a witch or wizard to travel to the future, for whatever purpose._

 _Despite being deemed 'unsafe' by the Ministry of Magic, there are constant sources stating that the Ministry itself owns no less than five Time-Forwarders, and that tests are being carried out to ensure that the devices work._

 _Professor Saul Croaker already stresses his deep concern over the use of Time-Turners, stating that, "If the Time-Turners are used incorrectly, disastrous consequences could follow." When asked on his opinion of Time-Forwarders, he completely dismissed the idea. "Time-Turners are already very unsafe for witches and wizards to be using, however if they are used properly and the rules are followed, no serious harm can be done. However, with the Time-Forwarder, this is not the case. We do not have enough knowledge to understand what will happen if one travels into the future, and how this will impact the current time. Therefore, I condemn the creation and use of such a device. And I can confirm that the British Ministry of Magic is certainly not partaking in such activities and that no Time-Forwarders are being created by anyone who is part of the Ministry."_

Severus didn't really believe this Croaker guy, whoever he was. He read on to learn about how Time-Forwarders were created, and how to use one. It worked similarly to the Time-Turner except you would turn the hour-glass forward instead of backward.

It did cross Severus' mind that it was strange that so much information was known about Time-Forwarders, and yet the Ministry of Magic had not yet admitted their possession and manufacturing of the device, however he didn't ponder it for long.

The book ended by talking about how numerous individuals were planning to travel to the future, using a Time-Forwarder, whether they were planning to steal one from the Ministry or create one themselves which was almost impossible to do. First of all, the spell for the Hour-Speeder charm was only known by the ministry and second, having the ability to cast an Hour-Speeder charm into an hour-glass required immense precision, one that not many witches and wizards possessed.

However, the book gave no information on any successful witches or wizards who had actually travelled to the future. It was hardly surprising- what were the chances that a witch or wizard would be able to steal a Time-Forwarder from the Ministry of Magic?

But then Severus thought for a second. Whoever had written the book must have been part of the Ministry; they knew how the Time-Forwarder was made and how to use one! But if they were part of the Ministry, why would they publish a book on Time-Forwarders? Everyone who was part of the Ministry shared the opinion that Time-Forwarders were nothing but trouble. And throughout the book, the author was constantly criticising the Ministry, almost blatantly calling Professor Saul Croaker a liar. Why would someone who was part of the ministry want to put a colleague in a bad light?

Severus looked for the author of the book, and yet it just said that the writer was 'Anonymous'. _No wonder,_ he thought.

Severus has never even heard of Time-Forwarders before reading the book, and his knowledge of Time-Turners was very limited. In fact, he didn't know of anyone who knew whether Time-Turners could go into the future, or how long into the past. It was almost as if the Ministry was deliberately keeping the entire Wizarding World in the dark about this topic, and no one cared to delve in deeper.

Severus decided that he would ask Professor Dumbledore if he knew anything- after all, he was a great wizard.

Severus put the book back on the bookshelf and grabbed his backpack that lay on the floor, and started walking out of the library. In the distance he could hear the sound of a group of boys talking; they weren't far off, probably walking up the stairs that led to the long corridor to the library.

 _"Hey James, why don't we go see if Snivellus feels better after your little argument? He's probably crying his eyes out!"_ A voice said, that Severus immediately recognised to be Sirius'.

His heart leapt in his chest and he panicked, looking at the currently moving stairs to see if they were coming.

 _"Poor Snivellus, he can always wipe his tears with his greasy hair. Though it probably won't help much, will it?"_ James replied, and the group of boys started laughing.

The stairs came to a halt and the boys walked off onto the corridor, where Severus was standing. He ran back into the library as quick as he could, but it was too late. James had already seen him.

 _"Oh well if it's isn't Snivellus!"_ James laughed as he walked into the library, with his gang of friends behind him.

The library was empty which meant that there was no one to distract James, Severus sadly thought. With his heart pounding, Severus went to hide behind a bookcase but he tripped in his panic, as was usually his luck.

It only took seconds for the boys to locate Severus, and they wasted no time in hurting him.

 _"Nice bruise, Snivelly."_ Sirius spat, and Severus silently cursed. He has been so preoccupied with the Time-Forwarders that he had forgotten to cast the _Bruise-Fading_ spell. This time James could actually see the damage he was causing him.

Severus shakingly took a deep breath and prepared himself for what was about to come.


	4. The Tests

**Chapter Four- The Tests**

* * *

Myrtle sighed. "Oh, Severus."

She watched as he staggered to the closet lavatory sink and clutched the sides to steady himself.

"Don't...feel...sorry for...me." Severus told her, in between large gasps of breath for air.

"They've broken your nose again." Myrtle pointed out.

Severus shrugged, it wasn't the first time. He aimed his wand at his nose and whispered, " _Episkey."_

His whole face scrunched up as he dealt with the pain and the feeling of his nose turning burning hot and then ice cold and eventually back to normal.

"There." Severus said. "Fixed."

Myrtle shook her head in annoyance. "Why did you go to the Womping Willow again?" She shouted harshly. "You know that's where James always is!"

She quickly whooshed up to the ceiling and looked out of the window.

"It's almost as if you want this to happen." She murmured quietly, almost too quiet for Severus to hear. He did hear though, of course.

"Shut up!" He bellowed in anger. "You don't know anything!"

"I'm just trying to help you!" Myrtle shouted back, turning around and floating downwards to face him. "Why do you deliberately go to places where he'll find yo—"

"I didn't!" Severus practically screamed. "I was in the library!"

Myrtle suddenly halted, confused.

"Oh..."

"They've never gotten me there before. And they wouldn't have been able to do anything if there were any teachers..."

"Why did you go to the library so late? Isn't it almost time for you to be having supper?" Myrtle questioned, astonished at her friend's stupidity.

"I was researching...something." Severus gulped, hoping she wouldn't ask.

Myrtle shook her head once again.

Severus looked at his reflection in the mirror. He studied his pale face, that was almost grey with lack of life. He stared into his dark eyes, full of sadness and despair. He finally looked at his middle-parted black hair that hung limp at his shoulders. After minutes of consideration, he turned to look at Myrtle who was floating at the door, debating if she should leave.

"I'm going to cut my hair." He said firmly.

Myrtle was surprised, but she didn't say anything. Instead she watched as he took out a small pair of stainless steel scissors out of his trouser pocket.

"Why do you have scissors on you?" She asked him. The question hung still in the air. The realisation made her heart (although she didn't physically have one, she could still very much feel) pound and in that moment she felt sorrier for Severus than she ever had in all her time knowing him.

"Severus." She said sadly, but Severus ignored her.

He grabbed a chunk of his hair and started chopping it off randomly. Thin strands of black hair floated to the floor and soon his black shoes were covered in the mess.

His new hair was much shorter. It was only about three inches now. Severus wet his hair under the tap and ruffled it a bit. He looked like a completely different person. His face was no longer concealed by his hair and he felt more exposed. But maybe that would be a good thing for him- he was sick of hiding away.

"Good." He commented to himself.

He then turned the tap off and made his way out of the lavatory.

"Severus, wait!" Myrtle called.

He stopped and looked at her expectantly.

"Where are you going?" She asked.

Severus paused for a moment. Then he looked at her and said, "Back to my dorm."

Myrtle nodded and said goodbye as he closed the lavatory door and headed for Dumbledore's office.

Dumbledore's office had always intrigued Severus Snape. He had only been in there twice, when the bullying has gotten so bad that even Professor McGonagall had noticed that Severus seemed down and was dealing with emotional pain, and so she sent him to Dumbledore to lift his spirits, unaware of the cause for his depressed countenance, of course. The office gave him a deep sense of security that he could not experience anywhere else. And obviously the admiration Severus had for Albus Dumbledore concluded the list of reasons of why the Headmaster's office was his favourite place.

Severus walked into Dumbledore's office after having been granted permission to enter. It took a few seconds for Dumbledore to recognise Severus-he looked completely different without the two blocks of black hair that previously framed his thin face. Deciding not to ask Severus about his new haircut or the reasons for it, Dumbledore proceeded to ask Severus why he was in his office.

"To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit, Severus Snape?" Dumbledore asked, as he leaned backwards into his chair and pushed his small, half-moon-shaped glasses up his nose.

Severus shifted nervously. "Headmaster, I was wondering if there was anything you could tell me about Time-For—"

"Oh Time-Turners! Is that what you came here for, Severus? Well if you're taking that many classes I'm sure we could provide you with one, but only since you're one of our best pupils."

Severus frowned for a moment, but caught on quickly.

"Ah yes. You see Headmaster, I'm taking Muggles studies as an extra class and it's at the same time as Divination."

Dumbledore nodded absentmindedly when all of a sudden he looked up at Severus suspiciously.

"But we're three weeks into the first term, Severus. How have you managed until now?"

"Well, that's the thing." Severus replied. "I haven't. I had to ask Professor Townsend if she could teach me separately but she said she didn't have the time."

Dumbledore raised his eyebrows.

"I wonder what she's so busy doing." He commented, and then his eyes widened as he realised he'd been rude about a teacher in front of a student.

"Well, well we'll get you a Time-Turner then. But you'll have to go through some examinations so that you know the importance of time-travelling correctly. As you are one of our best students, I trust that you will use the devise properly. But you have to take the tests to be sure."

Severus smiled. "That's great, Headmaster."

Dumbledore nodded and studied one of his rings for a moment.

"Now normally we would ask the Ministry to send us one." Dumbledore started, and Severus' heart sank. How was he supposed to get a Time-Forwarder now? The only way was through the Ministry!

"But I've got some business to do at the Ministry so you'll have to come with me and get one yourself."

Relief washed over Severus; he was so close to getting his hands on a Time-Forwarder!

"You'll go through the tests tomorrow."

"Thank you, Headmaster." Severus said before he walked out of Dumbledore's office.

He couldn't wait to discover if his future was as bright as he dreamed it to be.


	5. Lily

**(Extract of _The Prince's Tale_ included, Of course all credits go to the wonderful JK Rowling :) )**

 **Chapter Five- Lily**

* * *

He heard her voice before he saw her. Severus could always recognise Lily's voice even if she was talking amongst a crowd of hundreds. Her voice was soft, Severus thought, and sweet to listen to.

He was walking back from Dumbledore's office when he heard her talking to her friends. They were sitting on one on the benches that lined the stone hallways, all huddled together.

 _"Oh Lily, I wish it was me! You're so lucky! James Potter wants to go out with you!"_ One of the girls giggled, although her jealousy was very much apparent.

Lily scrunched her nose up in disgust.

 _"I would rather kiss a Mandrake than go out with him!"_ She replied in disgust.

To this Severus smiled, and Lily's friends noticed he was there. They stared at him for a few seconds and Severus wondered why.

"Oh Lily, it's that Snape boy. I think he wants to talk to you. Oh and he cut his hair!" One of her friends told her as the rest of the girls giggled.

Lily looked up and saw Severus standing a few metres away, shy and smiling. The surprise in her features were evident as she looked at his hair.

Lily got up to walk to him and her friends quickly dispersed.

"Hey." Severus said, hesitantly.

"Hey." Lily replied casually. "Hair cut, huh?"

Severus nodded, but was quickly astounded at how effortlessly beautiful Lily was. Her long auburn hair fell gracefully on her shoulders and her green eyes shone brightly in the sunlight.

"Look Lily, we haven't talked in a while and—"

Lily started walking down out of the hallway and onto the path whilst Severus was walking nervously beside her.

"I know that, Sev."

Severus' heart leapt in his chest when she called him that, she was the only one who ever did. Myrtle had tried to call him Sev once, but he had shouted at her and said that only Lily was allowed to call him that.

"Well let's change that. I thought we were supposed to be friends? Best friends?" He asked her, boldly.

"We _are_ Sev, but I don't like some of the people you're hanging around with! I'm sorry, but I detest Avery and Mulciber! _Mulciber!_ What do you see in him, Sev? He's creepy! D'you know what he tried to do to Mary Macdonald the other day?"

Severus was shocked. Avery and Mulciber were hardly _friends,_ they were part of Slytherin and so the three boys would hang out sometimes. But Severus would not call them friends. And besides, what did Lily expect? For him to have absolutely no-one  
to talk to? Apart from Mytrle of course.

They had reached a pillar and Lily lent against it.

"That was nothing. It was a laugh, that's all-" Severus started.

"It was about Dark Magic and if you think that's funny-"

"What about the stuff Potter and his mates get up to?" Severus demanded, feeling his cheeks burn in anger.

"What's Potter got to do with anything?" Lily asked.

"They sneak out at night. There's something weird about that Lupin. Where does he keep going?" Severus asked her.

"He's ill." Lily replied. "They say he's ill—"

"Every month at the full moon?" Severus said sarcastically.

"I know your theory." Lily told him coldly. "Why are you so obsessed with them, anyway? Why do you care what they're doing at night?"

"I'm just trying to show you they're not as wonderful as everyone seems to think they are." He said calmly, looking at her intensely.

"They don't use Dark Magic, though." Lily shot back confidently. She then lowered her voice down to a whisper. "And you're being really ungrateful. I heard what happened the other night. You went down that tunnel by the Whoming Willow and James Potter saved you from whatever's down there—"

Severus was fuming. She had _no_ idea what actually happened that night.

"Saved? Saved? You think he was playing the hero? He was saving his neck and his friends' too! You're not going to– I won't let you–"

Lily's eyes flashed in anger. " _Let_ me? _Let_ me?"

Severus immediately backtracked. "I didn't mean– I just don't want to see you made a fool of- he fancies you, James Potter fancies you!"

He found it hard to say the words, as the words themselves hurt him.

"I know James Potter's an arrogant toerag. I don't need you to tell me that. But Mulciber and Avery's idea of humour is just evil. _Evil,_ Sev. I don't understand how you can be friends with them."

Severus felt better as soon as Lily had insulted Potter, he barely noticed her comment on his so-called friends. As long as Lily hated Potter, he stood a chance to be with her.

"I'm going to the Gryffindor common room." Lily told him as she left to walk back up the path they had just walked down.

Severus watched her walk back, even more determined to get his hands on the Time-Forwarder. Maybe they got married, Lily and him. Maybe he'd see their kids. He couldn't wait to see how his life had turned out, it had to be better than the current life he was living, at least.

Severus was called back into Dumbledore's office the next morning. He felt excited, today was the day he could see his future.

"Ah Severus." Dumbledore greeted him as he walked into the office. "You'll be taking these tests this morning. They won't take long, only two hours. And this afternoon we'll go to the Ministry to get your time-turner."

"How will we get there, Headmaster?" Severus asked, wondering. Would they fly? But he wasn't allowed to use magic out of Hogwarts yet.

"We'll Apparate of course." Dumbledore replied nonchalantly.

"Ah, right." Severus replied.

"Well follow Professor McGonagall, she should be here by now. She'll be testing you."

No sooner than five seconds later Professor McGonagall appeared.

"Severus Snape. Follow me."


	6. Professor McGonagall

**Chapter Six- Professor McGonagall**

* * *

"You cut you hair?" Professor McGonagall asked Severus as they walked to her own office.

"..yes. Wanted a change, that's all." Severus replied self-consciously.

Lily hasn't commented much on it, and he had in fact forgotten about his recent change in appearance himself. His previous hair was very thin, and so he barely felt the weight of it on his shoulders. Still, it was nice to feel a bit more free.

"It suits you." Professor McGonagall commented. "You don't look like yourself."

Severus didn't know whether to take that as a compliment, or be offended. He knew he wasn't the most attractive person ever, but surely his previous haircut wasn't that bad? And it _wasn't_ greasy as James Potter frequently stated. Yes, he didn't wash his hair that often but it wasn't _greasy._

They had arrived to Professor McGonagall's office and Professor McGonagall opened the door and held it out for Severus so that he could walk in. As soon as he had, she quickly slammed the door shut behind her.

"Now listen to me, Mr Snape. Time-turners are extremely serious devices to be dealing with, and if I don't think you live up to the standard to be able to obtain one, then I can assure you that you most definitely will not be getting your hands on one? Understood?" Professor McGonagall asked in a very severe tone.

Severus nodded quickly, starting to feel frightened. What had he gotten himself into?

"Now I don't want you to think that having a Time-turner is just a normal, ordinary thing despite what impression Professor Dumbledore might have given you." She continued, as she started walking to her desk that was covered with ink pots and quills, and files of paper scattered about.

Severus believed her indifference to him stemmed from the fact that she was head of Gryffindor House and he was obviously a Slytherin. It wasn't surprising anyway. No one really liked Severus Snape.

"The Ministry of Magic has to give permission for a student of Hogwarts to be in possession of a time-turner. And in order for that to happen you have to take a number of tests and go through a screening process. Then, and only then will you be given a time-turner. That is, if you pass the tests of course."

Severus nodded again, too scared to say a word in case he might say something wrong.

Suddenly Professor McGonagall got up from her desk and peered down at Severus.

"I want to stress to you the importance of owning a time-turner. If anything goes wrong, anything at all, it could have grave consequences."

Severus took a deep breath.

"I would only be using it to go to Muggle Studies, Professor." He lied, as innocently as he could.

Professor McGonagall frowned. "Since when have you been interested in Muggle Studies?" She asked Severus.

Severus knew what she was thinking. She, like everyone else assumed he hated Muggles, that he saw them as inferior because of the fact he was in Slytherin. Yes, it was true most Slytherin's were purebloods and that they thought Muggles were beneath them, but Severus himself was a half-blood!

He didn't think badly of Muggles. Lily was a Muggle. And he thought greatly of her.

"I have always found Muggles very interesting." Severus replied, lying.

He felt less threatened than when he first came into the room, which made it easier for him to lie.

"Right." Professor McGonagall replied.

"My father was a Muggle." Severus told her matter-of-factly.

Severus didn't think very highly of his father however. He didn't think very much about him at all. His whole childhood was filled with fear, fear of his parents when they started screaming at each other, fear of when they started hitting each other, fear that they would start hitting him.

"Well, you must have found him very interesting then." Professor McGonagall replied. "Right, let's get started on the test then shall we?"

Two hours later Severus stood in Professor Dumbledore's office, waiting for Professor McGonagall to appear.

The test had not been too hard, he had had to prove his understanding of the consequences of owning a time-turner, and promise that he wouldn't tell a living soul about it. But Severus was still not confident he had passed the test. Although it was up to the Ministry to decide, Professor McGonagall presumably had a say in the matter and she would certainly not want Severus to be in possession of a time-turner, Severus thought.

Eventually Professor McGonagall appeared, unsmiling.

"Severus Snape, the Ministry would like to inform you that you passed the admissions test and that you are granted permission to be in possession of a time-turner, as of when you collect it from the Ministry."

Severus was overjoyed, but kept his happiness contained.

"Thank you, Professor." Severus told her, and she nodded and left the office.

"Well then, Severus." Said Dumbledore. "Are you ready to Apparate?"

Severus was hardly ready but he nodded and walked up to Dumbledore.

"Keep a firm grasp on my arm." Dumbledore warned Severus.

Severus placed his hand on Dumbledore's arm and watched as the room quickly dissipated into a blur.


	7. The Ministry

**Chapter Seven- The Ministry**

* * *

Apparating was painful. The whole process left Severus as an unbalanced mess, trying to stand up straight. He hadn't enjoyed holding on to Dumbledore for dear life as they span in circles until at last they reached a narrow street.

Dumbledore, however, was unfazed. He started walking to a phone box at the end of the street. Severus quickly got up and ran after the Headmaster, trying to ignore the spinning headache he was currently experiencing. They both walked into the telephone box and Severus watched the street slowly disappear as they descended into the Ministry. They walked into a long corridor which was lined with fireplaces on both sides. Severus wondered why they hadn't just used the Floo Network to get to the Minsitry as there was bound to be a Floo fireplace in Hosgmeade which was not too far from Hogwarts. But Severus had already realised that Dumbledore didn't have a conventional way of doing things. He didn't doubt the fact that Dumbledore was a supreme wizard, he just speculated about the Headmaster's lack of planning, not that Severus was a particularly organised person himself.

But still, the very fact that Dumbledore was bringing a student along with him to the Ministry of Magic seemed very wrong. But Severus was not complaining. In a few minutes he was going to have his hands on a time-forwarder. He hasn't exactly thought up a plan of how he was going to get one, but hopefully it wouldn't be too hard to find. Professor Dumbledore had said that he needed to get some business done anyway, which would buy him some time.

Eventually they reached the front desk at which a short witch sat, reading the _Daily Prophet_. Her hair was tied neatly in a chignon and she wore small rectangular spectacles that sat rigidly just under the bridge of her nose.

"Excuse me." Dumbledore began and immediately the witch sat up and put down the newspaper as she realised it was _Dumbledore_ who was speaking to her.

"Albus Dumbledore." She greeted him, a little too over-enthusiastic in Severus' opinion. "How could I be of help?"

"This boy is in need of a time-turner." Dumbledore said, looking at Severus.

"And has he completed the necessary examinations?" The witch asked, raising her eyebrows at Severus.

"Yes, he has. Here are the results." Dumbledore handed over a large file containing the tests Professor McGonagall had given to Severus.

"Very well." The witch smiled. "Payton will show you the way."

A tall wizard came out from behind the front desk; he had previously been sitting next to the small witch.

"Follow me." He said.

"I will leave you with Payton, Mr Snape. I have some errands to run. Let's meet here in half an hour, shall we say?"

"Of course, Headmaster." Severus agreed, thankful that now Dumbledore was gone he would have a chance to get a time-forwarder. In his head, the plan he had formed two minutes ago all worked out. If he stole a time-forwarder, the Ministry would not be able to accuse him of anything as they denied producing any. Of course that was if he managed to get one at all.

After walking down a corridor for a couple of minutes, Payton unlocked a door to a room that was filled with hundreds of time-turners.

"We need to get your name engraved in it, too." Payton said. "So if anyone tries to steal it and use it, it won't work for them."

He picked one of the time-turners up.

"These are all new developments. Originally one turn back means one hour back, but we've added three more buttons- day, month and year. Not that you'll be needing any of them of course!" Payton winked at Severus, making him feel suddenly very uneasy. What was he implying? Did he know what his plan was?

They carried on walking further back into the room when they reached a large class cabinet. On it was written in gold fancy lettering, _'Time-Forwarders.'_ Severus gasped. Here it was.

Severus turned his head to look about Payton, who seemed absorbed into engraving the time turner with Severus' initials, which he had just asked for. He had his back to Severus and was working on a table, his wand in hand.

 _It's now or never,_ Severus thought. He inspected the glass cabinet up and down and saw that on the top left hand corner there was a miniature lock, located next to a small handle. As quietly as he possibly could, Severus got on his tip-toes and slowly pulled the handle back.

The cabinet was unlocked! It must have been Severus' lucky day. With his heart hammering inside he reached for one of the devices and quickly shoved it into his largest pocket in his robes. He then shut the glass cabinet shut and looked around, trying to appear as innocent as he possibly could.

A minute late Payton turned around, holding a time turner with _S.S_ beautifully inscribed upon it. Severus thanked Payton and took the time-turner into his hands to inspect it more closely- but not before he saw Payton looking at the glass cabinet.

 _Damn it, he knows_ , Severus panicked.

"I think Dumbledore should be done now…" Severus said, the shaking in his voice very apparent.

"Oh yes." Payton nodded. "I'll lead you there."

Dumbledore didn't seem to be in the greatest of moods either, Severus discovered once they had re-joined.

Dumbledore thanked Payton and then left abruptly and Severus had to once again run after him as a result. But he didn't mind- he had a time-forwarder! And if his plan went correctly, Payton wouldn't be able to tell the Ministry anything.


	8. Voldemort Rising

**Chapter Eight- Voldemort Rising**

* * *

Severus stared at the precious item in his hand. A _Time-Forwarder._ It looked very similar to the time-turner, as he had seen in the diagrams in _'Time Turners: What's in store for the future?'_ The main difference was that the poem engraved beneath his initials read like this:

' _I can bring you forward five years, or ten_

 _Whatever the reason, I will grant, then_

 _You and you only, with the marvels of time,_

 _Use at your own caution, this is your sign.'_

The warning at the end slightly discouraged him, however Severus was so set on going that there wasn't much that could stop him. He was currently lying on his bed in his dormitory when he heard the door open. He hid the time-forwarder in his bag and was sitting on his bed reading his assignment when Avery came in.

"Snape." He nodded at him. "Me and Mucliber have been arguing about something. You'll probably know. What's that potion called, that makes you take the truth?"

Severus was apprehensive about telling him, but realising that they would not be able to get their hands on some anyway, proceeded to tell him, "It's called Veritaserum."

Avery scratched his head, "Oh yeah, I thought that's what it was called. But Mulciber didn't believe me."

"Why do you want it, anyway?" Severus asked him, hoping that he was a close enough friend so that the question wouldn't seem prying.

Mulciber smiled. "We think _some_ people have been lying to us lately, and we need to get the liars."

 _Oh God,_ Severus thought. What had they been getting up to? He hung out with them from time to time as he needed to be on good terms with those he shared a dormitory with, but that didn't mean he had to go along with every single thing they did. Although they were hardly malicious compared to Potter in his opinion.

Mulciber went to sit down on one of the two chairs that accompanied the narrow desk situated in the right corner of the room, conveniently next to Severus' bed as he liked to do his schoolwork in peace. (The library was always busy. Well, _usually._ )

"Rumours been going round that Dumbledore's been arguing with Harold Minchum. About Voldemort." Mulciber smirked. "Like either of 'em have got any chance against him, I mean they don't even…"

But Severus never heard the rest of Mulciber's undoubtedly intelligent and perceiving comment on what he thought of the rise of Voldemort as a series of questions began popping into his head. Why did he meet up with the Minister of Magic? That must have been what the Headmaster was doing whilst he was getting the time-turner Severus realised. But why did they argue? What did they disagree on? Was Voldemort really getting more powerful by the minute? Severus remembered the small witch at the front desk of the Ministry. She had been reading the Daily Prophet, and if Severus was not mistaken the headline had been, _'_ _ **FIFTEEN MORE MUGGLE-BORN WITCHES AND WIZARDS KILLED AT MUGGLE BAR IN LONDON, "MOST LIKELY YOU-KNOW-WHO'S DOING" SOURCES SAY…'**_

Severus had heard some of his muggle-born or half-blood peers worrying about their relatives' safety, but he had always seen them as melodramatic and never once actually taking them seriously. However, being a Slytherin, he doubted anyone would appreciate his commentary on the topic.

Severus then realised that the low mumbling had stopped, and realised Avery had left the room. He had been in such deep thought that he hadn't even noticed him leaving. Severus was glad that he had left, though. It meant that he could finally try using the time-forwarder. Although he was nervous, his excitement overruled any fear he might have, and persuaded him to take the device out from his bag, and place it around his neck.

 _I'll need a time-turner too,_ Severus remembered, grabbing the engraved device out of his bag and putting it over his head, so that it rested against the time-forwarder.

The time-forwarder was as developed as the time-turner; it too had the four options of hours, days, months and years. Severus thought for a moment of what year he wanted to travel to. He wanted to travel to a time when his life was all together; he had his job intact, a loving wife and maybe even a child. _Not twenty, then. Not even thirty. Maybe, thirty-five? Thirty-six? Yes, thirty-six. Exactly twenty years from now,_ Severus eventually decided.

He took a deep breath and tried to convince himself that in a few seconds, he would be in the year 1996. He could land anywhere; the thought somewhat petrified him. Dumbledore hadn't told him much, only that it was imperative he was not seen by his past self, so Severus assumed the same applied for his future self, the version of him he was actually going to be seeing.

With trembling hands he held the time-forwarder, and counted the twenty turns before he felt himself be thrown off the ground, lurched into the ever-twisting spirals of time.


	9. Teaching at Hogwarts!

**Chapter Nine- Teaching at Hogwarts?!**

* * *

The first thing Severus realised was that he was in a small cupboard filled with herbs and plants of all sorts and strange things in labelled jars and flasks that sat high on a shelves as the top of the cupboard, accessible only by a tall ladder. There were also various phials that contained a number of different potions. _Why on earth am I here,_ Severus wondered. He was currently squished between two large boxes and was about to attempt to crawl out when he heard someone's voice.

"There won't be much _Veritaserum_ left if she continues to use it as this rate." Someone wondered at loud to themself. The voice was very low and serious, and sent chills through Severus' bones.

He peered through the gap in the boxes and caught sight of a tall man wearing a long black cloak that reached the floor. The man had a concentrated expression on his face whilst he shook the phial of what Severus assumed to be _Veritaserum,_ and muttered again to himself. He had raven-black hair that hung just above his shoulders and thin lips that were set in a rigid straight line. Severus' eyes almost bulged out of his head once he realised who the man was. How could _he_ be his future? How could that man with such a daunting and scary countenance possibly be him?

Severus gulped and squirmed back into the small corner he was in; he could _not_ afford to be seen by his future self.

Severus then realised that the Time-Forwarder brought a witch or wizard to where they were in that time, hidden of course to their future selves but so that they could see what was happening. It was quite clever, Severus thought, as it meant that every time he travelled to the future he would not have to play the finding game with his future self.

He had to wait a few minutes before his future self, _'Grumpy Me',_ as Severus had called him, to leave the cupboard. Severus was aware that he was not the friendliest person, however there was no comparison to the man he had just witnessed. He must have had a fight with Lily that day, Severus presumed. Where was she anyway? Severus couldn't wait to see Lily's future self. Would she be even more beautiful? _Most probably,_ Severus answered in his head.

Severus then looked around again at the cupboard. Where was he? If this was his and Lily's future house, then it certainly was strange.

" _What if I didn't marry Lily?"_ A scary thought popped into head. But she liked him back, he was almost sure of it. She had remained friends with him, even as her being a Gryffindor and him a Slytherin. That took some guts. And she was so nice to him- girls weren't just nice to anyone. The other girls in his year certainly didn't express the same kindness of disposition as Lily did to him. Furthermore, she continuously expressed her hatred of James, just the other day she'd called him an 'arrogant toerag.' That had to mean something didn't it? Even if he wasn't the most handsome person ever, he knew that Lily cared for him, some way or another. And he couldn't possibly picture a reality in which she didn't live with him. It was too painful; she was his best friend.

Severus had managed to get up from the crouched corner and avidly made his way to the door, which was strangely unlocked. _"Grumpy Me_ " must be coming back, he thought to himself as he rapidly opened the door and closed it behind him. He then turned to look around and felt his stomach churn nervously as he suddenly recognised his surroundings. _Hogwarts._ Why was he there? There could be no other explanation other than that… he had become a _teacher._

Severus walked down the familiar corridor as he thought over the revelation he had just experienced. It wasn't possible. How could he be a teacher? He had never had any interest in teaching and in fact he couldn't wait until the day of which he could finally leave Hogwarts, the place responsible for his constant misery for so many years. What had happened?

Severus continued walking down the corridor, eventually reaching the staircase, looking for any clues. He made his way down to the lake he regularly visited to think, a place which was conveniently one that James and his mates tended not to hang out at.

Once he had reached his destination, however, things got complicated. There, sitting at _his_ spot beside the tree that stood directly at the estuary of the lake sat a girl, reading a rather lengthy book. She had gold-ish-brown hair that flowed in ringlets down her shoulders, sharp, observing eyes and a small forehead that was currently creased with intense concentration.

Severus decided to walk down and lean against another tree when all of a sudden she looked up from her book and peered up at him.

Severus noticed that her eyes were caramel brown with flickers of gold inside which he thought looked lovely. They were intense, perceiving eyes that could intimidate anyone. Even _"Grumpy Me"_ Severus thought.

"Hello." The girl said shyly. "What's your name?"

A pang of anxiety hit Severus' stomach; he couldn't tell her his real name. He probably taught her for God's sake. Speaking of which, how had she not recognised him? Although his features weren't as developed as _"Grumpy Me",_ there were certainly some similarities.

"Errr, I'm Tobias. Tobias Prince." Severus answered as confidently as he could. He had used the first name he could think of. _Tobias_ was his father's name and although he didn't think much of the man, he had always liked the name. _Prince_ was his mother's maiden name and he had consequently named his Potions book after her, as _'The Half-Blood Prince.'_

The girl bent her head down, as if trying to stop herself from smiling. "Did you forget your name?" She teased him as she dog-eared the page she was on and put down her book. Severus then realised- it was his hair! The haircut completely disguised him and meant that no-one could guess his true identity. _Thank God I cut my hair_ , he thought.

"I uh, guess I did." Severus smiled back at her. Despite her intense eyes she gave out an aura of ease; she was probably the type of person who could talk to anyone. She had immediately made Severus feel relaxed, which was not a feat most people could pull off.

"I'm Hermione Granger." She told him, patting the patch of grass next to her for him to sit down on. Severus happily acquiesced.

"What year are you in?" Severus asked her, thankfully remembering to ask her the question before she asked him as he would probably end up saying the year that she was in and she would instantly know there was something wrong. The nagging feeling that he should not be talking to her gave him a sense of discomfort but he couldn't help it. No-one ever expressed such kind-heartedness towards him when first meeting him- ever. Of course there was Lily, but she had known him since they were children. And although Myrtle was kind, she would always complain about her own problems. And she was a ghost. How could he deny this opportunity as it was likely it would never come up again? Especially since he had seen his future self, he must not have met and been friends with anyone as nice as the girl sitting in front of him, otherwise how could he be so unhappy? The saddening possibility that Lily was not with him was growing by the minute.

"I'm a fifth year." She replied before asking him the same question. Great, they were in the same year.

"Sixth" Severus answered, hoping that she wasn't particularly acquainted with any sixth-years.

"Ah, that must be why I haven't seen you around before." Hermione realised, nodding her head in thought. "Anyhow, it's lovely to meet you."

She held her hand out to shake his, and he slowly grasped her hand, the feeling being so alien to him. Her hand was warm and small, but her shake was firm. It must be such a small thing to her, shaking someone's hand, he thought. To him it was a complete different matter. He was not used to being touched and the feeling shook him slightly.

"Not many people come down here." Hermione informed him, as she leant her head back against the tree. "That's why I like to come here and read. It's nice and quiet."

Severus understood that she wanted him to leave so that she continue reading. He started getting up when she looked at him in disappointment.

"You're leaving so soon?" She asked him, sadly.

"Oh… well I thought you wanted to read…." Severus replied uncertainly.

Hermione then shook her head and chuckled.

"I tell you I like to come here and read and your first thought is that I'm telling you to leave? You have an interesting way of interpreting things, Tobias!" She laughed.

A part of Severus was disappointed that she couldn't call him by his first name, but the feeling of happiness soon clouded over his disappointment as she got out a scroll of parchment that she had written on in her neat handwriting, with the title _'How to prepare and make the Calming Draught.'_ Severus loved Potions, and he knew how to make the Calming Draught by heart.

"Professor Snape set us a four-page essay." She said, with a small pout on her face.

"Do you like him?" Severus inquired, interested in knowing more about _"Grumpy Me"._

Hermione looked at Severus with a strange look.

"Tobias!" She exclaimed, with a hint of a smile on her face. "Does _anyone_ like Professor Snape?"

 _Ouch,_ Severus thought. His feelings were slightly hurt.

"What do you think of him? He must be nicer to you, since you're in Slytherin." She pointed at his robes.

It was lucky that the robes had not changed design in all these years, Severus thought.

"He's nic _er_." Severus replied, getting the impression that _"Grumpy Me"_ wasn't particularly nice to anybody.

Hermione giggled in response, "Well, he can teach well. There's no denying that."

Phew, at least _"Grumpy Me"_ was a good teacher, even if he wasn't exactly pleasant.

"He's especially horrid to Harry, though." Hermione commented thoughtfully, twisting a strand of her curly hair between her fingers.

"Harry…?" Severus asked; she couldn't possibly expect him to know who her friends were. They'd only just met!

"Harry Potter, of course! Honestly Tobias, do you live in a dream world?" She grinned at him.

"I knew it was Harry Potter! I was just messing with you!" Severus protested, wondering why on earth this _Harry Potter_ person was someone he would be expected to know. Then a terrible idea sprung into his mind. He couldn't be related to _the_ Potter, could he? No, he was far too old. That would mean Potter would have had a kid at 20 years old, and that seemed hardly likely. Besides, he'd heard that Potter didn't like kids.

"Do you have any idea why Professor Snape might not like him?" Severus asked her, wondering himself. Did his future-self have problems with _everyone_?

"Not one." Hermione confessed. "I mean, Harry does give him some cheek sometimes but we all do it…"

Severus nodded, unsure of what to say. He had travelled to the future to see what his life was like and so far, he had learned that he was some miserable old git who taught Potions at Hogwarts, and who had a particular dislike for someone named Harry Potter. Great.

"Oh no." Hermione said as she looked at her watch. "We're both late to lessons!" She exclaimed worriedly, grabbing her bag and the rolls of parchment in hand before sprinting off down the path.

"Come _on,_ Tobias!" She yelled back at him.

"Don't worry about me." He told her. "I'll make my way back to class in time."

Hermione raised her eyebrows before shaking her head knowingly, then smiling anyway. "I'm not fond of ditchers, you know Tobias Prince." She told him before setting off down the rest of the path.

Severus watched her admiringly; she cared strongly about her studies, that much was apparent. He was only sad that he probably wouldn't see her again; he had to focus on finding out more about his future self. What was he doing that resulted in him being that way? A few more time-travelling trips and he would know; he was sure of it. But he had done enough time-travelling today and besides, if a teacher caught him out of lessons he would be in _a lot_ trouble. He reached for the time-turner around his neck and twisted the time turner twenty times; a tedious process. And then, to a creature that might have been watching, he vanished into thin air.


	10. An Eventful Potion's Lesson

**Chapter Ten- An Eventful Potion's Lesson**

* * *

 _(Mid-March, 1996)_

"I have marked all your essays," Professor Snape began, "and am sorry to say that most of them aren't to standard and will need to be re-written, by _tomorrow._ "

The whole class groaned, hoping that their essays were good enough according to their Potion's professor. Hermione doubted that he was _sorry_ for making his students re-do their assignment, but felt secure that hers was up to the necessary standard. She had spent hours laboriously working on it after all. She had been so caught up by it that she hadn't even had enough time to find Tobias to ask if he wanted to go with her to see the lake at 6am, for she knew how beautiful the sunrise made the lake look and was sure he would want to see it. Hermione then smiled to herself. Tobias was such a funny character; he acted as if he had no idea what was going on- he even pretended to not know who Harry Potter was for God's sake! He made her laugh, and his way of understanding things puzzled her and made him even more interesting. She was going to tell Ron and Harry about the new friend she'd made but decided against it- it was nice to have a friend to herself. Besides, Ron and Harry would probably awkwardly acknowledge him and then leave, not knowing what to say. No, it was better for him to stay as her friend only. And she had an inkling that Ron wouldn't like him too much for some reason. And Harry would be going off to find Cho- she was one of main things he seemed to think about these days. She wondered what Tobias' own friends in his year were like- no doubt they were lucky to be friends with someone who liked nature as Hermione realised not many people did. Harry and Ron barely even noticed the seasons changing and she'd always wished someone would appreciate the outside world as much as she did.

"Argh, I spent two hours on that!" Seamus yelled in exasperation, bringing Hermione out of her thoughts.

Professor Snape had started reading the names out of those he wished to re-do their essays. Judging from the two rolls of parchment he held in his hands, it was a long list.

"Well then you'd better get started soon, Mr Finnigan." Professor Snape replied curtly.

"Now where was I…," He said, scanning his eyes over the long list. "Oh yes, Georgina Harpers, Helena Woodcock, Ronald Weasley, Harry Potter-"

 _That was hardly surprising,_ Hermione thought.

"And Hermione Granger."

Hermione looked up from her desk abruptly. _What?_

"Sorry, Professor?" She asked innocently, desperately hoping she'd misunderstood.

"Do you understand English, Miss Granger?" He asked her harshly.

Hermione faltered. He was deliberately embarrassing her.

"As it happens, I do, Professor." She replied in a tone as sarcastic as she could possibly muster, hoping Harry would be proud of her. She turned to him and saw him grinning widely, giving her a thumbs-up.

Professor Snape however didn't appreciate the sarcasm. "Fifty points from Gryffindor." He shouted, glaring at her. "I wouldn't expect rude behaviour from you of all people. Surely the know-it-all would want to keep her record spotless? I'm afraid you've been hanging around with the wrong people, Miss Granger." He told her, glancing at Harry most unsubtlely. "Might you consider my advice to choose new friends, it might benefit you later on."

Hermione rolled her eyes when he wasn't looking, at least she _had_ friends. Which was more than she could say for her Professor. Sometimes, he could be as bad as Umbridge.

"Harry." Hermione whispered to him, when she was sure Snape wasn't looking.

"Yeah?" he replied, bored.

"How on earth do you cope with him teaching you Occlumency?" Hermione made sure she was barely whispering, as no one was supposed to know about the lessons.

"Oh it's brutal. He won't ever give me a break. And I've been doing it non-stop twice a week since January- that's three months!" He complained.

The lesson was more or less uneventful after that; Snape continued to read the name off the roll of parchment and quickly realised that the only students who weren't on it were in Slytherin. _Typical._

Clearly, Slytherin hadn't won the house cup many times when Snape attended Hogwarts, however many years ago it was. Hermione then wondered what her Potion's professor would've been like as a student. A nasty piece of work, for sure. He probably gave his teachers a hard time, and never did his homework. Hermione shuddered, she would not like to meet his younger self, at _all._

When the lesson was finally over, Hermione gathered her things and told Harry and Ron that she was going to the library to re-do her assignment. She had to get it over with as soon as possible. She was about to leave the room when she caught Snape looking at her oddly, with a confused expression on his face. It reminded her of the first time she'd seen him. It had been in the Great Hall, and she had just had the Sorting Hat removed from her head after it yelled _'Gryffindor!'_ that resulted in a loud cheer.

" _Welcome to Gryffindor, the best house!" Percy had smiled at her, as she went to sit down on the Gryffindor table._

 _She looked around to see Professor McGonagall, the Head of Gryffindor, smiling at her. Hermione then looked at the man sat beside her, with black beady eyes, and long, lifeless hair. He looked at her causally for a second before his forehead creased and his eyebrows almost furrowed together as it looked like he as thinking hard, like he was remembering something from a long time ago. His confused expression remained for a couple of seconds before he looked away brusquely, causing Hermione to fear is she had already done something wrong._

Later that week, when she'd had her first Potions lesson, he expressed the same curiosity as he looked at her, like he was confounded by her. When he'd started asking Harry questions, he stared at her whilst she waved her arm about, frantic to answer the question as if it was going to explode from her mouth.

" _Tell me, Mr Potter, what would I get if I added Powdered Root of Asphodel to an infusion of Wormwood?"_

 _Hermione immediately raised her hand. It would make the Draught of Living Death, of course! Snape looked at her with his head slightly bent sideways, as if he was trying to suss her out._

 _She raised her hand further in the air, desperate to gain her professor's attention but he continued looking at her with a troubled expression. Eventually he turned his head and looked at Harry._

" _You don't know? Let's try again then, shall we? Where would you look if I tell you to find me a Bezoar?"_

He sometimes still looked at her with that vague, unknowing expression however most of the time he would just scold her, or mock her for her ambition to know everything.

"Is there something you want, Miss Granger?" Snape asked her.

 _Damn it!_ She'd let her thoughts cloud her mind once again. _I really need to work on that,_ she told herself.

"Well then I have to ask you to _Get. Out._ " He said in an annoyed tone.

He was the one who gave her weird glances! Honestly! Hermione quickly left the room and headed to the library, determined to get her essay done, wholly forgetting about her plans to find Tobias Prince.


	11. Sleeping in the girls' lavatory

**_This chapter is quite confusing, so if you don't understand anything just ask me! :) Time travelling in itself is so complicated, but I've tried to explain how it works in my AU as simply as possible! thanks for reading! xxx_**

* * *

 **Chapter Eleven- Sleeping in the girl's lavatory**

* * *

 _(Mid-March 1976)_

When Severus arrived back in 1976, he realised that he'd been gone for an hour. The time on the time on the wall clock read 9.07pm, and he'd left at around eight o'clock. He'd lost the hour he had been previously been planning to use to complete his D.A.D.A class assignment which was to complete the reading list they had been set back in January, the start of the second term. That, of course, was before he'd gotten all caught up in the world of time-travelling. _I could always go back,_ Severus thought, but then decided against. First of all, the chances of him being seen were _very_ likely; everyone in his dormitory knew he sequestered himself in his room all evening long, only to come out to eat. So if he went to the library, people would be there wondering why he wasn't doing his work in his own privacy. The other day he'd been lucky when he went to the library as it was fairly empty. _Well, lucky enough for Potter to find me,_ Severus recalled bitterly. And if he wasn't at the library he'd have to hide from his past-alternate self who had stayed in his dormitory whilst the present Severus had travelled to the future. It was quite confusing.

Dumbledore had warned Severus about the alternate universes. To put it in simple terms, there was always a reality where you did something different, be it doing your Divination homework or choosing not to, or deciding to go on that date from your ever-dying crush that you've been obsessing over for the last few months. Obviously living your normal life you wouldn't realise this as you, the person you are right at this moment, is living in their own reality, completely unaware of the other realities going on at the same time. Simple, right? Well, not so much when you add time-travel into the mix.

" _You see," Dumbledore had told him, "there is always a reality in which you chose not to time-travel. A reality in which you chose not to ask me for a time-turner; to drop Divination and carry on with your life. When you time-travel, you see your alternate self."_

 _But Severus didn't really understand. "Wouldn't I just be seeing my_ past _self? Of the same reality?"_

" _Yes." Dumbledore replied. "And no, Realities… are a complex thing. You would be seeing your past self, but in an alternate reality. This is because of the laws of time-travelling themselves. What is the number one rule when travelling, Mr Snape?"_

" _To not be seen by your past self." Severus responded automatically, Dumbledore had drilled it into him during the whole of the previous hour._

" _Yes, exactly." Dumbledore confirmed. "But at the exact time you would have travelled back to, there was another version of you that would be doing the same thing you, your true self had been doing. Like reading a book, for example. But that version you are seeing did not time-travel afterwards. Let me put it like this: You, Severus Snape, were eating your dinner at seven-thirty. Then, at eight-thirty, you travelled back to ten-thirty in the morning to go to Divinations class, when you had been in Muggle Studies at that exact time. That is what you, yourself were doing. Then there was Severus Snape,_ other _you. He also went to eat dinner at seven-thirty, except at eight-thirty, an hour later, he went to complete his Muggle Studies essay. So now, if you, Severus Snape, would walk from the Divinations class you'd travelled back to, to your Muggles Studies class that you had attended that morning, you would be seeing your past, alternate self. Why? Because you cannot see your true self when time-travelling. There can only be one you at one single time."_

 _Severus was still hopelessly confused. "I'm sorry, Professor. I just don't understand." He was continuously told how smart he was and yet, he couldn't even understand what Dumbledore was trying to tell him. He felt ashamed._

" _Don't worry, Mr Snape. I shall explain again." Dumbledore said calmly. "The version of yourself that is_ you, _would have known that you were going to time-travel. He would have known that you would be in Divinations class. And that is when time-travelling goes wrong- it cannot work when there is a wizard or witch who has knowledge of the time-travelling that is occurring. The fundamental principles of time-travelling rely upon the fact that it is unknown to the other witches or wizards around. So when you time-travel, you would only be seeing your alternate self, who is unaware that your future self is walking around the castle at the same time."_

" _But how does that work? So the me that went to Muggle Studies… isn't really me?" Severus asked, discombobulated._

" _It is you. It would have been your true self,_ but _the moment you arrived with your time-turner from the future, the reality changed in which it was your alternate self. So basically, when you time-travel, you go back to an alternate universe. This is what time-turners have to do in order to let witches and wizards time-travel. They have to switch the realities of their owners in order for it all to work."_

 _Severus thought for a moment. "So then…, if it's my alternate self, it's not so dangerous if they see me?"_

" _Mr Snape!" Dumbledore scolded him. "Tell me what did I say the most important rule of time-travelling was?"_

" _Not to be seen by my past self, I know. But if it's the me in an alternate realit-" Severus said, before being interrupted by Dumbledore._

" _If your past, albeit alternate self, saw you, it would be disastrous! They would know you'd time travelled, which goes against the principles of time-travelling! The difference is this: if your true self was in Muggle Studies, they'd know you'd travelled to Divinations- this knowledge goes against the time-travelling law, so the time-turner switches the version of you that is in Muggle Studies. It is still you; you will still remember the lesson, but that version of you will carry on their day normally. So now if your alternate self was in Muggle Studies, they'd have no idea that you were also in Divination class. So this agrees to the time-travelling law- it is possible. But if they see you afterwards, they gain knowledge that you have time-travelled- this again goes against the laws of time-travelling. In both circumstances, you have knowledge that you have time-travelled, which breaks the laws of time-travelling. So all you have to do is not be seen by your past self. Which is what, Mr Snape?"_

" _The number one rule of time-travelling." Severus repeated_ again, _finally understanding it._

There was an awful lot of complications with time-travelling Severus realised thoughtfully, no wonder that Croaker guy thought it was dangerous! But Severus knew he was responsible enough, and that nothing could go wrong if he wasn't seen by his future self.

Right now, Severus was in the girls' lavatory. When he had time-travelled back, he'd arrived in the closet of the dormitory. _The_ _Time-Forwarder brought a witch or wizard to where they were in that time, hidden of course to their future selves but so that they could see what was happening._ It was the same for the time-turner; it brought a witch or wizard back to where they had been at that moment, hidden to their past, alternate self. When his past, alternate self had gone to the toilet in the dormitory, Severus had ran out of the closet, through the Gryffindor living rooms and straight to the girl's lavatory. Strangely enough, Myrtle wasn't there.

This got Severus thinking, if he did actually travel back to Divinations class like he was supposed to be using the time-turner for, would he arrive in a cupboard in his Muggle Studies classroom? How would he get out and go to Divination class anyway, without being seen by past alternate self? The laws of time-turning were so complex that it was difficult to actually get stuff done without breaking them. Clearly, Dumbledore had not thought this through. It wasn't as much of a problem for Severus, however, as travelling to the future meant that he was only seeing his future self, not his future alternate self as he had not lived an alternate future yet. What _was_ annoying, however, was the past alternate self situation. He presumed his alternate self would be staying in his dorm, and so he had to stay in the girls' lavatory. Would it always be like this? Would he just have to hide from everyone from now, because he couldn't risk being seen by his alternate self? Okay, to be fair he was the one in the wrong universe, but it was still annoying. The problem would have also arisen if he had just travelled to the past, like he was meant to. Because he would have to carry on the day, as he could not travel to the future with just a time-turner. This meant that everyone who only had time-turners had to re-live the full day from the time they'd travelled back to. So _that_ was why you should only travel back five hours! The witches and wizards responsible for creating the more advanced versions of the time-turner probably hadn't realised this. If you'd travelled back, fifteen years let's say, you'd have to relive those entire fifteen years again. Whilst avoiding your alternate self. There was always going to be the 'alternate self' from now on, Severus comprehended. Dumbledore hadn't told him _that._ That he was going to have to avoid everywhere and sleep in the girls' lavatory from now on. Was it even worth it? He might as well spend most of his time in the future now; it was safer one could argue.

"Oh, Severus!" Myrtle called, as she floated through the door.

"Myrtle!" Severus exclaimed. "Where have you been?"

"Oh, I'm just been circling some drained pipes. Passes the time, you see."

Severus nodded, not really listening. A few minutes passed before Myrtle eyes Severus questioningly.

"What?!" He asked her.

"Aren't you going to go to bed. It's quite late, you know. You were supposed to be in your dorm room seventeen minutes ago."

"Well, I think I'll be sleeping here tonight."

"Oh!" Myrtle giggled. "You naughty boy! Trying to get in trouble, I see."

"No, it's not that. Me and Avery had an argument, and if I go anywhere else Potter will find me. He never goes to his dorm before 11." Severus lied, feeling slightly guilty.

"Well of course you can stay here!" Mrytle told him excited, as if he'd asked for her permission to do so.

"Thanks, Myrtle." He smiled at her.


	12. Trapped

**Chapter Twelve- Trapped**

* * *

Something had to be wrong. There was no way all witches and wizards who used time-turners lived like this, Severus thought as he tried to catch his breath. He had just had to run for his life when he saw his alternate self quickly pacing to the girl's lavatory. His alternate self had been trying to stop the blood that came gushing out of his nose. _Great,_ Severus thought. _Potter tormented all his alternate selves._ But now he had nowhere to go. Sleeping in the lavatory had been horrible, and the aching in his bones did not help alleviate the panic that was beginning to rise in him. He couldn't go _anywhere._ This universe did not belong to him. But the question was- how was he supposed to get out?

Dumbledore would know the answer.

Severus quickly ran to the Headmaster's office as fast as his legs could carry him. His heart was thumping madly, both as a result to the unexpected exercise and of the overwhelming fear that was beginning to twist Severus from the inside.

Once he'd been granted to come in, the words starting flowing from his mouth, in a stream of obvious fright.

"Professor Dumbledore, you have to help me- I can't keep hiding from him- I don't even want to do Divination's anymore- the Time-Turner-"

"A Time-Turner? Is that what you came here for? Well I'm sure we could provide you with one, but only since you're one of our best students." Dumbledore answered.

Severus froze rigid.

"Mind you, you'll have to take a test." Dumbledore continued, straightening the pile of parchment that lay on his desk.

 _He was in an alternate universe. With an alternate Dumbledore. Who hadn't gone to the Ministry with him. Who hadn't told him about alternate realities. Who **couldn't** help him._

"No, I'm fine, don't worry." Severus left abruptly, not even bothering to explain why he'd come in the first place.

He sprinted down the corridor and found that someone had left a cupboard door open. _It'll do._ He reached for the time-forwarder in a state of frenzy and twisted the time-turner twenty times with barely-contained impatience. He needed to see someone real, _anyone._

And then, much to his relief, he spun into the year 1996.

"Severus, you need to go sort them out. There's a commotion going on there. Umbridge has them all acting crazy." Professor McGonagall told Snape worriedly. A huge argument had broken out in the Slytherin common room and Snape, as their Head of House was expected to go and fix the problem.

Snape sighed. "There will be no commotion once I arrive." He told her informingly.

Once Snape had gone, Severus let out a sigh of relief. He was currently trapped under the desk in Snape's office and the position wasn't exactly comfortable. At least he was with _real_ people at least. In the reality that he would one day be living.

He would go and find Hermione, he decided. The thought of her made him calm down a little; she would just crack a joke and make him forget about the terrible position he was in. Looking around constantly, he walked down to the path leading to the lake, feeling certain that she'd be there. And indeed there she was, walking at the end of the path. He ran up to her and then realised that would seem weird; he slowed down before he reached her.

"Hey." He greeted her. She turned to him and her mouth gaped in astonishment.

She looked well; there was an extra spark in those intense eyes of hers and her face was flushed. She looked pretty.

"Hi." She said, smiling. Severus realised that her smile revealed a left dimple, which made her look even prettier. Maybe even as pretty as Lily, he thought.

"What's got you in such a good mood?" He asked her, curious, as they walked down to the lake. She did look extremely happy. "Got the top grade from Snape for that essay you did?"

"Oh, no. My essay was terrible. He made me re-do it." She admitted, looking to the ground.

Severus was astounded. His future self must be playing pranks. He hadn't even read her essay and yet he knew it was probably the best out of the entire class. "I bet he's just doing that to annoy you." Severus told her, truly believing it himself.

She nodded, sadly and Severus immediately felt angry at _"Grumpy Me"._ Why was he such a prick?

"I tried to find you." She said, after they'd walked for a few minutes. And then, when she realised what she said, she blushed. "I wanted to ask you-if you wanted to see the sunrise. At 6am. It's really pretty- and it makes the lake look absolutely gorgeous and I just _know_ you'll love it." She looked at him, trying to see his reaction. Severus gave her the warmest smile he possibly could, probably the warmest smile he had ever given anyone.

"I would love to." He told her honestly.

She was so impossibly kind and sweet. How did people like her even exist, Severus wondered. He then realised that his heart had slowed down to a normal pace- she had made him feel at ease again. It was like magic, the way she could calm him down. A few minutes ago he was panicking madly and here he was, enjoying life like it had never happened.

When they had reached the lake they both sat down next to each other at the tree nearest the estuary.

"Tobias." Hermione said suddenly, when they had spent a few minutes gazing at the lake. "Tell me more about yourself."

She looked up at him, and he could see that she had genuine interest in her eyes.

"Um, well." He began, timidely. "I'm a sixth year-"

"Not like that! I want to know more about _you._ What's your favourite book? What's the quote you live by? What are your parents like? _Who_ are your parents? Do you have siblings? What are their ages? What's your worst fear? Happiest memory? I _want to know it all."_

Severus stared at her. She actually cared about his life? _Oh, if only Potter could see him now._ He wouldn't be able to tell him he'd be a loner for life now.

"What question do you want me to answer first?" He joked, making her laugh.

"I don't mind." She told him. "But tell me!"

He told her he would only answer her questions of she answered his and of course, she agreed.

"My favourite book… has got to be _**"All about Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry"**_. I know what you're thinking. Why on earth would my all-time favourite book be about this school? But it reminds me of the best time of my life, full of hope and aspirations. When I truly thought things were going to get better." Of course they hadn't, as he had later learned. The question of why he was telling her this popped in his head, but he buried it back down.

Hermione looked at him, confused. "You thought what was going to get better? Tobias…"

"And the quote I live by is _'Don't live in the past. Or the present. Live in the future'._ " Severus continued, ignoring her question.

"Tobias!" Hermione exclaimed.

"I'll tell you, someday." The look he gave her was an intense one, and so Hermione knew not to continue asking. The atmosphere had become slightly uncomfortable.

"I thought the quote went, _'Don't live in the past. Live in the present.'?"_ She asked him, giggling.

And just like that, the tension was gone. She was good at that, Severus noticed. Relieving the tension.

Severus smiled at her. "Yeah, but I prefer my version."

She smiled back at him, and a part of him felt sad about the fact that she wouldn't understand he meant it literally. He was literally living in the future.

"Well, don't stop answering the questions!" She protested, grinning at him.

"What were they again? Oh yes, my parents aren't nice people. No siblings that I know of. Worst fear- hmmn. Maybe being trapped somewhere." _Like he was going to be when he returned into the past,_ he thought miserably. "And happiest- when I was eleven. And I got the letter to go to Hogwarts." He smiled just thinking about it. It had been a great day. He hadn't bothered to tell his parents of course. His dad would probably have gotten angry upon hearing the news as he despised magic. And he doubted his mother would have commented on it. They would have argued about it, undoubtedly. It had been a great day because he had ran over to the field beside the lake, where he usually hung out with Lily. She was there and told him she had got in too. _Finally_ , he remembered thinking. _Finally, he'd be able to escape to the place he belonged. With Lily._

"That was one of my happiest days, too." Hermione told him, beaming. "I never felt like I belonged anywhere when I went to Muggle school. And then I got this letter saying I got into to this magical school- well, you can imagine how ecstatic I was!"

"It was the same for me. I can't believe that was six years ago." He said, even though it had been in fact twenty-six years ago.

"Time flies, doesn't it?" Hermione said, and he nodded in agreement.

They both rested on the tree trunk until Severus remembered that he hadn't asked her any questions.

"Hey, Hermione. You know, you still need to answer my questions." He reminded her.

"Well, I'm waiting." She cheekily smirked at him.

"What's your favourite colour?" Severus asked.

Hermione burst out laughing. "What's my favourite _colour_? Really Tobias, you might as well have asked me what the time is."

"Answer it." Severus said, watching her.

Hermione looked into his eyes, trying to figure out what he was doing.

"Green." She said, finally.

Severus smirked. "Some Gryffindor you are. You should have been put into Slytherin!"

"No!" Hermione protested in horror. "Green's the colour of outdoors- I'm not- I would _never_ be a _Slytherin!"_ She said in disgust. "They're horrible!"

Severus was immediately offended, and Hermione quickly realised she had gone too far.

"I'm sorry, Tobias. I didn't mean it. It was a stupid thing to say." She apologised.

"Am _I_ horrible?" He asked her flatly.

Hermione's eyes bulged. "Of _course not_! How could you even say that? You're one of the nicest people I know- and I barely know you."

Severus felt bad for the distress he was causing her, but he was tired of the prejudice people had against Slytherin. And to see that the same thing was happening twenty years later depressed him very much. And on top of all that, Hermione was saying that. Wonderful, lovely Hermione. Who wouldn't say anything mean about anyone.

"Have they… have they been mean to you?" He asked her, as he realised that might be why she disliked them so much. If that was the reason, he could empathise with her _very_ much.

She looked at the ground and played with the grass for a moment.

"Yes." She said quietly. And then she went completely silent, and Severus could see that she was struggling to compose herself.

"Oh, Hermione." He said, feeling immensely sorry for her. How could anyone bully such a wonderful girl? _Slytherins,_ he thought. _Typical._ Although he hated prejudice against his own house, he had to admit that most of them weren't nice people. He only wished that people wouldn't believe all Gryffindor's were nice people- they weren't. A large tear escaped one of her eyes and slid down her check.

Severus went to hug her, and wiped the tear from her cheek with his thumb. Her cheeks were remarkably soft, he noted, but realised there were more important things to be concentrating on.

" _Mudblood_." She whispered into his chest.

Severus frowned, why on earth would she say that.

"That's what they call me. Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle."

 _Where was this Malfoy, eh?_ Severus wondered. He was making up his mind on whether to beat him up. He then vowed that he would never say that word to anyone, ever. Not now that he could see what it truly meant.

"Hermione, listen to me." He told her, lifting her chin up so that she was looking at him. Her eyes were glistening with tears. "You are an amazing, intelligent girl who is ten times smarter than they'll ever be. And if they can't realise that, then too bad for them. Calling you… _that_ word is the only way they can make themselves feel superior to you. But they can't make _you_ feel inferior, not if you don't let them."

She nodded, and he released his grip of her.

"It's nine o'clock." He informed her. "You should be going to bed."

"And you." She reminded him, smiling, whilst wiping away the remaining tears with the end of her jumper's sleeve.

"Don't worry, I'll be going too!" He laughed, making her laugh too.

"Tobias."

"Yes?"

"Did you actually go to class when I left sprinting the other day?"

"But of course. Who do you take me for Miss Granger, a _ditcher_? I know you're not fond of those." He teased her.

She giggled in response.

"Tobias?" She asked again.

"Yes."

"Promise you'll come? Tomorrow at six?"

"I promise." He confirmed, and she smiled, happily.

They walked back together to the Hogwarts Castle, Severus of course anxiously looking around in case Snape was walking about, and said goodnight before departing in opposite directions. Hermione went to the Gryffindor common room, and up to her dormitory where she started on her homework before eventually going to bed. And Severus found the nearest cupboard to time-travel back to 1976 in.

He then walked up to the girls' lavatory.

"Oh hello, Severus." Myrtle greeted him.

"Goodnight, Myrtle." Severus sighed, leaving her to sadly float around the castle, wondering why her friend was in a particularly bad mood. Potter must have got to him again, she thought. Potter and his mates.


	13. Sunrise

**Chapter Thirteen- Sunrise**

* * *

Hermione awoke long before her vibrating alarm that she had set for five-thirty. She was so excited that she hardly slept- but that didn't matter. She was going to see the sunrise- with Tobias! This was the perfect chance to ask him more questions. Of course now she knew what not to ask about- his family, his past and Slytherin. But that left a huge range of other things. Oh, she was _so_ excited! She'd be back before breakfast- so Harry and Ron would have no idea about her little meeting. A part of her wondered how she was so very excited to go and see someone she had met _three times,_ but at the same time, she knew the reason why. There had been an instant connection- right from the very moment they'd met. And that had been a first for her. Paired with the fact that Umbridge was ruling the school which made everyone sad and irritated nowadays- Tobias was the only person who could lift her spirits. Harry was going on dates with Cho and Ron... well Ron was just grumpy all the time. No wonder she was so elated to see Tobias; he didn't seem to be affected by Umbridge at all. That might be because he was in Slthyerin though, she remembered.

She pulled on her blouse, jumper, skirt and robes and then went to look at the mirror. _Ouch,_ she thought. That was not a pretty sight. Her hair was an absolute mess- in fact it resembled a haystack more than actual hair. She attacked it with a _Knot-undoing_ hairbrush, and although it managed to untangle her hair, it didn't help much with the puffiness. In fact it even exacerbated it. She finally decided to tie it into a French-braid and although there were wild strands of hair that escaped, it succeeded in making her hair look sort-of presentable. She did notice thought that her cheeks seemed rosier, and her eyes brighter. It was crazy how easily her feelings inside were reflected by her features. But she had always been an open book- everyone knew what she was thinking by simply being around her. This made it quite difficult to lie, but Hermione realised that this was a good thing, her exposed nature meant that she was a more honest person.

She grabbed a Gryffindor scarf that lay on the bedside table next to her bed- it was so warm and soft that she rarely left to go outside without it. Despite it being spring, it was still bitterly cold. It was Scotland, after all. As quietly as she could, she crept out of the dormitory, making sure that she hadn't awoken anyone. As soon as she'd crossed the Gryffindor common room, she sprinted down the long winding path that led to the lake. It was still fairly dark although she could easily see where she was going. As she walked down she could see the outline of a boy who was sitting on one of the rocks at the edge of the lake.

 _Tobias._

Hermione ran down, with her scarf bobbing up and down and flying into her face. She hadn't even said _'Wingardium Leviosa'_ for Dumbledore's sake! But the scarf carrying on hitting her in the face, reddening her already blushed cheeks.

Once she got there, she was almost panting. Running was not her strong point, she had to admit.

"Hermione." Severus greeted her. And they smiled at each other for a moment. The atmosphere was a little different to the previous ones, Severus noted, but he couldn't figure out why.

"I'm sorry if you're tired-" Hermione started, already apologising for having made him get up so early. He was in sixth year and doing a lot of important examinations, and there she was forcing him to get up at six.

Severus shook his head knowingly. "I'd much rather be watching the lake with you at 6am, than sleeping as I was just doing."

She nodded uncertainly, not sure whether he was being genuine.

Severus smiled to himself. She had no idea of the amount of truth that lay behind his words. He had previously been leaning against one of the stalls in the girls' lavatory and it was most uncomfortable. He'd crept to his dormitory to steal his alternate's self spare robes that he knew was kept underneath the bed. He then washed himself in the prefects' bathroom and put on the clean clothes, feeling much fresher than before. Finally, he took his dirty robes and washed them in the basin using the _Scouring charm_.

" _Scourgify!" He had whispered, tiredly._

 _Then, he had checked his appearance in the mirror. His shorter hair was much more difficult to manage; tuffs of hair went flying in all direction. He ruffled it with his finger to make it look neater although it didn't really work. Still, he looked better than his previous self. The haircut suited him well._

"Doesn't it look beautiful?" Hermione said, in a passionate tone.

The lake did indeed look beautiful. The sun had just begun to ascend and make its journey across the sky. Right at this moment it was just above the lake, creating the ripples in the water to reflect simultaneously the sun's gorgeous rays into the eyes of Hermione and Severus. It was breath-taking. Severus couldn't keep his eyes off it- despite living in a very picturesque place, he rarely took the time to appreciate the wonders of nature. He had been missing out, a _lot,_ he realised.

Minutes past and the two of them sat side by side on a large boulder next to the lake. The wind swirled past the two students, bringing some leaves in its wake. Some of the leaves had consequently gotten trapped in Hermione's French braid, much to her anger.

"Oh nature!" She protested. "I love you, but why do you have to go and mess up my hair?"

She then looked at Severus and they both burst out laughing.

"Perhaps it's jealous of your beauty." Severus said honestly. "And wants to ruffle you up a bit."

She did look beautiful. Very beautiful. As astonishing as nature was, Hermione was even more so. While Severus appreciated the beauty of her features, of her wild golden hair that framed her petite face, of the life in her rosy cheeks, of the happiness in her brown, captivating eyes, he realised something. Lily never looked like that. Yes, she was beautiful, there was no doubt about that. But he had never seen her like _this,_ with beauty radiating _from_ her. Not only was Hermione beautiful, but she expressed beauty and transmitted it to Severus. She was _creating_ a beautiful moment. Severus had never experienced a moment like this before, a moment so intense, with anyone.

 _What is this?_ He wondered. _What's going on?_ What was this strange feeling he was experiencing? It both scared and thrilled him at the same time.

"My beauty?" Hermione giggled. "Don't tease me, Tobias! We both know that nature has possession of the rarest beauty, one that I can only dream of having."

"Nonsense." Severus disagreed. "Nature is amazing, but I think you're just as beautiful, Hermione. If not more."

She looked at him, bewildered. Her face was even more flushed than before, if that was possible.

"You…think I'm beautiful?" She asked him.

"Yes." He responded simply. "But don't you go and think that's all that matters! You're also very intelligent and caring- which is _more_ important." He told her, hoping she would understand.

"Thank you." She said happily. "I know being smart and kind is more important- but still, it's nice to be told that you're beautiful." She smiled.

Over the next hour she asked him some more questions; about what he believed in, what he wanted to be when he was older, and what his goals were. He answered them all honestly, and even if she didn't know it, that was a large step for him to take. He in turn asked her some questions, all of which she answered with integrity and enthusiasm.

Once it was time for Hermione to start making her way to breakfast, she bravely touched his shoulder.

"Tobias?"

"Yes?" He laughed, thinking the questions were over.

"I think you're beautiful, too."

They both smiled at each other.


	14. An Argument or Two

**Chapter Fourteen: An Argument or Two**

* * *

 _(Nearing the end of March, 1996)_

"Hermione? Hermione!" Harry exclaimed, baffled that one of his best friends was completely ignoring him and staring out of the window that gave view onto the lake.

"Hmmn?" Hermione replied, clearly still in thought.

"Hermione!" Harry said again, a little louder this time.

This time she jumped, and turned to look at him.

"I'm sorry, Harry, I was just thinking about something." She apologised. _Or someone, rather._

"I can see that!" Harry told her, raising his eyebrows. She always seemed to be day-dreaming nowadays.

They were sitting in the Gryffindor common room, on one of the tables that sat beside the window. Hermione was in the middle of her D.A.D.A homework, which was not her best subject. And Harry had been telling her about Cho.

"She's fantastic." He said, sighing in happiness. "I just want to spend all my time with her."

That had led Hermione to start thinking about Tobias, and she'd become lost in thought. But honestly, who could blame her? She had a lot to think about.

"I'm happy for you, Harry." She told him.

"Thanks. But there's other things I want to talk to you about. First of all, have you noticed how stroppy Ron has been lately? The smallest thing sets him off!" Harry complained.

Hermione, too, had noticed. Ron was terribly grouchy these days. Maybe it was because all Harry would talk about was Cho and his relationship, reminding Ron that he was very much alone. It had annoyed Hermione greatly too, but now she had another friend, she didn't mind it so much.

"Harry…I hate to say this, but maybe it's because you're making him feel lonely." She admitted.

Harry frowned. "Lonely?"

"Yes, because all you talk about is your romantic endeavours!" She explained, trying not to sound too rude.

"But you don't get annoyed- and you're lonely too." Harry protested.

Hermione paused, extremely offended. She wasn't _lonely._ Just because she wasn't dating someone! Honestly, Harry was so close-minded! It irritated her.

"Thank you, Harry, for that epic revelation." She said flatly.

"I'm sorry." He apologised. "Ok, I'll try to tone it down. And the other thing- have you decided when the next DA meeting is?"

Hermione sighed, she had completely forgot!

"No, I'll schedule it now." She told him.

Harry nodded and leant back on the chair, closing his eyes. Hermione could easily hazard a guess at what he was thinking about, and rolled her eyes as a result. _Boys._

She then rummaged through her bag to find a book she had been using for her D.A.D.A class, when she remembered she had returned it to the library.

"Hey, Harry, I need to go the library for a sec." She told him, and he nodded in response.

She then slung her bag over her shoulder, and headed to the library. Whilst she was walking she heard some footsteps come her way, and looked up to see Professor Snape.

He nodded at her, and then walked past. Her Potion's professor was not unkind, but he certainly wasn't cordial.

In lessons he would leave his students to do the work themselves, rarely helping. On some occasions he would snap at students' if their potion had gone terribly wrong, but other than that he was just a normal professor. Not mean or kind, just a professor. There was a slight exception however- he was slightly mean to Harry; he always had been. He would make fun of him, or mock him when he didn't know the answer to a questions. But it wasn't unbearable- in fact Harry barely noticed. Harry did notice, however, that their Potion's master treated Hermione with particular gentleness, and Harry did not believe it was because she was a top-achieving student. But at the same time he didn't know why. Hermione had to admit that Snape was nicer to her than most students, (even though even then he wasn't super nice.) Ever since the first time she'd met him he looked at her as if he recognised her from somewhere- although that was impossible, and she knew it. Hermione remembered her very first Potions lesson as a first year.

" _There will be no silliness in this class." Snape warned his first-year students. "I take teaching this subject extremely seriously- and you should take learning it seriously, too." He spoke harshly as he looked around the close, his gaze lingering on Harry for a second. Severus Snape then turned his attention to the little girl sitting next to Harry, who seemed very frightened. He looked at her for a second- more than a second- firstly with a deep frown, which scared young Hermione even more, and then a look of recognition with his eyebrows raised in surprise, and finally with a sense of loss and regret, and nostalgia. When he spoke again, however, his voice had lost any harshness it might have had in the few minutes prior to his catharsis of emotions._

" _Our syllabus will be based upon the textbooks that your famous classmate will hand to you, and I expect you to know the details of said book inside and out."_

 _Hermione had to nudge Harry in order for him to realise their scary Potion's professor was talking about him._

" _Oh!" Snape exclaimed. "Does your famous classmate not know of his reputation?"_

 _Harry was still getting used to the fact that he was_ 'famous' _in the Wizarding World, so one could not blame his for not realising that he was being asked to hand out the textbooks._

" _Shall we, begin?" Snape asked once Harry had finished his task._

" _Yes!" Hermione said enthusiastically, as she was used to doing in Muggle primary school. However, she was the only one who had spoken, and the loudness of her voice echoed in the silent chamber, reverberating the anxiety she now felt. He was going to kill her, for speaking out of turn! He was obviously asking a rhetorical question, most likely the way he commenced all of his lessons! How could she be so stupid! The thoughts were threatening to swallow her up in a whole of her own despair. She hesitantly looked up at him, awaiting the scolding that was yet to come._

 _But he said nothing. Instead he smiled at her, and gave her the first cauldron that was stacked underneath his desk. Later, at the end of the lesson, he told her he appreciated her enthusiasm, as not many people expressed such sentiments for the subject. Overjoyed, she had told her class partner, Harry, who muttered something about her luck, and dismissed the subject completely._

After that lesson, he was not as kind. He still treated her with respect, but at times he seemed to resent her being there, and when she said something so typical of her personality, so _Hermione-esque_ , he would wince, almost painfully. She had never discovered the reason why.

Once Hermione had returned from her trip to the library and back to the Gryffindor common room with her book in hand, Harry opened his eyes and expressed his joy that she had returned.

"I forgot to tell you something about Cho! She s-" He started, before he was rudely cut off by Hermione.

"Oh give it a rest, Harry!" She shouted, tiredly. "Stop going on about _Cho!_ " All she was trying to do was get her homework done, for goodness sake.

"Oh, _sorry._ " Harry apologised with strong sarcasm. "You and Ron are two of a kind- can never be happy for anyone else because you're too damn occupied with your own stupid problems and the fact that you two can't admit you like each other!"

Hermione's jaw dropped open in shock. What in the hell was this boy going on about?

"Do you know how _bloody irritating_ it is? That I can't have a normal discussion with both of you because Ron's being a prat and you're can't take a joke? _That's_ why he's so grumpy, Hermione! Because you're ignoring him! I thought you'd catch on from all the hints I've been telling you, but obviously you're too occupied to even notice them! I'm sick of hearing about Ron complaining you ignore him- that you sneak off to places without telling him- I'm done. And when I want to tell you about something that makes me happy- you both brush me aside! Well, _fine._ You two are better off alone- maybe then you'll finally get together."

He stormed up the stairs into his dormitory, leaving Hermione in a state of absolute confusion and bewilderment. After all this time- Ron had liked her back? _What?_ Why hadn't he just said so! It had been so long that she had harboured a crush on Ron that she hadn't even noticed the difference between being excited to see _him,_ or being excited to see her friend. And now that she had met Tobias… she doubted those feelings were even there anymore.

Hermione leaned back on her chair to think. So that was why Ron seemed so annoyed. He must have realised she had run back for breakfast as her face had been red from the cold of outside and she'd been a little bit out of breath. But that didn't give him the excuse to be moody- geez!

All of a sudden the doors of the common room opened and in came Ron himself, seeming very frustrated. Hermione noticed the red marks on his hand and knew he must have got in some trouble with Umbridge.

"Ron! Are you okay?" She ran up to him and grabbed his hand to inspect it. But he pulled his hand away, in agitation.

"Piss off, you." He glared at her, before her pushed her onto the floor and ran upstairs.

Tears welled up in her eyes before she could stop them, and soon her entire face was wet with tear streaks. What had happened to him? What had Umbridge done to him? Ron, her best friend Ron, would _never_ push her like that. What _on earth_ had Umbridge done to this school? Hermione wondered as she let another tear roll down her cheek. Just two days ago she was so happy, watching the sunrise with Tobias, and now here she was, crying and with two less friends. Using the sleeve of her jumper she aggressively wiped the tears away, and made up her mind to find Tobias. He would make her feel better, she was certain of it.


	15. Nowhere to be Found

**Chapter Fifteen: Nowhere to be Found**

* * *

She couldn't find him _anywhere._ Hermione had spent the last half an hour searching the school, desperate to find him. First, she had checked the lake as that was where they would always meet, but when she walked down she was met only with the soft breeze that seemed to whisper _'he's not here'._ Hermione could certainly tell he wasn't there as the quietness of the area highlighted the lack of colour and joy that Tobias brought to the lake, the liveliness she had gradually become accustomed to and in her mind, linked with this place. She then decided to go to the library as she knew how much he loved reading and he was probably looking something up to complete a homework of his. When she arrived there, however, he was nowhere to be seen. She walked down the aisles of the bookcases desperately, and instead of Tobias, was met with harsh murmurs and disapproving tones.

"Did you hear what happened to Ron Weasely?" A voice whispered.

Hermione's stomach lurched, not only had Ron been punished by Umbridge, but somehow the entire school seemed to know about it.

"Yeah, I can't believe it!" A voice whispered back. "Do you know why?"

Hermione backed up to lean against the bookcase, trying to hear the conversation more clearly that was occurring on the other side.

"Apparently it's because," and then the voiced dropped to a very low whisper, barely audible, "of Hermione Granger."

The other voice gasped. "What has she got to do with it?" They inquired.

"Umbridge thinks she's been acting suspiciously, so she tried to convince Ron to tell her something-anything."

"That's why his hand-"

"Yeah, that's why."

"Why didn't she punish Granger?" The other voice queried. "For acting suspiciously?"

"Granger's smart- Umbridge wouldn't be able to get anything out of her if she tried. And I don't think you can get punished for suspicious behaviour as much as Umbridge would want students to be. She punished Ron for lying to her."

"But how did she know he lied?"

"She asked him a couple of questions about Granger's whereabouts these last few days- and she knew the answers to some of them. Well when she asked Ron and he told her the wrong answer- it was obvious he was lying. And she could punish him for that. I think she's hoping he will give in."

A finger then tapped on Hermione's shoulder and she jumped, in panic. It was only Neville, however.

"Are you alright, Hermione?" He asked her as he saw her reaction.

"Shhh, Neville!" Hermione whispered, as she walked with him to the other end of the library. She greatly hoped that those two voices hadn't heard Neville and realised she was right there.

"I'm sorry, Neville." She apologised immediately. "I didn't mean to get annoyed." She then explained what had happened and he nodded, apologising himself.

"Anyway, I was wondering when the next DA meeting is. You see, I've lost my coin." He whispered quietly, so that no one could hear.

Hermione sighed. "Don't worry Neville. It'll be tomorrow at six."

Neville then thanked her and left the library, leaving Hermione to process the information she'd overheard. How was she acting suspiciously? Obviously she was in charge of DA, but she always made sure that it was hidden, and that no one outside of DA knew about it. How else could she be acting suspiciously? Hermione then thought of how everybody acted nowadays. Grumpy, wary, and scared for the most part. Hermione thought of how s _he_ had acted the last few days. Happy, excited and full of energy. _Ah._ Hermione could see how Umbridge would be suspicious- she was the only darn student who seemed content in the entire school! And naturally, Umbridge took this as a sign that she wasn't doing her job properly. She wasn't controlling students enough. She must have thought Ron was the reason she was so happy, and so she went to him for some answers.

No wonder he'd been so angry at her! He'd just been punished as a result of her suspiciously joyful behaviour and he was not even the reason for it. And on top of that, he was hurt she was ignoring him, and suspected she was seeing someone. Someone who was responsible for her sudden change in mood, and who hadn't been punished for it. Guilt began to worm its way into Hermione's body, like a worm slithering its way back into the soil. The guilt squeezed her intestines and threatened to rip her heart apart as she realised what Ron had done for her. He had kept silent- even though he knew about her disappearances at breakfast and had consequently been punished for it. _I truly am the worst friend,_ she thought unhappily.

Neville then returned to the library with a book of how to speed the growth of certain plants in his hand, and that reminded Hermione of why she had come to the library in the first place. To find Tobias! Hopefully he would get rid of her annoying little friend _'Guilt'_ , that had taken residence amongst her other organs inside her body, threatening to stay there permanently.

She decided to try to knock on the Slytherin common room door, hoping he might be in his dormitory. She had to knock a good few times, and very loudly for any response. A tall girl with blonde hair scooped back into a tight ponytail opened the door, with an irritated look on her face.

"How on earth could you forget the passw-" She started when she saw Hermione's Gryffindor robes. "What do you want?" She asked, rather rudely.

Hermione was a little taken aback, she hadn't expected such a tall, demeaning girl to answer the door, in fact she'd hoped for a little first year who might have been intimidated by her. But she had no such luck.

"I was wondering if Tobias Prince was in his dorm? I want to talk to him, you see." Hermione admitted, her voice wobbling slightly. She _needed_ to talk to him, needed his comfort.

The girl raised her eyebrows in a condescending manner. "Is he your boyfriend, eh? Don't know why he'd want to go out with a _Gryffindor_ like you." She commented, looking down at Hermione's bushy hair.

Hermione felt her cheeks redden, as if she cared what that girl thought! Hermione wondered how that girl's head wasn't aching, as her hair was literally scraped across her scalp. She'd rather have messy hair than an aching head.

"Could you just get him for me?" Hermione pleaded.

"I've never heard of him. What year is he in?" The girl asked, surprisingly giving in.

"Sixth." Hermione answered, relieved that the girl was actually going to find him.

"I'll be right back." The girl told Hermione, which made her wonder what year the girl herself was in. If she wasn't in sixth year, she had to be in seventh as Hermione didn't know her and she was too old to be in fourth year.

A few minutes later the girl returned.

"There's no Tobias Prince in Slytherin. And there's no Tobias Prince in sixth year, either. Just asked Henry, and he's in sixth year. He says he's never heard of him. Do you mean Thomas Parter? Although I have no idea how you got the name so wrong, considering he's supposed to be your boyfriend!" The girl sneered.

"Never mind, thank you." Hermione said automatically, dazed.

What had just happened? Had the girl not told the truth? Why would she not? If she was telling the truth, why had Tobias lied about his house, and his year? And just _who_ was Tobias Prince?


	16. Hurt

**Chapter Sixteen: Hurt**

* * *

Severus Snape had begun the habit of sneaking about- it was the only way he could get around, in either universe be it in the future or the past. He looked both ways whenever he walked somewhere, and had almost grown a pair of eyes at the back of his head. His ears had become accustomed to the sound of pacing feet and he could now distinguish between the dangerous ones- the ones that might recognise him- and the not so dangerous ones that wouldn't even notice his existence. He could recognise his own alternate self's foot paces from metres away as he walked in an odd, twitchy way. He could also easily identify his future self's foot paces as they were loud and menacing, and far apart from each other due to the large strides he took. In the future universe, he only needed to be wary of _"Grumpy Me",_ Dumbledore, Professor McGonagall and maybe some other teachers that he hadn't realised had stayed at Hogwarts. Did Professor Townsend still teach Divination? He had no idea. In the past alternate universe however, it was a completely different story. There, he had to be wary of _everyone._ He spent most of his time walking around the castle when the students were in lessons, and he would go and walk to the lake and think about the fact that in twenty years he'd be standing right there, as a sixteen-year-old. It baffled him.

Once, he had been walking along the path when he heard the sweet voice of someone he had not seen for nearly a month. _Lily._ She was walking with some friends and they were laughing about something. He had hidden behind a stone pillar of the hallway to eavesdrop on their conversation.

" _So what do you think of Snivellus' new haircut? He's had it for a few weeks but I'm still not used to seeing him walk around without those two black curtains around his face!"_ One of Lily's friends laughed.

Lily frowned slightly, as if she was going to reprimand her friend, but then decided against it.

" _I'm not used to it either. He looks a lot less like himself."_ Lily said, picturing Severus in her head.

Severus thought for a second; his alternate self had cut his hair, as he had. Of course Severus had already known this as he had seen his other self walking around the castle, but he hadn't really thought about it. The moment when Severus and other Severus had become different people was the moment the thought about time-travelling has popped into his head, after he had chopped off his hair.

" _Less ugly, you mean?"_ Another girl said, making the entire group of girls including Lily giggle in unison.

A sharp dagger pierced through Severus' heart- is that really what she thought of him? He took a second to peer out ever so slightly from behind the pillar to have a look at her. She was carrying her school bag that was slung over one arm, and her long red hair was tied back in a ponytail. Severus remarked that her hair had lost the vibrancy he had once seen in it, it no longer shone as bright in the sunlight. Severus wondered if he had just imagined it before. She still looked pleasantly pretty, though, there was just something lacking from her. Something Severus could not quite work out.

The girls had reached the stone bench that sat to the side of a stone pillar- opposite to the one Severus was hiding behind.

" _So Lily,"_ the blonde girl who was sitting next to her asked, _"I've been catching you staring at a certain Mr Potter."_ The girl winked at her.

Severus turned frigid and if he could have bent his ears forward to hear what Lily had muttered under her breath, he would have.

" _Fran! How many times do I have to say- I don't like him!"_

Fran rolled her eyes in disbelief. _"Why?!"_

" _He bullies Snape."_ Lily replied, fiddling with some of the string that was starting to escape from the seams of her bag. She played with it in her lap.

Severus noticed she had called him by his surname. Was she trying to distance herself from him?

Fran's expression was one of bewilderment.

" _And?"_ She protested.

" _Fran…"_ Lily said, sounding guilty. But Fran was not listening.

" _Are you really gonna sacrifice your happiness for his? James likes to mess around with Snape. It's nothing to do with you. Honestly, you're not his mum. He can take care of himself."_

Lily nodded, as if trying to convince herself.

" _Now apart from that, you can't tell me you don't like James. You can't. It's impossible. Everybody loves him. Best Quidditch player there is, gosh Lily. You're being really ungrateful; do you know how many girls would wish to be in your position?"_ Fran reminded her. The other girls in the group agreed, murmuring in approval.

" _ **You're being really ungrateful."**_

Lily's words from their last conversation ran through his mind. It was a coincidence that Fran had used the exact same words- in a completely different context of course. They both referred to James, however. How someone was being ungrateful because of him. Severus was being ungrateful for James saving his life, Lily was being ungrateful that he wanted her and she didn't want him back. As if James Potter was some sort of god, that had to be worshipped and idolised. And Severus was subhuman, lower than wizards, lower than muggles. He was nothing. He meant nothing.

"I'm _not being ungrateful."_ Lily said, raising her nose in the air.

Something about the way she said it made Severus think she was remembering what she'd said, too. It made him sad, watching her talk with her friends. To a passer-by no one would ever think that she was friends with _'Snivellus.'_ She was embarrassed of him, and even though it was an alternate reality, he knew that the real Lily's thoughts probably weren't too far off. How had he ever thought he'd end up with her? When she spoke of him like this? He'd had no idea that she was ashamed of talking to him all this time. It made his heart ache. A terrifying thought then popped into his mind. If he wasn't in his own reality, that meant that there was no Severus in the real Lily's world. She must have not seen him for weeks. And if she already thought of him as an embarrassing loser when she constantly saw him every day, then what must she think of him now? Was she wondering where he was? Or did she not even notice? These thoughts persisted until he went to sleep in the lavatory after he had shouted at Myrtle to leave him in peace, long after he had crept away from the five girls who had wounded his very soul. He hadn't wanted Myrtle to see him cry, and although he didn't want to shout at her, was too wound up in his own misery to think about the consequences of his actions, and unknowingly left Myrtle to wail as she floated around the castle, hurt by her best friend.


	17. Exposed

_**Chapter Seventeen: Exposed**_

* * *

 _(End of March. Last week before Easter Holidays, 1996)_

It had been a week since she had seen Tobias at the lake to watch the sunrise, and the constant feeling of sadness she was experiencing was not letting her forget it. After she had been told that Tobias Prince was neither in sixth year and nor in Slytherin, she had walked to her dormitory, dazed. Harry and Ron were not speaking to her, and so she shut herself up in her dormitory, determined to read until she fell asleep. It was not as if she didn't have any other friends, it was just that she wasn't as close to them and rarely spent a lunch time hanging out with them. And besides, she wasn't feeling like being social, not after Ron and Harry had yelled at her and she had just found out that her only other friend had lied to her, for some unknown reason. She had decided not to think about it, although it was hardly an easy task.

The next morning, she dragged herself out of bed and to breakfast, not even bothering to tie the mess that was her hair. She saw Ron and Harry sitting next to each other in the Great Hall and when Ron noticed her, he nudged Harry and they both looked at her, glaring. They then turned back to their cereal bowls, ignoring her completely. Hadn't Harry complained about Ron too? And now there they were, sitting together as if nothing had happened. _Wasn't that funny?_

Hermione was left to sit on her own, and she ate her flavourless cereal in silence. Thoughts of Tobias popped in her mind, but she shoved them right down angrily. If he was ignoring her, she most certainly was going to ignore him back.

At nine o'clock, Hermione made her way down to the dungeons for her Potion's lesson. Snape nodded at her when she walked in the classroom, and she sighed, glad that someone wasn't ignoring her. The lesson went slowly and Hermione had to shake her head from her thoughts frequently. It was like there was this raincloud permanently floating above her head, pouring with negative thoughts and filling Hermione's mind with a river of sadness.

Five minutes before the end of the lesson she decided to pack up her things early, as she wanted to go to her next lesson as soon as possible, and then go straight back to her dormitory. But the quick escape she had been planning in her head was not to be the case. Professor Snape had been about to dismiss his class when in walked Umbridge, wearing her favourite outfit, that consisted of a baby pink blazer with a matching knee-length skirt.

"Snape." She smiled at him. He did not return the smile. "I would like to see Miss Hermione Granger, please."

The whole class turned to look at Hermione, including Harry and Ron who had worry etched all over their faces. Even if they weren't speaking to her, it didn't mean they didn't care about her safety.

Harry got up from his seat and was about to say something when Umbridge looked at him and gave him a crooked grin. "Not you, dear. It's only Miss Granger that I want. For now." She said, giggling. "Now come along." She told Hermione, who hadn't even begun processing what was happening.

She followed Umbridge absentmindedly, and saw Professor Snape's confused and concerned expression just before she walked out of the classroom.

As soon as they were out of sight, Umbridge grabbed Hermione's arm, so tightly that it started hurting.

"Let's have a chat, shall we?" She spat, and Hermione wondered how the same woman had just giggled moments ago.

Umbridge dragged Hermione to her office, and Hermione tried to prepare herself, hoping, and praying that it was not what she thought.


	18. Explanations

**Chapter Eighteen: Explanations**

* * *

 _(First week of April, 1976)_

It had been several days before Severus realised he hadn't time-travelled in a while. He had spent the last few days sneaking around, spying on his alternate self. He liked to see what work his other self was doing as he dearly missed completing assignments and how busy it made him. They distracted him from his thoughts, and now there was nothing to stop them. But Severus realised that he missed Hermione, and he wanted to go and see her again.

After he had escaped from the Kitchen, where all the meals were prepared, he went to go and wash his robes in the Prefect's bathroom. The only way he could eat was if he stole some food from the Kitchen before it was served on the tables at the Great Hall, and the only way he could shower was in the bathroom on the fifth floor. He regularly washed his robes there, using the cleaning spell to wash the robes, and the drying spells to dry them after he had washed himself. He imagined it was like what it felt to be eighteen years' old, when you had just finished school and started doing things on your own. It wasn't that difficult, after all. It wasn't like he wasn't used to doing things on his own, with a mother like his.

He decided to travel to the future once he had finished putting his dry and clean robes on, and the excitement of seeing Hermione made him almost forget to put his tie on. Once he had finished getting ready, he took out his Time-Forwarder and travelled forward to the year 1996.

* * *

When she saw him walk towards her, she didn't know whether to jump of joy or hit him in frustration.

"Hey." He greeted her, with an unsure smile on his face.

"Hello." She responded, emotionlessly. He immediately recognised this and seemed to recoil back, like a snake slithering back down its hole.

An ice-cold silence began, and began to thaw Severus' heart in the process; why was she angry at him? What had he done? Was it just destiny for everyone to despise him? She had been too kind to him for it to be real, and now she was going to end the friendship, and distance herself from him, like everyone did.

"It's been two weeks." She said, looking up at him. And when he looked into her eyes, he saw it immediately. _Hurt._ She was hurt, and the guilt doused his heart, unfreezing it as the realisation he had hurt her felt like he'd been hit with a bucket of water. Though his heart was no longer frozen with sadness, it was riddled with culpability.

"I'm sorry, Herm-" He began, but she quickly interrupted him.

"Where were you?" She demanded.

"I was busy." He told her, although he already felt like she had found out something about him. What if she knew about his true identity? But he was still alive! How did it work?

"I need some answers, Tobias." She said, and he saw that her eyes began to water and her body began to tremble. "Now."

But he _couldn't_ tell her the truth. He had no idea what would happen if he did. However he was sorely tempted as he watched her cry, the pain that was evident in her eyes being transferred to his own, dark ones.

"What do you mean?" He asked her, trying to not cry himself. He had cried enough during these past few weeks, enough to last a lifetime.

"Don't lie to me." She said sternly, but the tears that escaped the corners of her eyes exposed her sorrow.

"I don't know what you mean." Severus said. The words were killing him.

"Why, when I knock on the Slytherin door, they tell me they do not know of anyone called Tobias Prince? Why did you lie to me? About who you are? What are you not telling me?" She asked him forcefully, pushing him to the tree. He almost tripped backwards, and had to catch himself just in time. She didn't seem to notice.

"I'm not lying to you, Hermione!" Severus exclaimed.

"Then why did you tell me you're a sixth year? Why do you wear robes that are not your own? Why do you pretend to be a part of a house you're not?" She yelled at him, and then proceeded to bring her fists down onto his chest, like a herd of elephants running across a land.

Severus opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He couldn't think of what to say. He grabbed her wrists to stop her from hitting him again, and she pushed his hands aside.

"Are you…you're not…spying for Umbridge, are you?" She whispered, looking straight at him. "You didn't tell her about the army, did you?" She asked him in a way that made him force to agree with her.

It was only then that Severus noticed, with fury, the deep pink scars on the back of her hand, that carved now unreadable letters into her skin. And then, Severus realised what she had thought he'd lied to her for. Hermione had told him about DA the day they had watched the sunrise together, and had even asked him if he wanted to join them. And now, Umbridge must have found out about it, as she had clearly been punished. The angry red scars on her hand could not be interpreted differently. And Hermione assumed he had been the one to tell Umbridge, and not surprisingly so, as he had lied about his house and his year. She suspected him of only talking to her for information, to report back to Umbridge. No wonder she was so upset. And to make matters worse, he hadn't come to see her for two weeks.

"Of course, not." He reassured her. "How could you even think I would do something like that?" He reached for her injured hand, but she pushed him away, much like Ron had done. She didn't care.

"Then who are you?" She asked him, stepping closely up to him.

"Tobias Prince." Severus answered, trying to not gulp in fear. Hermione's threatening eyes were playing to their advantage and he was positively petrified.

"And how old are you, Tobias Prince?" Hermione asked.

"I'm actually in seventh year." Severus said, desperately hoping she wouldn't know he was lying.

"Why did you lie to me about that?" She questioned, baffled.

"I just thought it would seem weird. Me talking to you even though I'm two years older." Severus lied, hoping she would buy it.

"That is the most stupid reason I have ever heard!" Hermione exclaimed, but Severus could tell that her voice had lost the venom it had previously been laced with.

"And my robes- well I have to wear spare ones." Severus said, conjuring up the most believable lie he could possibly think of. "Some people in my year thought it would be funny to strip me of them and then burn them whilst I was still standing there." Severus said truthfully, recalling the time James had thought of the idea. "And my parents couldn't afford to buy me a new pair of Ravenclaw robes- so I had to get the cheapest second hand ones- and they happened to be Slytherin." Severus said, easily pretending to be embarrassed.

Hermione looked at him and considered for a moment. Severus held his breath during the few seconds she pondered his integrity. He felt as if he would almost explode. _What was she thinking?_

And then, all of a sudden, she burst out crying again.

"No Hermione, plea-"

"No, Tobias." Hermione said, in-between sobs. "I'm crying of relief. I really thought you had lied to me so you could snitch about DA. You don't know how many times she made me write…" She stopped talking and started crying again.

Severus, meanwhile, was in a midst of intense conflict and turmoil. There were so many feelings igniting within him that he could barely contain them. He was relieved that Hermione believed his story and that she no longer thought he had outed her and DA. He was also extremely guilty that he was the reason for which she had started crying. He was immensely angry at the person who _had_ actually told Umbridge about DA, just looking at Hermione's hand made him boil up with rage. And lastly he felt devastated that he had to lie to her _again,_ was this the only way their relationship would work? He felt ashamed that she had believed him so easily; she trusted him so much, although he didn't know why, that she didn't even think he could be lying to her again. That, or maybe she didn't want to believe that he was lying. Either way, he was glad to see her again, and that she was no longer angry at him.

"If I didn't trust you so much, you would be withering on the ground after the effects of the perfectly executed hex that my wand would have sent you." Hermione smiled at him, suddenly grabbing his hand and holding it in both of hers.

Severus had not expected the actions, and his stomach lurched in response. Her hand was once again amazingly warm and soft, and he stared at her in wonder as she traced his hand with her index finger, from his knuckles to his fingernail.

"Why do you trust me so much?" Severus asked her, as he reached to wipe the stray tears from her cheeks with his free hand.

"I don't know." Hermione whispered. "You make me feel very secure."

Severus was shocked. He made her feel like that too?

"And I wouldn't be able to stand it if I didn't trust you. Right now… I don't have anybody else to put my faith into." She said sadly, staring at his hand.

Severus was puzzled by her words but knew better than to ask her. Instead, he put both of his hands into hers and enjoyed the warmth that radiated from them, despite the cold outside temperature.

"You have really nice hands." Hermione commented after a while.

Severus laughed, thinking it was a rather strange comment. "Thanks?"

"Like piano hands. Do you play?" She asked him. Even though pianos were invented by Muggles, wizards and witches too appreciated the beautiful sounds of music.

Severus shook his head.

"It's a shame." Hermione said. "You would have been a great pianist." She smiled.

Severus smiled back; perhaps he should learn and play her a piece. Anything to make her happy.

They remained in silence for a moment, enjoying each other's company until Severus noticed Hermione had a troubled expression on her face.

"What's wrong?" He asked her immediately.

Hermione looked down at the grass for a few seconds, unsure of whether to tell him. Eventually she looked back up at his dark eyes.

"Toby." She whispered. "What were you actually doing? For two weeks?" She said, uncertainly.

"Hiding." Severus said instantly, which was the most truthful thing he could have possibly said.

"From who?" Hermione inquired, turning her head sideways, as if trying to figure him out.

"Hermione." Severus said, quietly. "Those people who ruined my robes- they won't leave me alone. I don't want to tell you- it's embarrassing." He even coloured slightly as his words echoed some truth.

"You can tell me anything." Hermione said. "I'll sort them out for you. Do they come down here? Is that why you didn't want to come? We can meet some other place if you want?" She suggested.

Severus shook her head. She was too lovely, too kind. "'Mione." He said, making her smile. "Did you know that you are the loveliest person to have ever existed?"

She blushed crimson at his words. "It might have been revealed to me, yes." She teased.

"Well then I don't need to say it then. That you really are the most wonderful person I have ever met in my entire life." Severus said emotionally, truth spilling from every word.

Hermione looked at him in disbelief. "And you _really_ thought that you being eighteen would be a problem; that I wouldn't want to talk to you. You're so silly! I'd want to talk to you even if you were thirty!" She joked, and the irony hit him like a train.

But he managed to compose himself and decided that now he had to tell her. Tell her what he felt.

"Hermione, I am so sorry for lying. For making you think what you did. Please believe me, I would never, _ever_ , expose the DA. How could I do that, knowing what she would do to you?" He traced the scars of her hand. "I want to go with you, the next meeting-" He said boldly, not sure whether he could keep the promise but making it all the same.

"Oh don't worry about that." Hermione interrupted him. "DA doesn't exist anymore. Umbridge made sure of that." She said, sadness echoing from her voice.

"Well you can continue practising spells on your own. You're skilled enough by far." He told her.

She smiled, in spite of the recent events.

"And lastly, the reason for which you have to believe me is-"He paused. Fear had started to crawl its way into him. But he ignored it and continued. She had to know. "How could one put someone they like so much, with such passion, in a situation of danger, for their own gain? I like you very much, Hermione." He managed to say, despite his nerves. "And I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I was the reason for those marks on your hand."

Hermione was stunned; her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were wide in astonishment.

"So this is what it's like!" She wondered aloud. "Nothing like with Krum!" She exclaimed.

Severus had no idea what she was going on about, but was more than happy to let her continue her soliloquy.

"I like you too, Tobias! But you obviously know that." She told him.

Severus hadn't known that, and his face lightened up instantly at her confession.

"Don't even act surprised!" She said, giggling. "You knew it from the start!"

"I honestly had no idea." Severus said truthfully.

Hermione shook her head. "Then you're more oblivious than I thought." She smiled. "Come here." She gestured for him to lie down and he did so, without complaining. She then rested her head on his shoulder and held his hand in her own.

Severus' heart was beating madly, and he could feel Hermione's was doing the same as his arm rested right over her chest.

He didn't mind hiding for this, he thought. For the happiness and contentment he was experiencing right now was one that he had previously only dreamed of.


	19. Accusations

**Chapter Nineteen: Accusations**

* * *

 _(Start of second week of Easter holidays in April, 1996)_

Hermione was jubilant. There was no other word to describe the mood she was currently in. She was standing in her dormitory in front of the tall, full-length mirror, twirling in her Gryffindor scarf and humming happily. The scarf reminded her of the sunrise at the lake, which she decided was now one of her happiest memories. There was no else in the dormitory, and so she didn't hesitate to dance joyfully and sing to her heart's content. She sang the songs of her childhood, Muggle songs, as she spun around the room. She felt so elated and weightless, as if she could float off into a cloud of contentment. After she had told Tobias about her feelings for him, they lay together on the grass bank of the lake. They occasionally spoke, but just the feeling of each other's presence was enough for them both. Afterwards, she had skipped, yes, s _kipped_ , to her dormitory. It was incomprehensible how much her mood had changed from just a week prior. When Umbridge had dragged her to her office, the panicky feeling of dread was attacking Hermione's nervous system, and she felt like she was almost going to pass out.

She stopped singing for a moment and sat on her bed as she thought back to what happened in Umbrige's office the previous week.

" _You think you're so clever." Umbridge snarled at her, her eyes like daggers. "You may be a cunning girl Miss Granger, but you underestimate my power over your peers."_

 _Hermione's heart skipped a beat. What was she saying?_

" _I have to admit you are very intelligent. The coins!" Umbridge exclaimed. "Well, that was nothing short of genius!"_

 _It was then that Hermione knew Umbridge had found out. About Dumbledore's Army. What was she going to do to her?!_

" _But even the most intelligent make mistakes." Umbridge smiled. "For instance, trusting the wrong people."_

 _Nothing could stop the panic erupting in Hermione's veins now. Who had told? There was no one she could think of who would have snitched._

" _I-I don't know what you're talking about, Headmistress." Hermione managed to say, although her wavering voice gave it away._

 _Umbridge frowned in anger, and walked up to Hermione so that her face was just inches away from hers._

" _You and your stupid friends have been_ illegally _partaking in carrying out meetings for an organisation called Dumbledore's Army."_

 _Hermione tried to remain eye contact steadily, to show she wasn't nervous, but Umbridge's terrifying expression caused her to look away after no less than three seconds._

" _And?" Umbridge prompted her, awaiting an explanation._

 _But Hermione remained silent, trying to think of an excuse, but none would come._

" _Answer me!" Umbridge roared angrily, her fist slamming onto the table._

 _Hermione jumped in her seat, and tried to control her shaking hands. She could feel some tears starting to fill her eyes, and tried to blink them away._

" _I never took part in anything!" Hermione cried, letting the tears break free. Her chest heaved up and down from the huge draws of breath she took; she was wailing like an infant wanting milk from its mother._

" _Liar!" Umbridge screeched, and she pushed a quill into Hermione's hand, one that Hermione knew would break her skin the minute she wrote with it._

" _I want you to write out, 'The criminal organisation that is Dumbledore's Army has been disbanded, and I will be punished as a result.'" Umbridge said, giggling in delight as she awaited what was about to happen._

 _Hermione closed her eyes, and willed that it was just a dream, that DA was still very much existing and that Umbridge had no idea about it._

 _But Umbridge's yells wouldn't let her wishes be, and she started writing the words out, all the time still sobbing._

Hermione shook the memory away. The pain had been excruciating, and Umbridge had made her write it out five hundred times. There was a point when Hermione had thought, when Hermione had wished, that her hand would just come off. Afterwards, when she had walked to her dormitory, the sensation of searing pain could still be felt in her hand.

Whilst her hand had throbbed with intense agony, she had thought about who could have possibly told Umbridge. She went through every single person who was part of DA, and yet she doubted any of them had told her. Then, Hermione realised that she had jinxed the parchment that had everyone's names written on, and she ran to her bag to look for it. But when she held the parchment up in her hands, she saw that it had not been anyone that was actually part of DA. The jinx on the parchment meant that if anyone had snitched about DA, the words _'SNEAK'_ would be written across their face in spots, but also would be written next to their name on the actual parchment. But the word _'SNEAK'_ was nowhere to be seen on the parchment, nor on anyone's face. That meant that the organisation had been betrayed by someone outside the DA, but who had known about it. Hermione thought about who could possibly have known, when the realisation made her hand sting ever further. _Tobias._ She had told him all about DA. She had even invited him to join it, for Dumbledore's sake. But he couldn't have snitched. He wouldn't have. Would he? Hermione then thought about the fact she didn't even know who Tobias actually was. Was it a coincidence that he had lied about his house and year, hadn't been around for two whole weeks and now someone had betrayed DA? But Hermione couldn't believe it, in fact she refused to believe it. If he was on Umbridge's side, she would officially have no one.

When Tobias had told her about the bullying he had endured, and the fact he had lied to seem younger, she believed him because she had wanted to believe him, more than anything else. And when he had told her what he felt about her, she had forgotten about the matter entirely. When she was with him, it was as if nothing else mattered., And she was not about to let Umbridge ruin just about the only good thing she had. Not now, when it had all just come together.

So there she was, dancing for joy in her dormitory, celebrating the fact that Tobias did in fact like her back. She still had no idea what they were, but was more than happy at this moment. It might seem strange how she was completely disregarding everything for her happiness in this moment, but she was tired of always worrying about everything. All her life, all she had done was worry. Worry about exams, about friends, about getting into trouble. She was tired of it. For the first time in her life she had experienced the wonders of love, and the last thing she was going to do was worry about DA. She was going to be happy for herself, for once.

Just then, as if ironically, her roommate Lavender Brown came in. She saw Hermione twirling about, happily singing to herself.

"You are disgusting." Lavender told her, in revulsion.

Hermione stopped mid-twirl, and turned to look at the girl with long, curly mouse brown hair. She did not look pleased at all. Hermione had hoped that she would be spending the Easter holidays in her dorm alone, obviously going to see Tobias, but she wanted to have the whole dorm to herself. Her parents were going away on holiday for their twentieth anniversary, and so Hermione was gladly staying at Hogwarts for the three-week holiday. But of course, Lavender Brown was staying also.

"And why am I so disgusting, may I ask?" Hermione responded, not really caring about the answer. She was acquainted with Lavender, but didn't particularly like her. All she wanted was to dance, _alone._

Lavender guffawed. "You really don't know?" Lavender stepped further into the room and walked up to Hermione. "You really _forgot_ about how DA had been outed?"

Hermione clasped her fists in rage. " _I_ didn't tell anyone! How is it my fault?"

Lavender raised her eyebrows. "You're the one who jinxed the parchment. And I doubt you'd want to have the word _'SNEAK'_ written in red spots all over your face. I bet you scribbled out your name from that parchment when no one was looking. And besides, you have the parchment. No one else can see it, so we have no idea who did it."

Hermione was fuming with rage. "You're accusing _me?_ You think I'm the person who told Umbridge, even though I'm the one who created the group in the first place?" She was shouting now.

"Yes." Lavender replied simply, happy with what reaction she was getting out of Hermione. "Have you even taken a second to realise how suspicious you seem? Just a week before Umbridge finds out, you cut off ties with Harry and Ron, and no one knows why."

"That's none of your business!" Hermione barked at her, red in the face.

"Seems to me that they knew you were gonna tell. I just don't know why they didn't try harder to stop you. And then everybody knows you're always sneaking about- in the morning, the evening, even at lunch. No one knows where you go. And then there's now. I come in to this room expecting to see you sad, perhaps even crying. Any normal person would be if they were in your circumstances. But no. You're _dancing._ And s _inging._ Despite the disastrous events in the last few weeks, you have the audacity to be happy! Well I'm sorry to say Hermione, but you seem just a little bit suspicious."

Hermione was outraged. How _dare_ Lavender accuse her of telling Umbridge about the DA? When she was the one who bore red marks on the flesh of her hand? Lavender had always hated Hermione, and now was the perfect opportunity for her to criticize her.

"How dare you say that!" Hermione yelled at her. "Look at my fucking hand!"

"She did that to all of us!" Lavender screeched back, showing her hand that also exposed deep pink welts in the skin. "After she had found out for sure, she made us all write sentences upon sentences-"

"Stop!" Hermione cried. She couldn't bear it any longer. "Get out!" She screamed as once again tears began to burst from her eyes. It seemed that she was going to spend the rest of this holiday crying.

"Fine!" Lavender shouted back. "I hope the guilt kills you!" She then slammed the dormitory door, which threatened to break upon the sheer impact.

Hermione was left as a crying mess on her bed. What is it _was_ her fault? What if she hadn't been secretive enough? What if someone had heard her in the library when she had told Neville when the next meeting was? But she hadn't removed her name from the parchment. Hermione laid on the bed, trying to think of who on earth could have told Umbridge. She was determined to find out; Lavender wouldn't be able to accuse her forever.


	20. Books

**Chapter Twenty: Books**

* * *

Severus was truly relieved that the Easter holidays had finally come. There were two reasons for which the holiday brought him immense happiness- the first being that everyone had left Hogwarts to stay with their families, including his past alternate self. This meant that he didn't have to hide anymore- well in the past universe at least. Of course there were still some students who stayed, however he didn't know any of them and doubted they knew him. The second reason was that Hermione was staying at Hogwarts for Easter, and so she didn't have any lessons. This meant that he could spend as much time with her as he liked. He still had to avoid _'Grumpy Me'_ and a few other teachers but the task was hardly difficult considering he'd had a lot of practise in the past few weeks in the past alternative universe. At times he would curse Dumbledore for putting him in this situation, but other times he was in such a good mood he would hardly notice the crisis he was in. Times like when he was with Hermione, for example. He had considered spending a few nights in the future universe but he didn't know what the effects would be and if it would be difficult to get back. _Get back to what?_ His inner voice asked him. He had to agree; getting back to the wrong universe wasn't something he looked forward to every time he took his time-turner out. But still, he wasn't sure of the risk and therefore had not yet tried it.

Severus had thought a lot about what Hermione had said, about DA. He couldn't believe this _'Umbridge'_ person had punished Hermione in such a way. What had happened to Hogwarts? He had been travelling back and forth so much between the years that he hadn't taken a moment to reflect about what had changed. He hadn't had much chance to look inside Hogwarts but from what he'd seen the castle had remained exactly the same. Although when he had landed in his future self's cupboard the first time he had time-travelled he had seen a few new Potions, that as far as he knew didn't exist before. Obviously he didn't have the knowledge of every Potion in the world but he took the subject very seriously, and had read nearly all the books written on the topic. So for him to see a Potion and not recognise, meant that it was probably new. What must have changed, however, was the laws on child policy. Was it now deemed acceptable to physically punish students? What had made it to be so? Severus thought about the fact that Hermione had referred to Umbridge as headmistress. If she was now in charge of the school, what had happened to Dumbledore? Where had he gone? And perhaps the most important question of all, what actually was Dumbledore's Army?

Severus decided that he would ask Hermione in a very subtle way so she would not be puzzled as to why he didn't know what had happened in the past few years if he asked her blatantly. So there he was, sitting under his future self's desk, waiting to go and find Hermione. Severus had gotten used to patiently waiting for his future self to give him a chance to leave when he time-travelled into the future, but there were times when Severus travelled to the hour when future Severus would mark his student's work in his office, and he would not leave until every piece of work had been completed. This time was no exception. Severus wriggled uncomfortably under the desk as he listened to the nib of the quill scratch against the surface of the parchment, as _'Grumpy Me'_ wrote his comments on his student's essays. Severus pondered over the fact that this was what he would be doing in twenty years. He had never had any interest in teaching, let alone marking. What had caused him to change his mind, he wondered. Every so often his future self would comment on the essay he was reading, and it was usually in disgust.

"Argh, Longbottom! That boy will never learn. Destined for failure, he is." _'Grumpy Me'_ muttered, annoyed.

Severus could hear the sharp scratches of the quill, that sounded as if he had drawn two lines over the entire essay. Severus sincerely hoped that his future self hadn't just crossed out the whole thing- someone had worked hard on that!

Future Severus then discarded the essay on the edge of his desk and then turned to the next one.

"Potter! Let's see what nonsense he writes this time."

Severus could hear the discontentment in his future self's voice. Why was he so bitter about this boy? It couldn't be _Potter_ Potter could it?

"Ha!" Future Severus exclaimed suddenly. " _'I didn't have time to finish it, sir.'_ How arrogant! Just like his bloody father!"

Severus' eyes widened. Well. It seems that James did indeed have a son. And quite young, too. _Who was the mother?_ Severus wondered.

A few minutes later Severus could hear his future self go quiet, and temporarily stopping himself from insulting all of his students. What had made him go so quiet? Whose essay was he now marking?

" _Hermione."_ Severus Snape whispered, miserably.

Severus could hear the sadness and emotion in his future self's voice. It was only then that he realised- if his future self was here at Hogwarts sadly saying her name it meant that they hadn't ended up together. Sadness began pouring into the young Severus and now both of them were sadly thinking about the same girl. Severus sighed inwardly, of course they hadn't stayed together. What had he been thinking? It would never have worked. They lived in two different times- they didn't belong together, his mind told him. But his heart protested, there was no way they weren't meant to be, not with the feelings he felt when he was with her. If his future self was mourning this as well, it meant that he hadn't ever found anyone else. Hermione had always been his one true love. The thought was both comforting and extremely saddening.

His future self then got up abruptly and left the room, gone to God knows where. Severus didn't particularly care, as long as he could leave the room. He scrambled out from beneath the desk and quickly brushed off all the dust that had collected on his robes whilst he had been sitting under the desk.

Determined to find Hermione and ask her all the questions that were shouting in his head, he set off down the corridor.

He found her in the library. Now that it was the Easter holidays, there was hardly anyone about and so he could roam the castle as he pleased. After he had checked all the corridors and outside he decided to try the library. He knew that she too loved to read.

And there she was sat, on one of the library chairs. In all these years the library had not changed one bit. The furniture was exactly the same and even the formation of the tables had remained. Severus didn't know whether it was a result of the librarian not liking change of that they were too lazy to mix it up a little bit. Not that Severus minded; it made finding Hermione at the back of the library easier. He had expected her to be devouring a book, or maybe doing some extra homework. But she was just sat there, seemingly deep in thought. When he walked over to her and called out her name she jumped in surprise and blushed.

"Tobias!" She stammered.

"Hello." He smiled pleasantly at her.

She smiled nervously back. "Sorry, I was just in deep thought." She apologised, rubbing her temples.

"Yes, I can see that!" Severus laughed. She put him in such a good mood. "Care to tell me what about?"

Hermione winced, not knowing if she should tell him. After a few seconds she decided to, as maybe he could help her.

"It's just…I want to know who actually told Umbridge about DA. Some people…they think it's me who told her."

"What?!" Severus exclaimed. "But that's ridiculous!"

She looked at the floor sadly, remembering what Lavender had said. _You disgust me._

"Maybe I could help you?" Severus suggested. "But you'll have to tell me more about DA."

"Sure." She replied. "What do you want to know about?"

"Well, why did you start it?" Severus asked.

"Because of Umbridge's teaching. Or lack of teaching, rather." Hermione said bitterly. "We needed someone to actually show us how to cast defence spells, because nowadays we'll never know when we'll need to use it. With You-Know-Who around…" Hermione went quiet.

You-Know-Who? Severus had completely forgotten about him. Had he grown stronger in the past twenty years? Presumably no. If he had, he'd be ruling over the world by now.

"He's getting stronger." Severus said matter-of-factly.

"Yes." Hermione said sadly, seemingly guilty.

"What's wrong?" Severus asked, as he noticed her discomfort.

"It's just…I need to be there for Harry. And we've just argued about the silliest thing."

He looked at her with sympathy. "Tell me."

She looked back up to him with a look that knew meant she wasn't telling him something.

"It's nothing really." She then saw that Severus appeared saddened by the fact she wouldn't tell him. But she _couldn't_ tell him. It was too embarrassing! He didn't need to know about her history with Ron. "Honestly, Tobias. Don't worry about it."

He nodded, unconvinced. She was about to carry on when his expression changed to one of gratitude as he walked closer to her. Severus had decided it didn't matter- he didn't want to push her into saying things she didn't want to. It was her right and he didn't need to know e _verything._ Instead, he went and gave her a big hug. The feat was surprising for Severus to take as he was very unused to physical contact, and to be the one initiating it was very unlike him. He liked it.

Hermione immediately felt relaxed once he had hugged her, despite her heart racing. She enjoyed being in his embrace and closed her eyes for a few seconds, relishing in it.

After a few seconds she could feel Severus, or Tobias as she knew him, trying to lean over her shoulders as he hugged them. _What on earth is he doing,_ she wondered. She opened her eyes and saw that he was reading one of the books on the library bookshelf.

"Tobias!" She exclaimed, beginning to laugh.

"Sorry." He apologised. "It just seemed really interesting."

She shook her head; the boy really was obsessed with books. She then grabbed his hand and brought him to the other end of the library.

"Now if you want something _really_ interesting to read, you have to try these."

Severus looked at the enormous bookcase Hermione was pointing at and smiled. Of course she had read every single one. Of course she had.


	21. Narrow Escape

**Chapter Twenty-One: Narrow Escape**

* * *

 _Where do I put them?_ Severus Snape wondered, feeling slightly panicked. Hermione had given him a dozen of her favourite books, and although he couldn't wait to read them all, he had absolutely no idea where he could store them. He couldn't bring them back to the past with him as Myrtle would wonder why he didn't keep them in his dormitory. Despite not questioning why he chose to sleep in the bathroom every night, Myrtle was quite a nosy character. She probably assumed that Severus had fallen out with his Slytherin friends, and that he was no longer welcome in their dormitory.

Severus couldn't hide the books in the future because if Hermione were to find them she would be incredibly confused, and she might find out something she shouldn't.

They were both sitting in the library and Hermione had quickly gone off to fetch her quill to do some homework that had been set at the end of term, that she'd left in her dorm. She'd told Severus about how she hated being there- Lavender woke up late and spent most of her time in the dorm. This meant that Hermione couldn't relax and read if she didn't feel like arguing. Which of course she didn't.

Meanwhile, Severus was trying to think of where he could store the enormous pile of books, where he could easily access them. He spent a few minutes thinking of various places, and then shaking his head as he realised it wouldn't work. A few minutes later, Hermione remerged with a quill in hand. She was red-faced, and Severus suspected she'd had a run in with Lavender.

"What happened?" He asked her, as she sat down. She shook her head, and started writing on the parchment.

He touched her arm gently, which made her look up.

"You can tell me, you know."

Again she shook her head. "It doesn't matter."

Although Severus had promised himself to be understanding, and not force her to say anything she didn't want to, he knew how bad it could be to bottle everything up inside. _Just look at me,_ he thought.

"You shouldn't keep everything locked away, Hermione. It's not good for you." He advised her kindly.

"It _really_ doesn't matter." She told him sternly.

Severus nodded, giving up. Instead of asking her to tell him, he thought she'd appreciate a hug.

"Come here." He said, stretching his arms out wide.

She looked up and then considered for a moment. "I don't even think a hug will make me feel better…" She said, but she got up to hug him back anyway.

But it did make her feel better. All the comebacks she had thought up in her head in response to what Lavender had just yelled at her slowly faded, and she concentrated on Tobias' warm embrace.

"Better?" Severus asked, smiling.

"Better." She agreed. She then picked up one of the books laid on the table. "Have you started reading any of them? I was gone for ten minutes!" She laughed.

"No." Severus replied guiltily. "I was just…thinking." He responded.

"About what?" Hermione asked him. "What they've cooked for lunch? Because I am."

Severus rolled his eyes whilst grinning. " _No._ " He said. "There are thoughts other than food that circulate my mind. Maybe you should take note."

Hermione pretended to be shocked. "Tobias! You are _incomprehensibly rude_!" She giggled. "You should learn some manners and take note from _me._ " She teased him.

He smiled at her for a moment, and she could feel the intensity of his gaze making her cheeks warm up.

"What were you actually thinking about?" She asked him, in wonder.

"Well…about you actually." Severus replied. Although he _had_ been thinking about books, Hermione had also sprung into his mind.

The confession made her smile. "What about me?" She asked, looking at him intently.

"About how lucky I am to have you." Severus said honestly. "This holiday would be dreadful without you."

Hermione's eyes then began to water slightly, and Severus immediately began to wonder if he'd said something wrong.

"That's the nicest thing someone's ever said to me." Hermione smiled, wiping at her tears.

"Well then I'm glad I said it." Severus responded joyfully.

The moment was perfect; they were both happily grinning at each other and his hand quickly found hers. When she gripped his hand he felt that familiar electric spark- the one that made his heart run madly.

And then, the moment was ruined by Severus' every-worrying mind. _What if future me will come here?_ He thought. Now that it was the holidays, the old Severus was more likely to walk about rather than stay cooped up in his office marking papers all day long.

"How come you never come down for breakfast?" Hermione asked suddenly, giggling about how he was frantically looking about. "Do you get up really late?"

 _Actually I get up rather early,_ Severus told her in his head.

"Does Professor Snape eat breakfast early during the holidays?" He asked Hermione.

"Well, yes. He's usually the first one there, actually."

Severus nodded, he thought as much. He had always been an early riser, just like Hermione, although he didn't know that of course.

"You see that's why." Severus replied, as if that explained everything. He then went back to reading the book; his index finger tracing every word he read.

Hermione looked at him blankly, waiting for an explanation. When one never came she raised her hands in an irritated way.

"Tobias! That didn't explain anything! What's wrong with Professor Snape? He's really nice! The only person he isn't that nice to is Harry, and even then he gives him some sweets if he's brewed something correctly."

Severus raised his eyebrows; his actions now were affecting his future self. It was both strange and marvellous at the same time. At least _"Grumpy Me"_ wasn't _that_ grumpy anymore.

"Well you see Hermione…" Severus said as he started thinking an excuse up in his head. "You may have the impression that I do well in _all_ my subjects. But actually…you are mistaken."

Hermione thought for a second. " _Oh!_ You're not good at potions. Have you not done one of the homework's that he's set? He will get annoyed at you for that." Hermione commented thoughtfully as she thought back to the time when Neville had forgotten to do his Potion's homework. Snape, whilst for the most part a pleasant man, was not happy at all.

"Yes! Yes that's it." Severus replied, relieved she had thought of an explanation for him.

"Well then do your homework, you silly boy!" She chuckled, reaching her hand out to ruffle his hair. It had grown a bit more since the first time she had seen him, but she liked it a few centimetres longer. She wondered what he would look like with shoulder length hair, and the thought made her giggle a bit. It would make him look like Professor Snape!

"I'd rather do yours. It's so much easier." Severus grinned at her, making her shake her head.

"I'll have you know that I do _extra_ homework, that is of the standard of seventh-years."

Severus grimaced. "Don't give me those to do, then."

Hermione continued to read and Severus finished correcting Hermione's essay, which he thought was, although very good, not sufficient enough for a top grade. When he told her this, she looked offended.

"I always get the top grade, Tobias!" She huffed.

He smirked; her sudden frustration amused him.

"Fine, okay then! It's brilliant." He backtracked, although she ignored him.

He was about to ask her something when in flew a snow white owl, carrying a letter.

"Hedwig!" Hermione gasped. "This must be Harry." She said as she took the letter from Hedwig's beak.

Severus noticed that Hermione seemed tense when opening the letter, although he couldn't imagine why. Harry was one of her best friends.

Hermione's forehead creased in concentration as she read the letter, and it reminded Severus of the first time he had seen her, reading that huge book by the lake. The thought made him smile.

"Good news?" Severus asked, trying as hard as he could to not look at the letter himself. She was holding it out open, and so he could've have easily have read it if he wanted. But he figured Harry might've written things Hermione wouldn't want him to know about.

" _Well…_ " Hermione said after a while. She had folder the letter and put it in her bag.

"Is everything okay?" Severus asked, hoping Harry hadn't insulted her or something. If Harry had accused, her of telling Umbridge about DA he wouldn't be so kind as not to interfere _then_.

Hermione shrugged her shoulders, and he could tell that she was trying not to show any emotion. "It's all good." She managed to squeak.

"Do you need another hug?" Severus asked, hoping it would make her feel better again.

"No. No, just hold my hand." She asked him, and he gripped her hand tightly in response.

Severus happily obliged, and again noticed how her touch made him feel all jumpy. _I'm never going to get used to this!_ He thought, and then sadly realised it had two meanings. He was never going to get used to the loved-up feeling because it was the first time he'd ever experienced it, but also because he wasn't going to stay with her. He would never get a chance to get used to it.

He looked away from her miserably, annoyed at his thoughts. Why did his brain have to go and ruin everything? Severus was lucky, however, that he had decided to turn his head and look at the library entrance as in walked Professor Snape.

 ** _Shit!_** Severus thought. Despite not wanting to, he tore his hand from Hermione's and ran behind a bookshelf. What was going to happen to him now? He couldn't stop panicking- was it all going to end?

Hermione watched, puzzled, as Tobias ran behind the bookshelf. She then saw Professor Snape approach her, and figured that the Potion's master was looking for Tobias to shout at him, or put him in detention.

"He's not here." Hermione told Snape, as the professor looked at her in a confused way.

"Who's not here?" Snape asked, looking around.

"Tobias." Hermione answered simply. "That's who you're looking for, isn't it? He's probably in his dormitory, so you can find him there. Don't be too harsh on his detention, though, Sir. I know he hasn't done his homework but he's awfully busy, you see." She tried to be as convincing as possible.

Snape looked at her wonderingly for a second before his eyes widened suddenly and his hands shot up in front of his face. He stared at them intently, as if he was worried they were going to disappear. The thought made Hermione smile inwardly.

Meanwhile Severus was experiencing the exact same thing. He stared at his hands, making sure they were still there. That he was still there. That he was alive. His future self had knowledge that he was there. So why wasn't he disappearing? Perhaps his future self didn't know _exactly_ where he was. Perhaps the fact that Hermione had told him that he was in his dorm meant that because he was actually in the library, his future self did not really know in where in fact he was.

Whatever the reason, he was glad he was still breathing.

"I…thank you, Miss Granger." Snape said, with his eyebrows furrowed. He looked unsure of himself, as if he didn't know what his next actions should be.

"I'll be going to find him." Snape said as he hurried out of the library. Hermione hoped he wouldn't be too annoyed when he found the dorm empty, with no Tobias.

"Tobias!" She hissed at him. "You have _got_ to start doing your Potion's homework!"

Severus walked out from behind the bookcase, dazed. He felt light-headed, and couldn't think straight.

"Yeah, I know." He managed to reply.

He could _not_ afford to let that happen again. They'd have to meet outside the grounds, out of sight of his future self. It was the only way he would survive, Severus thought as he went to sit back down next to Hermione.

"I can always help you." She told him smugly.

He shook his head smiling, and began to ask her for help. And she helped him with all the seventh year Potion's syllabus questions although he knew the answer to every single one.


	22. A Chat with Professor Snape

**Chapter Twenty-Two: A Chat with Professor Snape**

* * *

Hermione woke up early at five-thirty, and although this was unusual, she hadn't actually been able to enjoy the morning these past few days- mostly due to her _lovely_ roommate. Normally she would try and get her schoolwork done before breakfast, but today she had nothing to do. Tobias had forcefully completed the homework she hadn't yet got onto, and now she was homework-less. This was strange for Hermione as she _always_ had something to do. But not today. She decided to go for a walk around the grounds of Hogwarts as she loved the feeling of a fresh spring morning. The grass had sprouted beautifully from the earth, and the ground was no longer a dull brown colour, but now a vibrant green. Daisies appeared every now and then which reminded Hermione of when she would make daisy chains with her friends at Muggle school. The weather was a little warmer now and she no longer felt the need to bring her beloved Gryffindor scarf. However, it was still much too cold to leave her dormitory without a coat, and she had consequently thrown on her favourite winter coat that was a deep red and had a fluffy hood.

The two hours quickly passed and Hermione found herself rushing to get to the Great Hall so that she could eat some breakfast. When she walked in, she saw that there was hardly anyone there- just two first years on one tables and Professor Snape on the other. It was quite early and most of the students who stayed during the holidays ate breakfast earlier- but she had always loved eating breakfast early. It energised her for the day. She didn't mind sitting by herself but as she saw Professor Snape eating his toast, she couldn't help feeling sorry for him. He looked incredibly lonely- it seemed as if all the other teachers were late risers too. It was surprising- Hermione always saw her Potion's master someone who would stay up late, certainly not an early bird. But there he sat indulging in his breakfast.

So she decided to sit with him at the table. Although it was the table for teacher's, no one was sat there so she didn't think she could be told off. Besides, it was the Easter holidays- surely she couldn't get detentions out of term time?

Snape was very surprised when he saw his best fifth year student sit on the bench directly opposite him. Why was she sitting at the teacher's table?

"Hello." Hermione greeted him shyly.

"Good morning, Miss Granger." Snape replied in an enthusiastic tone. He was not going to complain- she was extremely pleasant. And added to the fact that he had once been close to her…

Hermione reached out her hand for the milk pitcher to pour into her cereal bowl, when Snape reached for it at the same time to give it to her. Their fingers' met and they both felt some sort of electric current pass through them. Hermione's eyes widened- it felt just like when Tobias held her hand, or touched her cheek. She blushed, and looked down at her cereal. Snape placed the milk pitcher next to her quietly, and she thanked him whilst still looking down.

What was happening? Surely she couldn't be thinking of her Potion's professor in _that_ way. It was just wrong! Besides, she liked Tobias.

Hermione then plucked up the courage to look back at him, and she saw that he was looking straight at her. He wore that expression again- the one that seemed as if he recognised her from a long time ago and was reminiscing something. He gave her a gentle smile and she found herself smiling back.

"Hermione." Snape said. "Tell me, how have your classes been going this term?"

Hermione racked her brains- how _were_ her classes going? She couldn't think straight- Snape's presence distracted her too much. _Why was this happening?_ He had never distracted her before. But now suddenly- she was a mess, and couldn't even form a coherent sentence.

"Well…I mean…Potion's is going well." She joked nervously.

Severus chuckled.

"Because I have a great teacher." Hermione continued, hoping that would make him smile. Indeed, it did.

"Thank you, Hermione."

Hermione then thought to ask him about Tobias, as she knew he had been meaning to ask Snape for some extra lessons. Well, after she had forced him give in to the idea, she thought with a grin.

"Sir, I was wondering…" She started.

"Yes?" Snape asked, wondering.

"If I could ask you for a favour. Well, not really me. It's more for my…friend. Tobias Prince. You teach him, don't you?" When they had met in the library her professor had seemed quite distracted, and she wondered if he even knew Tobias took Potions.

Snape seemed as if he was about to laugh at an inside joke, but tried to contain himself. "Yes, I teach him." He replied.

 _What is he laughing about?_ Hermione wondered. Tobias must be _really_ bad at Potions!

"Could you possibly give him extra lessons over this holiday? He worries that he's really behind, and I want him to do as well as possible…"

Snape picked up his glass full of pumpkin juice and drank it slowly, as if to stop him from obviously laughing. Was Tobias really that hilarious? As Snape grasped the glass in his hand, Hermione noticed that his hands looked very nice- just like Tobias'! In fact, Snape reminded her a lot of Tobias- many of his mannerisms were the same and he had the same sense of humour. Even his features seemed similar. No wonder she was getting all nervous- he reminded her of _him!_

Once Snape had finished his juice, he looked at Hermione for a moment. "I'll see if I can." He answered her, the hint of a smile still lingering on his face.

"Oh, thank you!" Hermione exclaimed. "I worry about Tobias sometimes!" She laughed.

Snape laughed too, and then decided to ask her a question. "Forgive me if this seems intruding…but Tobias Prince is in seventh year."

Hermione realised that this was the first time someone other than Tobias had told her he was in fact in seventh year. So he wasn't lying! It put her at ease, knowing he had been truthful to her.

"Yes." Hermione responded, what was her Potion's master getting at?

"And you two are…well aquatinted? You are friends?" Snape asked, looking at her intensely.

"Well yes…friends…I guess." Hermione said hesitantly.

"Girlfriend?" Snape asked suddenly, causing Hermione to nearly fall off her seat.

"I'm sorry. I'm intruding!" Snape said as he saw her distress.

Hermione shook her head. "No it's fine. But…yes. I think I am. Well, I hope!" She smiled.

Snape nodded, seeming satisfied.

"See, the thing is I don't really know." Hermione didn't know why she was relaying all this information to the Slytherin Head of House, but she didn't have anyone else to confide this to. Not with the letter she'd received yesterday from her dear friend, Harry Potter. He'd made it quite clear that they weren't on good terms, she thought to herself bitterly. "I know Tobias likes me back but we haven't really had that conversation yet. I think he's scared of what people will think- considering he's eighteen. You know he told me he was in sixth year the first time we met?" Hermione giggled. "Because he thought I wouldn't want to be friends with him otherwise! He's very silly!"

Snape looked at her and smiled. He was glad to know that he would always be able to see Hermione, _his_ Hermione as the person he had once been with. Even if she didn't know it, just speaking to her was enough. And to see that she was talking about him in such a happy tone made him feel even better. Only Hermione would be recounting this sort of affair to a teacher- which is why he liked her so much. She was so unique, so special.

"Maybe he was intimidated by you?" Snape suggested, to which Hermione shook her head and laughed.

" _Intimidated_? By _me_?" She asked, baffled.

"Yes." Snape replied observingly. "You have very intimidating eyes." He looked deeply into said eyes, and she found herself blushing again. The electric current had resumed and she now found herself looking deeply into his dark eyes.

"Like you, then." Hermione said. "Your eyes can be very intimidating, too."

"Yes." Snape said thoughtfully. "Like mine."

It was only after she had left the Great Hall that Hermione realised Snape hadn't called her 'Miss Granger', but Hermione instead. That was odd, but she couldn't deny the fact she liked it. Hermione sounded nice on his lips, she thought.


	23. End of Holidays

**Chapter Twenty-Three: End of Holidays**

* * *

 _(Mid-way through April, day before the start of Summer term at Hogwarts, 1996)_

Unfortunately, the holidays passed relatively quickly for Hermione. She had spent a large majority of her time with who she knew as Tobias, and had thoroughly enjoyed it. They had gone strolling around the school grounds and she had found out that Tobias was rather fond of walking, and so the pair took promenades around the lake, whilst talking to one another. After the library incident, Tobias had pleaded that they did not meet inside the castle as he was afraid he might bump into Professor Snape and that he would get a detention. Hermione had informed him of her little breakfast meeting with the Potion's master, and that she'd asked him if he could give Tobias a few extra lessons. She'd left out _some_ parts of the encounter though, of course.

" _I asked him if he could give you some extra help, you know, because you're not too goo-"_

" _Hermione!" Severus exclaimed, horrified. What had she done? What did this mean for him? For his future self? She was not particularly helping his constant feeling of stress, ever since the day at the library!_

" _What? You need some help, and you'll be pleased to know that he didn't seem angry at all. In fact, he was actually laughing and…" She trailed off, deciding not to tell what else he had done. For some reason she didn't think Tobias would be too thrilled at the fact Snape had addressed her by Hermione, instead of Miss Granger._

" _He was laughing, was he? That's so embarrassing Hermione!" Severus cringed, but whether or not it really was embarrassing did not particularly bother him. It was more so the fact that his future self was becoming more and more aware of him. Severus had no idea what impact that could have. However, he was still alive and breathing so no serious harm was done. After a few minutes of reflection, whilst simultaneously playfully arguing with Hermione that she had indeed brought upon him the greatest of all embarrassments, he realised that his future self must know of him time-travelling anyway. Because he was in his real future universe, and not an alternate one, it meant that 'Grumpy Me' was his actual future and so 'Grumpy Me' would have experienced all that Severus was experiencing right now. It was very confusing, but it brought sense to certain things. Why Snape had laughed at Hermione for suggesting he give Severus extra lessons, for example. Snape would find it hilarious that Hermione would ask him such a thing, when he had in fact become Hogwarts' Potion master. It would also amuse Snape that Hermione was asking him that as a result of his younger self explaining why he couldn't be seen by the professor. Severus then mused on the fact that his future self wasn't really grumpy at all nowadays, and decided to re-name him 'Amused Me', for his future self was certainly amused._

Hermione wondered what Tobias would say if she told him he looked just a little bit like their Potion's professor. He would most likely be hugely offended, she thought. But Hermione didn't see it as an insult. She rather liked the appearance of tall raven-haired man. Not that she would outwardly admit it, of course.

Tobias had also given other reasons for them to meet outside the grounds, for example: that spring had arrived, and only a fool would not go and appreciate it; that soon the holidays would be over and it would shortly be time to revise for the exams in May, and so they would hardly have time to go outside; that the Womping Willow was thriving, and looked best at this time of year (although Hermione secretly disagreed- it looked its best in the summer, right before they left Hogwarts for the holidays); that she had finished all of her homework, albeit with his help, and so she could spend her time doing what she liked; and finally that he knew she loved nature and that she was happiest when she was amongst the grass and the trees. To which, she could not deny. And so they spent their days walking along the paths, pointing out the new species of magical birds that only appeared in spring, and running down to the closest tree when it began to lightly rain, which Tobias pointed out was the reason the month of April was commonly referred to as _'April Showers'._

It had been a great time; she had properly relaxed and enjoyed herself and hoped she could say the same for Tobias. Their relationship had blossomed further in the past two weeks, admittedly much faster than the month and a half they had known each other, and now she couldn't imagine waking up and not going to see him. The past two weeks had been enough to make her fully realise just how much she liked Tobias, and now she felt quite nervous around him. He still made her feel comfortable and welcome, but she was more aware of herself now.

She had spent the time she wasn't with Tobias looking for clues as to who could have possibly snitched about Dumbledore's Army. She had spent a good hour staring profusely at the jinxed parchment, making sure it hadn't been anyone who was part of the organisation. She had tried to find some of those who were part of the group, but they had all gone away for the holidays. So, she hadn't made much progress at all. Which didn't help her very much with the Lavender situation, which is the next thing Hermione spent a large amount of time doing: arguing with the girl.

When Hermione had left the library after she had received the letter from Harry, she had gone back to her dormitory to store it in her drawer as she didn't really want to leave it somewhere in case someone might read it. She had walked into the dormitory and went to close the door when she felt something being snatched out of her hand.

" _Ooh, what's this?" Lavender cried as she waved the letter in her hand._

" _Give it back!" Hermione screeched; she was_ not _going to read that, if she had anything to do with it!_

 _Hermione ran forward but Lavender had already jumped onto the bed. She held her wand in her other hand and warned Hermione not to act, or else she would act back. She then started reading the letter._

" _To Hermione, I'm not supposed to be speaking to you but I've heard some rumours that leave me no other choice. Apparently you were the one who told Umbridge about DA, and I can't believe it. But it makes too much sense, and people have been saying that when Umbridge brought you in her office she made a deal with yo-"_

" _Stop!" Hermione bellowed, raising her wand and yelling, "Expelliarmus!"_

 _But Lavender was quick to react, and easily deflected the spell. "- believe the scars on your hand are fake, and that you're on her side. There's no other way she could have found out- "Lavender continued, whilst deflected the spells Hermione was furiously sending her way._

 _How has she gotten this good? Hermione wondered. Hermione had always been the best in her class- how was Lavender beating her now?_

" _STOP!" Hermione screamed, and she realised why she couldn't beat Lavender. She was defeated, inside. She had been defeated, since the day Harry had sent the letter. It had been a confirmation that everyone in the group was against her. And it sucked the life out of her. That was why she loved to spend so much time with Tobias as he restored the feeling of wellbeing in her._

Hermione opened her drawer and looked at the torn letter. Once Lavender had finished reading it, she had gleefully left the room. In a fit of rage, Hermione had ripped the letter to shreds. She didn't regret doing so, however. It wasn't the sort of letter she'd want to read again.

Hermione pushed the torn pieces aside in the drawer, and picked up another letter, that was still fully intact. This was what confused her. The letter had been from Harry, too. And yet it read nothing like the first. She opened up the letter, and sat on her bed to re-read it.

 **Hermione,**

 **I'm sorry. I was so stupid, and I don't care what Ron has to say. Can we be friends again?**

 **Harry**

The letter had arrived the day before, ten days after the first. This puzzled Hermione greatly, and she had decided to ask him about it when he came back to school, which was tomorrow. For now, however, she picked up her coat to go and see Tobias, and enjoy the last day of Easter with him.


	24. Back

**Chapter Twenty-Four: Back**

* * *

 _(Beginning of Summer term in April, 1976)_

They were back. Much to Severus' distress, they were back. The Hogwarts train had promptly arrived and the thestrals had brought the carriages along to the gates of Hogwarts castle. With _them_ inside.

Severus was devastated. He'd very much enjoyed the luxury of not hiding away in a girls' lavatory. During the Easter holidays, he'd slept in his alternate self's bed in the dormitory every night which had made him dearly miss his dormitory. _Why Dumbledore? Why did you put me in this situation?_ He blamed Dumbledore again.

As a consequence of sleeping in the dormitory, he hadn't seen Myrtle as much. Therefore, he visited her a few times throughout the holiday, much to her joy. She had asked him if he was friends with Avery and Mulciber again to which he cleverly denied. Severus was originally going to answer yes, to explain why he was sleeping back in the dormitory but he then remembered that one day the holidays were going to be over and that he would have to sleep in the lavatory again. So he answered no and told her that both of them had gone away on holiday. Myrtle had nodded cheekily.

So there he was, watching _them,_ a.k.a Potter, Lupin, Black and Pettigrew. They were laughing together, whilst dragging their trunks. He saw other students walking to the castle together, and started searching for other Severus. He was alone, presumably. He squinted his eyes, as it was quite dark and it was difficult to make people out. He finally saw his other self, whose hair hung limply at his ears. Severus ran his fingers through his own hair and realised it reached the top of his ears. _I have to cut my hair,_ he reminded himself. Other Severus could walk around with hair like that, but he couldn't.

A wave of pity suddenly hit Severus as he thought of what other Severus' holiday must have undoubtedly been like. Terrible. Tobias Snape had probably spent the entire time yelling at him, and maybe even hit him. _Maybe I should thank Dumbledore,_ Severus thought. It wasn't as if his real life that he would be otherwise living was that great, either. For instance, he wouldn't have Hermione. And she made his life a million times better, without exaggeration. The past two weeks of his life were probably the best he'd ever experienced. If not, definitely in the top three, he decided. He had found out a lot about her in the past fortnight: that she had a cat called Crookshanks that she had bought at age eleven, whom she loved dearly.

" _Ron despises him, you know." Hermione laugh for a moment, until her expression turned into one of melancholy._

 _Severus knew that her and Ron weren't on good terms, so he changed the subject quickly._

That her parents were dentists, and she smiled when he told her he already knew what a 'dentist' was.

" _Oh. It's just that no one seems to know what they are around here." She explained, giggling._

" _Well, my father is a Muggle. So I know quite a bit about them." Severus smiled at her._

 _Of course, his father had never brought him to a dentist. Severus had lived like an abandoned child until the age of eleven._

That she was a fan of a Muggle pop group called _'ABBA'._

" _ABBA?" Severus repeated, not recognising the name._

" _Yes. Haven't you heard of them? They're really famous. I mean, I know it's music from the 70s but today's music is just terrible. Like the Backstreet Boys, ugh!" Hermione said, although she didn't think he listened to Muggle music. Perhaps he didn't listen to music at all._

" _Tell me one of their songs." Severus said, hoping he might have heard one of them. If it was music from the 70s, he had a much higher chance of knowing them compared to 90s music._

 _Hermione frowned, thinking. "Hmmn, let's see. There's_ 'SOS', _which I absolutely love, and then there's_ 'Money, Money, Money' _which is also fantastic. Oh and there's_ 'Mamma Mia' _! How could I forget about that one?"_

 _Severus had never heard of the songs, but enjoyed watching Hermione tell him about them in excitement._

All in all, Severus had found out a lot about her, all of which he found very interesting. He was just sad that the holidays had come to an end. Of course, he could always use the time-turner to go backwards in time to the start of the holidays, but it was just confusing about what to say to Mytrle. And he could travel to the future when the holidays had just started, but that again would be confusing as he wouldn't know what he'd already told Hermione. So he decided to just carry on time-travelling further into the future each time. He had to time-travel there as much as he could so Hermione wouldn't be suspicious if she couldn't find him.

" _Oi, Snivellus! Had a good holiday?" James Potter yelled._

Severus looked up from the bush and saw his other self flinching at Potter's words.

" _Did you finally get a chance to wash your hair?" Sirius asked, joining James in humiliating the other Severus._

" _It doesn't look like it, does it Sirius?" James replied, grinning._

Severus watched as his other self tried to ignore the two boys, and realised he couldn't take it. He ran from the bush into the darkness, heading to the lavatory. At least there he wouldn't hear James' voice. His horrible, snooty, arrogant and disdainful voice that caused him so much pain.


	25. Keeping the Promise

**Chapter Twenty-Five: Keeping the Promise**

* * *

 _(End of April, 1996)_

Professor Snape sat on his bed. He had just finished eating his dinner in the Great Hall, and had slowly walked to his own room. Today had been a difficult day. That was normal- there were always some days that were harder than others. Some days where it was much tougher to cope with it, or cope without, rather. Without her.

Some days he would sit at his office for hours and wonder how his life had turned out the way it had. On his own. The only reason he was still alive was because of him. Because of Lily- he still loved her. That was his purpose; that was the promise he had made to Dumbledore. Oh, but sometimes, keeping that promise was the most difficult task. He didn't want to do it anymore.

She had changed him for the better. He remembered the first time he had time-travelled and seen his future self, with his frightening demeanour and sneering tone. And when Hermione had asked him if anybody really _liked_ Professor Snape, it had struck a chord in him. So when he finally became a teacher at Hogwarts, he was as kind to students as possible as he remembered Hermione's words in his head. However, he couldn't help feel a slight resentment towards Harry. He was the reason that he still had to live, after all. The whole of Severus' life was _for_ him. And he hated it; all he wanted was to have a happy ending with the girl he loved. But as were most of the things Severus wished for, it was impossible.

She had given him happiness, albeit for a short while. But it had been the best happiness, the purest happiness. And he wouldn't change that for the world. Sometimes, he would find himself staring at her in his lessons, to the point where he could feel tears welling up in his eyes. He missed her, so much. He hated to think about the day he had last seen her as a sixteen-year-old. The memory was too painful.

Severus then got up from his bed and slammed his fist into the poster of his bed, which left his knuckles red and sore. _Of course it would never work,_ Severus told himself bitterly. _She would never like me now._ Severus had previously hoped that even if he couldn't be with Hermione as a sixteen-year-old, he could be with her in the future. Even if he was much older, if she liked him then, perhaps she would like him now? Severus shook his head at the thought. He was furiously angry at himself for thinking up such a ludicrous idea. How could anybody even give him a second glance, with the way he was now? With his greasy long hair and lifeless eyes. _Although…_

Severus thought back to the morning Hermione had sat with him to eat breakfast. She hadn't seemed that disgusted by him then. But that was hardly a sign of encouragement. So, Severus had given up. Instead of hoping, he spent his days reminiscing. Reminiscing every conversation, they'd ever had, every touch they'd every shared- although there were hardly any. He hadn't even had the chance to kiss her, Severus reminded himself in anguish.

He was brought out of his thoughts from a frantic knocking at the door. Severus sighed, couldn't he just be left alone? But he forced a smile on his face, as that was the right thing to do. Hermione had taught him that.

"Yes?" Severus asked pleasantly as he opened the door to reveal Professor McGonagall. "Has there been more commotion in the Slytherin common room?"

McGonagall shook her head. "No Severus. It's much worse than that."


	26. Polyjuice Potion

**Chapter Twenty-Six: Polyjuice Potion**

* * *

 _(End of first week of Summer Term in April, 1976)_

"You and your friends are not playing around with _Polyjuice_ _Potion,_ are they Severus?" Myrtle inquired in a giggly tone, with a knowing smirk on her face.

Severus looked up from his duvet cover, wondering what on earth Myrtle was going on about. He missed sleeping in the dormitory. There, at least, he was left in peace.

"You know, you can always tell me." Myrtle floated beside him on the mattress he had somehow brought to the lavatory, using the floating spell. And with the help of Myrtle acting as his partner-in-crime, to notify him if someone was coming in the corridor. He had stolen the old mattress from the Room of Supplies; barely anyone ever set foot in that place. The mattress wasn't the most comfortable, but it was better than the rock-hard floor of the lavatory.

"Myrtle- I have no idea what-"

"Oh I love an adventure!" Myrtle winked at him. "Come on Sevvy, be a nice boy. Tell me what you're planning!"

Severus let slide the fact she called him Sevvy. It was not like she called him _Sev,_ and somehow the fact that only Lily called him that didn't seem that important anymore. Also the fact that she was really alternate universe Myrtle meant that he couldn't be annoyed at her -maybe other Severus let her call him that. He had no idea.

"Mytrle." Severus said. "What have you been seeing?" Maybe if she told him things instead of out rightly accusing him, they would be on the same page.

"Someone's been stealing your hair!" She giggled. "Brewing the potion and then pretending to be you! Although I don't see why anyone one would want- I mean- you're not-"

Thankfully she stopped talking and gave Severus time to think. _Pretending to be him?_ After a few more seconds the obvious answer hit Severus straight in the face, much like one of James' punches. She was talking about other Severus! Maybe _he_ was actually other Severus in this world. The thought frightened him, and occupied his mind. He hadn't even noticed Myrtle's borderline offensive comment on how she wondered why anyone would want to pretend to be him.

 _Instead,_ thoughts of anger blossomed in his mind. Thoughts of unreliability, thoughts of carelessness. Thoughts about Dumbledore. Severus blamed him. He blamed him for the terrible situation he was in! Mytrle had noticed that there were two different Snapes- and she had assumed one of his friends had taken Polujuice Potion and pretended to be him, for a laugh. But what if she realised that she was wrong- and that actually _this_ Severus had time-travelled? What would happen to him when she had gained knowledge that he had time-travelled? Dumbledore hadn't told him _anything_! He had left him utterly alone, to time-travel between realties, one that wasn't his though at the correct time, and one that was his, but in the future! _Great!_

Those Ministry tests hadn't prepared him one bit- they hadn't even mentioned the alternate universe. _Dumbledore_ was the only one who had explained that to him! But what if the entirely trustworthy Headmaster had got it wrong? Did he have to live his life until someone found out- and what then? Or was he expected to live his life in the shadows? _**What then?**_

The full realisation of the reality of his future dawned on Severus and made his gut feel like it was turning inwards on itself. He had been trying to bury down the fact he was stuck in the wrong universe and/or timeframe by visiting Hermione so much- in the last month he had visited her almost every day. She made him feel relaxed, well _sort of_ , and at least made him totally forget about his problems. He helped her with all her classes, although she rarely needed it. But without classes of his own, Severus was bored. He missed the challenge of classwork, and the satisfied feeling of having completed it. He frequently begged Hermione to let him do hers, although he was afraid she would think him strange. But she just laughed and told him to complete his own, to which he replied, or _lied_ rather, that he had already done it. Severus hated lying to her, but had to frequently, albeit over insignificant things. For example, when she asked him what he was doing in his D.A.D.A class, he would say something he was pretty sure was in the advanced class syllabus, the one he would have been taking next year. He always spoke convincingly and so Hermione never wondered about the truth to his words, and yet the guilt was tearing him apart. And then there was the time he had to lie about something _big._ She'd gone to find him one day and realised he wasn't in Slytherin- or in sixth year for that matter. Hermione had asked him if she could call him _'Toby'_ as a little nickname instead of Tobias, and it would have been flattering if it had been his _real name!_ Now, he hated the nickname and inwardly sighed every time she would use it, although he knew it was a sign of endearment. The _fact_ that she called him by a nickname that no one else did made him feel special, and overjoyed, but he just wished he could tell her his real name. What he would give for her to call him _'Severus',_ he thought unhappily and he played back the memory in his mind.

" _Tobias!" Hermione exclaimed, the hints of annoyance clouding over her general feeling of happiness and amusement. "Stop trying to do my homework!"_

" _But I'm bored!" He protested, although he most certainly was not bored. Bored didn't correlate with a racing heart, a scattered mind and an overworking thought process. It was almost ironic how just as Severus was getting to know Hermione better, the effect she had on him took a complete one-eighty. Instead of calm and ease, he now felt nervous and on-edge. He was so aware of her; it was almost as if he had developed a sixth sense. He was aware of every movement she made, every breath she took, every smile she smiled. It was sometimes a good thing, however, being so aware. He would notice that sometimes when he would look at her for more than a few seconds, she would immediately blush, and when he complimented her she would pause for a second, as if replaying back what he had said in her mind. At times he would worry that she did not care for him nearly as much as he did for her. He had been so certain that he and Lily would end up together that when he had first time-travelled to the future, finding himself in Hogwarts of all places, and without Lily had shocked him to the core, and saddened him deeply. How was he supposed to have any expectations now? Sometimes he wondered what was the point of liking her, as he would never be able to be with her anyway. But then he would meet up with her, and see her beautiful smile, and her eyes, those wonderful captivating,_ 'you better not mess with me' _eyes that he adored so much, that the thought of giving up on her seemed absurd._

" _Tobias…can I call you Toby? For short?" Hermione asked him, making him jump a bit as he had delved so deep into his thoughts. She had already called him Toby numerous times, but decided to ask for approval of the nickname._

" _Of course you can." Severus replied, when actually a strong wave of sadness and powerlessness washed over his body. No, he did not want her to call him 'Toby' that sounded like a Muggle schoolboy's name, which of course it was. Severus had lost any liking he had once had for his father's name, and actually regretted choosing it. Still, the fact she wanted to call him by a nickname made his heart race faster, of which he could not possibly complain. When Lily had called him 'Sev', his silly overreacting heart had quickened in the same way, but Severus wondered how his poor heart would cope if Hermione would call him 'Sev', if he couldn't even deal with 'Toby'. He had decided to call her by a nickname, too._

" _Hermy. Or 'Mione.?" He asked her, testing each nickname out._

" _Definitely_ not _Hermy!" Hermione laughed, shaking her head. Although she had started blushing._

The thought left his mind like the flame blown out from a candle. Now that Potter was back, life was unbearable again. How many times was he going to see his other self be tormented by the popular Gryffindor? It made him sick and the only thing that made him feel better was Hermione. But then, after he returned he went back to his depressed mood as he felt hopeless- how was he ever going to leave this alternate universe? Hermione couldn't hide the fact he was lost in time forever.


	27. The Great Feast

**Chapter Twenty-Seven: The Great Feast**

* * *

 _(First day of Summer term in mid-April, 1996)_

Hermione was dreading the feast in the Great Hall that marked the start of a new term. Normally she would be ecstatic as it meant that she could be with her friends again and return to her beloved school that she had not seen for nearly a month. She would be able to get more assignments which she enjoyed completing and she would get the opportunity to fill her brain with new information- something she adored doing. But this time, it was different. First of all, she was not wholly sure how her conversation with Harry and Ron would go. She doubted it would be without awkward silences and strange glances, if there was a conversation to be had at all. Second, she had, for the first time, stayed at Hogwarts for the holidays and so the incredible feeling of returning was not one she could experience. She sincerely missed that sensation as she hadn't felt it for so long. She had been completing assignments well into the holidays and so the joyful feeling of having those to do again after not working for weeks could not be felt either. In fact, it didn't feel like the start of the new term at all.

She stood timidly at the top of the stairs when she saw the students walking in the front doors of the castle. First, she saw the first-years, and then the second-years and so on. Finally, when the fifth years began coming in she was met with the horrible sneer of Draco Malfoy.

"Well if it isn't Mudblood Granger! Her hair looks puffier this term, doesn't it? Must be the weather." He laughed, glancing at his Crabbe and Goyle to make sure they too were laughing at his joke.

Hermione rolled her eyes; he was nothing without those two losers at his side. If they didn't laugh at his jokes, no one would, and he would probably go off and cry. She ignored the dagger that had been lodged in her chest at his words- even if it was from Malfoy, the word still hurt.

She walked past him and looked around until she caught sight of Harry. He was walking with Ron, Seamus and Dean. As soon as he saw her, she could tell his face looked nervous.

"Hello, Hermione." He greeted her shyly.

Ron looked at her with a vacant expression, and Seamus and Dean were still in deep conversation about Quidditch.

"Hello, Harry." She smiled at him. "I wanted to ask you about those letters."

"Later." He told her. "Now can you help me with my trunk?"

* * *

The Great Hall was, as ever, bright and cheerful. Candles were lit and floated just beneath the grand arches of the ceiling, illuminating the room. The buzz of chatter warmed the large room and made it almost appear like a small cosy living room where everyone was sat on the sofa together, happily chatting away. The long dining tables were filled with bowls and plates of delicious food, whose aroma quickly caught the attention of Ron Weasley. Hermione was never particularly fond of Ron's eating habits and table-manners, but it had never greatly irritated her. Now, however, she couldn't stand it. Did he _have_ to eat with his mouth full? She had the misfortune of sitting opposite him, and she had Seamus and Neville by her side.

"Ron!" She scolded him; it was the first time she had addressed him since he had arrived.

" _What?!_ " He said, irritably.

"Could you _please_ chew on your food with your mouth closed? Besides, no one has started eating yet!" Ron rolled his eyes, but closed his mouth anyway.

"Well, I'm going to start eating!" Seamus said as he grabbed the bowl of spaghetti bolognaise and started serving himself.

Hermione shook her head. _Boys._

Then, the high-pitched voice of Dolores Umbridge pierced through the happy and tranquil atmosphere.

"Students!" She giggled, excitedly. "I welcome you back for a new school term. The final term, that is. I hope you've all been preparing for your examinations in May!"

Ron groaned. "I forgot about them."

Hermione looked at him incredulously. _How could he have forgotten?_ If she hadn't spent so much time with Tobias, she would have already started revising. But it didn't matter too much as she still had a lot of time to study. Besides, she knew most of the material by heart anyway.

Once Umbridge had finished her speech, everyone began to pile their plates with food. Hermione wondered how everyone was so hungry-were they all under-fed at home? Perhaps there had not been enough sweets in the trolley on the Hogwarts Train, and they were all feeling particularly ravenous.

Hermione started to eat her pea and spinach soup- she was the only one on her table who had served herself some.

"You have no taste in good food." Ron snorted as he bit into the chicken wing that he held in both hands. The sauce from the chicken wings leaked on his fingers and down his sleeves.

"As opposed to what? Greasy chicken?" Hermione retorted. Why was he always so mean? He supposedly liked her, for Merlin's sake!

Hermione then realised that Tobias must be eating somewhere in the Great Hall and so she looked around, trying to locate him. Her searching's were soon interrupted, however, when Ron had finished swallowing down the chicken and replied to her.

"I'd rather eat grease than mushy peas any day."

Hermione rolled her eyes again. "Each to their own." She murmured.

She desperately wanted to ask Harry about the letters but for some reason he had asked her to talk about it later. What was he hiding? She dipped her spoon in the soup and continued eating it, patiently waiting to find out.


	28. A Love Poem

**Chapter Twenty-Eight: A Love Poem**

* * *

 _(Summer term in April, 1996_ _)_

Once the feast was over, all the students began carrying their trunks to their dormitories in their House common rooms. Hermione bit her lip; this was her only chance.

"Harry!" She called, and she could tell that he walked over to her slowly so that when he arrived, everyone would have gone through the portrait hole.

"Sorry about that." He said, referring to how long it had taken him to get there. "I just didn't want Ron to overhear. He's still annoyed at you, you know."

The comment flew past Hermione's head.

"Why are the two letter's so different?" She asked him, studying his features in case he might lie.

But the only expression she saw on Harry's face was one of confusion.

"Two letters? No, no, no, no. I only sent one."

Hermione's eyes widened. _What?!_

"No, Harry, you sent me two letters. The first, well it wasn't too nice…" She frowned, remembering its contents.

"Hermione, I never wrote two letters. Show me them both." Harry appeared to be distressed.

"Sure, I'll be right back." She said as she started saying the password to let The Fat Lady open the door.

Realisation then hit her in the face.

"I can't give it to you Harry. I tore it up." She admitted reluctantly.

Harry looked at her in astonishment, why would she have ripped it up into pieces?

" _Why?"_ He asked her.

Hermione felt her cheeks burn in embarrassment. All of a sudden a loud voice interrupted their conversation.

"Excuse me!" The Fat Lady cried. "If you wish to enter the Gryffindor common room, then you shall have to come in at once."

Hermione sighed in frustration. "Can't you just keep the door open for a few seconds?"

The Fat Lady looked at her sternly. "No."

"Fine." Harry said as the door slammed shut behind him. "So you were saying...?"

"Because it hurt my feelings. It was in my drawer for a while but then I chucked it in the bin."

Harry nodded, still confused. "Well whatever it said, I didn't send it."

 _Then who did?_ Hermione wondered, but she was too tired to let the conversation go on any further. It was only eight-thirty in the evening but she felt like she needed to go to bed early, as tomorrow lessons were starting. She wanted to be as fully prepared as she could possibly be.

After re-saying the passwords, both Harry and Hermione entered the common room and after saying goodnight, they headed to their separate dormitories.

* * *

It was truly a blessing that Pavarti and Padma Patil had returned from their holiday as they happily conversed with Lavender as Hermione got ready for lessons. Living with Lavender only had been a nightmare. Not only did she constantly accuse Hermione of being a traitor of Dumbledore's army, but she would also mess with Hermione's things, much to Hermione's frustration. She would hide Hermione's bag, for example, and would not tell Hermione of its whereabouts until the very last second. She would frequently steal Hermione's quills and ink pots, and sometimes she would even steal Hermione's essays.

This was the reason why this morning, the first school day of the Summer term, Hermione had all of her things on her lap as she tied her hair into a ponytail. As she ran her hand across her scalp she realised there were many bumps, but she didn't have the time to cast the _Hair-flattening_ spell and so she left her messy hair alone.

"Hermione." Padma giggled. "Why are you hugging your bag?"

"I'm not!" Hermione protested. "I was just checking to see if I had all my textbooks."

"You don't." Lavender called evilly.

Hermione's heart stopped as she frantically searched her bag to check if she had all the necessary textbooks. She did.

"Don't scare me like that!" Hermione shouted at Lavender, to which she rolled her eyes.

Hermione glared at her and threw her bag over her shoulder to make her way to her first lesson, Herbology. She was the first to class, of course. She liked being the first one there as it gave her a few seconds to prepare for the class. She got out a fresh roll of parchment and neatly placed her quill and inkpot beside it, even though she suspected it was going to get dirty. It always got dirty in Herbology. Satisfied, however, she was ready for the lesson.

* * *

It was finally break time, and Hermione made her usual journey down the moving stairs of the castle to the lake. She could see Tobias sprawled on the grass beside the lake, seemingly staring at something in his hands. _He's probably checking his essay is faultless,_ Hermione thought and smiled. She felt a pang of excitement in her stomach as she approached him. She continued walking, however before she could start walking on the particular path that led down-slope to the lake, she felt a hand grab on her arm.

"Hermione!"

She turned around to see Harry panting heavily. "You walk quite fast, you know. Where are you going off to?" He asked her.

She pointed a finger to the lake. "I want to read." She lied.

"There's already someone down there. And it looks like he's taking up your favourite space." Harry said rather loudly.

To this Tobias cocked his head up suddenly, and on seeing Harry, he froze. The moment he had heard Harry had turned him rigid. This did not go unnoticed by Hermione. _I'll have to ask him later,_ she reminded herself.

"I don't mind, Harry. I like reading by the lake." She told Harry honestly, although she didn't think she would be reading much. She smiled inwardly at the thought and looked back up to Harry.

* * *

 _What is wrong with this thing?_ Severus wondered as he stared at the time-forwarder in his hands. When he had time-travelled that time, it had felt strange and... wrong. Usually he'd be suspended in the air in a swirl of colours as he went forward in time, but this time he was flying all over the place uncontrollably. It had been very strange, and a little unnerving. He was inspecting the device to see if he had damaged it in any way. But everything seemed normal. The device bore no scratch, no mark, in fact it was in pristine condition. _Dumbledore would be proud,_ he thought bitterly. Suddenly, a well-known voice brought him out of his thoughts.

" _-someone down there. And it looks like he's taking up your favourite space."_ The voice sent shivers down Severus' spine. _How?_

He looked up and indeed saw James Potter, in all his glory. How on earth was he here?! He was supposed to be thirty! But it had to be him- the boy resembled him entirely. Although _this_ James was wearing glasses. _So he didn't grow up, but his eyesight got worse?_ Severus sneered in his head.

He saw Hermione's face scrunch up in confusion, and he knew that she had seen his bizarre reaction. _Damn it!_ She was going to ask him about that later.

" _I don't mind, Harry. I like reading by the lake."_ He heard Hermione say.

 _Harry?! That was Harry Potter?_ Severus couldn't believe it. The boy was an exact replication of his father! Whoever the boy's mother was, he did not inherit _any_ of her features. Although Severus had seen him at a distance, he could have sworn the boy was James Potter. It was uncanny.

He then watched as the pair proceeded to talk more quietly, before Harry pulled Hermione's arm and they walked away. He saw Hermione turn around to look at him to whisper ' _Sorry_ ' as they left. Severus frowned in bitter disappointment. Did Harry not get to see enough of her? And since when had they become friends again? Hermione hadn't told him that. He also felt worried that Hermione didn't like him that much anymore. Even if they'd spent almost every second of the holiday together, Severus was still surprised that she liked him back. He was so unused to anyone caring about him so the idea that she would move on seemed normal, and almost appropriate too him. He wasn't that interesting after all, nor good-looking for that matter. Honestly, what did she see in him? He couldn't stop the thoughts from filling his head.

 _What am I supposed to do now?_ Severus thought. He had brought a book with him, so he could read by the lake. But he'd be finished in an hour. He reached into his pocket for a chocolate bar he had stolen from a bag he had seen in the corridor, and took a bite of it. It was gooey and delicious. Severus had originally been worried about how the state of food would be affected by time-travel. Would it go off? Would mould grown on it? So, he had brought a chocolate bar along with him to find out. But it had remained perfectly edible, and Severus had realised that it made sense. If time-travel didn't turn him into a thirty-six-year-old man, why should the chocolate bar age?

He grabbed the book and chocolate bar, leant on the grass, and started reading.

* * *

"Cho wrote me a song." Harry said, and looked at Hermione expectantly. He was met only with a blank look.

"That's nice." Hermione said; she had no idea what to say.

"Don't you want to hear it? She'll sing it again so you can hear it."

"Oh Harry, it's okay, don't worry." Hermione shook her head. She just wanted to go down to the bloody lake, for Merlin's sake!

But Harry was adamant. "No, you have to hear it!"

He grabbed her arm and pulled her away from the lake, and Hermione could only look back at a sad-faced Tobias as she whispered _'Sorry.'_

"You won't regret it, I promise!" Harry told her as they continued walking up back to the castle. Hermione could only murmur something in response. Once they arrived to the library, which Hermione was surprised to find out Cho was sitting in, she was greeted very enthusiastically.

"Oh, Hermione!" Cho exclaimed in her thick Scottish accent. "Do you want to hear it?"

"Sure." Hermione replied, taking a seat next to Harry. She noted that Ron was sitting at the table too, but he hadn't bothered to greet her.

Hermione watched as Cho took a deep breath before she started reading out the poem she had memorised. She looked straight at Harry as she read it.

"Harry, do you know that you make the sun shine brighter on the days where its gloomy?

Do you know that you write the sweetest letters that make me blush when you hand them to me?

Do you know that you can make me smile when I'm in the worst of moods?

Do you know that I prefer you to all my favourite foods?

Do you know that every morning, when I wake up for school,

That you are in my thoughts, you annoying, distracting fool!

Do you know that when I look at you, all I feel is joy,

For I am with my favourite person, the one I love to annoy.

I love you."

Harry immediately went to hug Cho and Hermione couldn't help but smile; it had been a lovely poem. She was glad she had gone with Harry to hear it.

"Oh, Cho, it's beautiful!" Hermione told her honestly.

"Thank you." Cho smiled, as she turned back to Harry to give him a kiss.

It was only then that Hermione noticed that Ron was staring at her, and had been staring at her the entire time Cho had recited the poem.

" _What?!"_ She asked him.

"Nothing." He replied nonchalantly, and he went back to scribbling something on a piece of parchment.

Hermione rolled her eyes and got up to head back down to the lake. She couldn't be bothered to deal with Ron. Hermione made a mental note to write a poem for Tobias, as she loved the idea. It had been the most beautiful thing to witness Cho nervously reading it to Harry, and Harry smiling so much his grin almost reached his ears. She wanted to do that for Toby, as she was sure he'd appreciate it. She hoped he knew how much she cared for him.


	29. Poisoned

**Chapter Twenty-Nine: Poisoned**

* * *

 _(End of April, 1996)_

The first two weeks of the Summer term passed in a blur. Hermione was kept busy with the numerous assignments she'd been set, and she also had to put aside time to revise for the fast-approaching exams in May. Apparently, teachers didn't realise that students actually have to revise, and so set them even more homework it would seem, compared to their usual workload. This meant that Hermione didn't have much time to do anything else. She could only see Tobias for half an hour a day at most, and then they would plan when they could next meet. Tobias told her he also had to revise a lot, and so even when they met up, they would revise together. Even Harry, who spent every second of his with Cho, was starting to take an hour each day to revise. By revise, however, he meant looking at a textbook with Cho sitting next to him. Hermione tried to advise him to start properly studying, but at the same time she didn't want to cause an argument. He was happiest when he was with Cho, and she didn't want to spoil that.

Ron was a completely different matter. He didn't revise at all, and then complained that he was going to fail. Ginny had shouted at him that he _was_ going to fail if he couldn't even be bothered to revise. Hermione hadn't even dared to speak to him on the matter as although they had begun talking again, albeit quite coldly, she didn't think they had resolved their friendship to the extent where she could give him advice. And so she watched him struggling over basic concepts they'd learnt over in class, and ignored the voice in her head telling her to grab the heaviest textbook she could find and whack in on his head. Perhaps then he would understand that he had to study if he wanted to pass his exams!

And there Hermione was, studying in the library, whilst her other friends chatted around her. She didn't mind too much however, as she was too absorbed in the text. Once Hermione started reading, it was difficult to get her to stop. She would shout at anyone who did, and if that person happened to be Draco Malfoy, she would even go further and pull out her wand to threaten him.

So of course, it happened that Draco Malfoy and his gang of puppets also known as Crabbe and Goyle, walked into the library that day. As soon as Draco caught sight of _Potter, Weasley,_ and _Granger,_ he confidently marched over to their table, and Crabbe and Goyle followed suit, much like a herd of sheep.

"Well look what we have here." He sneered, maliciously. "If you keep sticking your head in those books, Granger, you might just become one!" He laughed, and so did his two companions.

Hermione, who had just been intensely reading, shot him a fiery glare. "Some of us actually have to revise." She said, angrily.

Draco scratched his head, trying to appear dumb. "Oh yeah, I forgot. If you didn't spend your life studying, you wouldn't even come close to my test results. I am naturally gifted, you see." Draco leant forward until he was inches from Hermione's face. "And that means I don't need to waste my time like you."

And then, much to Draco's astonishment, she slapped him. A hard, loud, stinging ' _thwack!'_ and Draco stumbled backwards; his hand cupping his flaming-red cheek.

"Ow!" He exclaimed. "You slapped me!"

"Oh, well noticed." Hermione said sarcastically, feeling triumphant. Harry and Ron were smiling at her.

"That was great!" They both told her honestly, and Hermione smiled. It meant that Ron was becoming a little less full-of-himself and now they could actually start to get along more. Hermione noticed that Cho didn't congratulate her, instead she seemed rather frightened.

"You'll pay for that." Draco told her icily. He then glanced at Cho. "You guys still hanging out with her, huh? Funny. Thought you didn't like traitors."

Hermione could tell Cho was trying to hold back tears.

"Shut up, Malfoy!" Harry shouted at him, enraged that he was making his girlfriend cry.

"I didn't tell her anything!" Cho protested to Draco, but he only smirked at her in return.

The three Slytherins then left the room, and Harry tried to comfort Cho who was now wiping the tears from her cheeks.

"He's a stupid git, don't listen to what he says." Ron told her.

She nodded, as if she was trying to believe what he told her. "But it's not just him. Everyone thinks it." Cho muttered, miserably.

It was true; the rumour had gone round that it had been Cho Chang who had revealed DA to Umbridge, but Hermione knew it to be false. Besides, there was also the rumour that _she_ had been the traitor. How could anyone believe those silly rumours?

"Cho, don't worry." Hermione comforted her. "They're saying I was the traitor, too. Anyway, I can show them the parchment and they'll know that you weren't the traitor. I keep telling everyone that it was someone who wasn't part of Dumbledore's Army, but it seems as if people _want_ to put the blame on someone in the group."

"We know it wasn't you." Harry told her, as he stroked the back of her hand with his thumb. "And that's all that matters. We started the group, after all."

Cho sighed and thanked them for believing her. Hermione felt enormous pity for the girl- she too knew what it was like to be wrongly framed for something you didn't do. _Stupid Lavender._ That made Hermione think about the annoying girl who was currently making her life hell. She hadn't stopped in her mission to annoy the living daylight out of Hermione. Even if it was as simple as stealing the toothpaste or breaking her quill, she would do it. The girl was pathetic.

"Hermione, it's getting late. We're going to bed." Harry told her, and she watched Harry, Cho and Ron get up and collect their things. Ron didn't have anything to collect, however, as he obviously had not been revising. Hermione overlooked the detail, however, for her own sake as well as his.

"I'm just going to revise a little longer." She told them, and they said goodnight and left.

Hermione didn't particularly want to go back to her dormitory as she'd have to deal with Lavender, and she wasn't ready for that yet. Instead, she focused on studying. How was it the end of April already? The first two weeks of Summer term had gone by so quickly! And now she only had the first few days of May left until the exams would begin on May 9th. She dreaded that day, but also felt prepared. Exams were her speciality, after all.

* * *

When Hermione finally got back to her dormitory, she felt extremely tired. Revising had drained the life out of her. She murmured the password to the Fat Lady and didn't even notice the woman's frightened face. And when she walked into the common room, she didn't even realise that everyone was looking scared out of their minds. It was only when she heard a startled cry that she realised something was wrong. She looked up to see a first-year crying.

"What's wrong?" She asked her, and then she looked around at everyone. "What's going on?"

"Haven't you heard, Hermione?" Ron told her, and he looked a bit scared himself. "A student's been killed."

Hermione gasped. "Who?"

Ron shook his head, and Harry answered. "We don't know yet. But apparently a student's been poisoned."

Hermione couldn't believe her ears. Who had been poisoned? And by who?


	30. The Dark Lord's Doing?

**Chapter Thirty: The Dark Lord's Doing?**

* * *

 _(End of April, 1996)_

"A girl? _Dead?_ " Severus Snape could not quite believe it. _Not Hermione, not Hermione, not her, anyone but her,_ he pleaded in his head. He would not be able to live if she had been the one to be killed.

Minerva McGonagall nodded solemnly. "In a horrific and brutal manner, Severus. The girl died in agony whilst the venom of the rare _'Yexilus Potion'_ took over her body. She must have felt terrible pain…"

"Are you sure there is nothing I can do? Is it certain that she is gone?" He asked desperately. There had to be something- a draught, a spell, an enchantment…

"It is definite. I came only to inform you of the news." The voice of the usually strict and austere professor wobbled slightly when she spoke.

"Her name." Severus managed to get out. "What is her _name_?" He could not cope with the anxiety welling up inside him. _Was Hermione still alive?_

Minerva looked Severus straight in the eye. "Cho Chang." She said gravely.

 _Thank God, thank God, thank God, thank God._ Relief flooded through him and although he felt bad for feeling such relief on hearing the poor girl's name, he could only be thankful that it wasn't Hermione.

Severus Snape nodded miserably and then just about caught a strange look on Minerva's face. A look in which her features expressed hatred, and blame.

"And you think…that this is the Dark Lord's doing?" Severus asked her, watching her movements carefully. He could easily guess what she was thinking.

Her voice lowered down to barely a whisper. "It _has_ to be, Severus. I cannot believe the people who thinks Harry is lying and that You-Know-Who has not risen again. And I know that you believe what I do." She told him.

"Why would the Dark Lord choose to kill her? She is a pure blood- it makes no sense." Severus pondered aloud.

"She may be a pure blood, but she is close to Harry. And he needs the closest access to Harry as he can get." Minerva reminded him.

Severus frowned. It didn't make sense. "Why would he kill the girl? And with poison too? Why did he not just cast the killing spell?"

"To break down Harry's walls, Severus! Can't you see? If he gets rid of someone close to him, he's much more vulnerable. As to the method of his killing, I have no idea."

"Then this means there is an intruder on the grounds." Severus said, very matter-of-factly. "Hogwarts will have to be closed down."

"But there is no proof that it was You-Know-Who's doing! Do you honestly think that Umbrige will let the school be shut down, based on _my_ belief of who the murder was?"

"Regardless, something will have to be done. Besides, aren't you the one who fears for the students' safety? If you truly believe that the school is under threat, don't you want there to be some protection?"

Minerva appeared horrified. "Of course!" She hissed. "How could you ask such a preposterous thing?"

"I apologise, Minerva. I didn't mean to offend you. I only mean to warn you that if you do feel so strongly, you must act at once. You must convince Umbridge."

"I'll do whatever it takes to convince that bitch." Minerva said angrily.

In spite of the dreadful occurrence, Severus Snape smiled.

* * *

"Harry- Harry I'm sorry- Harry I'm so so sorry-"

"Leave me alone!" Harry yelled, scrubbing his hands to his damp cheeks.

"Harry please, let me talk yo-"

"I don't care about anything you have to say! _Leave me alone!_ " He bellowed, whilst more tears flowed from his eyes. It hurt so much, he could barely breathe.

"Harry, you've got to listen to me!" Hermione shouted at him. She had to be there for him. She thought she was having a nightmare when it was revealed at breakfast that it had been Cho Chang who was killed. Harry had ran off immediately, and she had followed him. He couldn't be alone, not at a time like this.

"NO!" Harry roared. "LISTEN TO ME!"

Hermione froze, and it was suddenly silent. They stared at each other- Harry with his red eyes and tear-stained face, holding his broken glasses in his left hand. And Hermione with her equally bloodshot eyes and damp cheeks. But he was more broken, and they both knew it.

"SHE'S GONE." He screamed at her. "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND? I BET YOU'RE HAPPY NOW! YOU'LL NEVER HEAR ME GO ON ABOUT CHO EVER AGAIN!"

He fell onto the floor in defeat. It took incredible effort for him to move towards the wall to slouch on it.

"People are saying she killed herself." Harry said after a while. "That she's the one who told Umbridge about Dumbledore's Army, and that she couldn't live with the guilt anymore."

Hermione shook her head. "No. No, that's impossible. It would have been written on the parchment."

"What if she told someone indirectly?" Harry said as more tears fell from his eyes. His voice shook unsteadily.

"Well then… I don't know." Hermione admitted. "But you think that's why? Why she's gone."

"No. I _know_ she didn't kill herself. But she might have told Umbridge something, and then that lead to someone killing her. I think it was him."

"You-Know-Who? But Harry…" Hermione started.

"I know!" He shouted at her. "Why did he not just use the killing curse? That's what I'm trying to figure out, Hermione!"

Hermione was frightened by his yelling.

"I don't think she killed herself either." She told him, hoping it would reassure him.

But he didn't even hear her. He had already left.

* * *

The Great Hall was silent. All eyes were on Dolores Umbridge, the headmistress of Hogwarts School. She rose up from her seat, and gave a sad smile to the students. Hermione did not think it was genuine. She could hardly believe that they were holding a ceremony for Cho. She could hardly believe that Cho was gone.

"It is a very sad day, today." She spoke loudly, but easily. No sadness could be detected from her voice. "It is always sad when a student chooses to leave us, for whatever reason. Miss Chang was unhappy, and why I do not know; we will never know. She chose to end her life yesterday afternoon, but we will always remember her."

Everyone was crying and snuffling around Hermione, but she could not feel anything. It was as if she was numb. She couldn't believe her ears; couldn't believe that Cho was dead; couldn't believe Umbridge was telling everyone it had been by suicide.

"SHE DIDN'T KILL HERSELF!" A voice screamed. It was the voice of Harry Potter. "IT WAS HIM! VOLDEMORT!"

"Silence!" Umbridge bellowed back, furious that someone was interrupting her very carefully planned speech.

"NO!" Harry roared back, and Hermione wondered how he hadn't lost his voice as he had been screaming for the past day and a half. "I WON'T LET YOU DISREGARD HER LIKE YOU DID FOR CEDRIC! I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY! IT WAS HIM- AND HE'S BACK. HE'S BEEN BACK FOR A LONG TIME!"

He then stormed out of the hall, his body shaking with rage and hurt. Hermione saw Ginny go after him but she doubted Harry would appreciate it. He hadn't appreciated when she had tried to comfort him.

Umbridge took a deep breath. "Mr Potter, it seems, was very attached to the girl. It is only natural he has started thinking up excuses for her suicide- perhaps he can't face the reality that he wasn't enough for her and that their relationship didn't make her happy."

Hermione clenched her fists in anger. _How dare she?!_ She didn't even address Cho by her name, and she spoke of Harry like a child? Did she have any idea of what he'd been through? Of the many near-death situations he had experienced? Situations where she would most probably have died in an instant? And worse, she was indirectly blaming Harry for Cho's death, as she was saying he didn't make her happy. If Harry was still here, he would've exploded.

The ceremony continued with Umbridge calling friends of Cho to give a speech. Marietta Edgecombe walked up first crying, and she wept about losing her best friend. It was a difficult thing to watch, and soon Hermione was crying herself. She looked back up to the stand and her eyes travelled to Professor Snape whose eyes were looking at her intently. He seemed relieved, although Hermione could not possibly understand why. Who would be relieved in a situation like this?

Eventually the ceremony ended, and the students walked back to their House common rooms quietly weeping. Nobody felt much like talking, and it was hardly surprising. As Hermione walked up the stairs from the common room to her dormitory, she heard Ron speaking to Ginny downstairs. It sounded like he was reprimanding her.

" _Why did you have to go and talk to him? Why couldn't you just of left him alone? He doesn't need you there patting his shoulder!"_

" _I just-I wanted to be there for him..." Ginny sobbed._

" _You're not his bloody girlfriend Ginny! You can't seriously think that after a day he's going to get with yo-"_

" _Ron!" Ginny shouted angrily. "How dare you! I wasn't trying to do that all! How could you say that!"_

" _Because I know you like him, and have liked him for ages. But you've got to leave him alone Ginny!" Ron shouted back._

 _Soon the entirety of Gryffindor, most likely including Harry was listening from their own dorms._

" _Shut up! I don't need advice from_ you _Ron!" Ginny screamed._

" _No wonder he pushed you! You were probably clinging onto him…"_

The conversation ended there abruptly as Ginny ran up the stairs, pushing Hermione out of the way as she did so. Hermione sighed; she knew that was going to happen. Clearly Ginny didn't know Harry well enough, despite liking him for so long. And Hermione was afraid Ginny might never know him well enough. She wasn't sure Harry would ever be the same again.


	31. Incredulous

**Chapter Thirty-One: Incredulous**

* * *

It was incredulous. Completely and utterly incredulous. Any _normal_ Headmistress with a somewhat empathetic nature, would be willing to cancel the OWLs that fifth-years would be sitting, or at least postpone them, if the circumstances meant that it would be difficult for the students to complete them. And the circumstances _were_ such! A student from sixth year had just died for Merlin's sake! Were all the fifth years expected to continue revising and sit their examinations as if nothing had happened? Were they expected to act like they weren't affected? Apparently, yes.

" _It has been rumoured that due to the recent events, fifth-years will not be sitting their OWLs, and that seventh-years will not be sitting their NEWTs later on. I have to inform you that this will not be the case. These examinations are extremely important, and cannot,_ will not _be cancelled even if the circumstances are…unfavourable, shall we say."_

Umbridge's words rang in Hermione's mind. The woman was unforgiving, and insane. She had no regard for the feelings and wellbeing of her students, and was perfectly content with forcing them to sit their examinations, even if they weren't mentally ready. Hermione expected that quite a few people in her year were going to fail, as it seems they had been close to Cho. Even those who had accused her of being a traitor were affected deeply by her death. Malfoy, of course, was handling it fine, and he would most likely get the best results in the entire year. It infuriated Hermione. How could Professor Snape not do anything? How could such a lovely man not speak up? But deep down Hermione knew the reason why. He was up against Umbridge, and no one won against her. Hermione then thought back to her second year when Professor Dumbledore had cancelled their examinations. She had been devastated as she had spent weeks studying. How she wished she could switch the years.

No one bothered to revise anymore. The first exam was tomorrow, and yet she saw no one even bothering to glance at a textbook in the Gryffindor common room. Harry was lifeless, he walked around with a blank look on his face, as if nothing mattered anymore. Hermione was deeply concerned for him- she worried he was on the verge of severe depression. The guilt of shouting to him about Cho a few weeks prior didn't help- in fact she didn't even dare to mention Cho to him. This school year had already been the worst- right from the second Umbridge walked in. But somehow, it had gotten worse. There was no hope left anymore; no joy left in their lives.

Hermione continued to revise, however, as it made her forget about everything. She knew that it seemed disrespectful to Cho as she could carry on her life as if she had ever meant anything to her, but in reality she was breaking inside. She couldn't bear to see her two best friends like this, and so she buried herself in her books to forget. The only other way she could forget was when she saw Tobias. She couldn't help but vent her frustrations to him, but he happily listened. She told him about the guilt she felt regarding Cho, but he told her that she had done nothing wrong. He told her that the only thing she could do now was be there for Harry. Hermione wasn't sure, but based on the way he said it, it seemed as if he wished someone had been there for him at some point in his life. But she didn't ask because she didn't want to pry into his life. Even if he was relaxed with her, it didn't mean he had to tell her everything. He didn't force her to tell him everything, and so she gave the same courtesy to him. Hermione then looked at her watch and realised that she was supposed to be meeting him down at the lake in seven minutes. She gathered up all her books, and made her way down there.

* * *

"Are you all right?" Severus asked her. He worried a lot about her these days. Ever since Cho had died, which he had luckily found out about when he was eavesdropping around the school, Hermione hadn't been the same. It was as if the life had been sucked out of her eyes. They weren't as observing, weren't as sharp. He knew that she was struggling to cope, and he could only imagine how difficult it could be for Harry. For the first time in his life, he felt sorry for a Potter.

"Yes, I'm okay." Hermione told him, and she quickly opened her arms for a hug. She wasn't wearing her fluffy coat anymore as the weather had gotten warmer, but she still wore her robes. The embrace brought tingles to her skin, and she happily lent into him.

"How's Harry? And Ron?" Severus whispered at her ear. Hermione loved the fact that Tobias was so caring, and that he actually worried about her friends. He hadn't stopped asking about them since Cho had died.

Hermione shook her head against Severus' shoulder.

"Ron's alright. But Harry…he's depressed. I know it." Hermione whispered sadly. "He barely eats anymore. He just sits there in his dormitory. So some days, I don't even see him."

Severus thought for a second. Maybe he could help. After all, he knew what it felt like to be depressed. He didn't think he had ever been as depressed as Harry was, but perhaps he could help him.

"Do you want me to talk to him?" Severus asked her, as he tightened their embrace.

"I don't think he wants to talk to anyone." Hermione said honestly. "I doubt he'll listen to you. But you can try. In a few days, though. Give him a few days."

Severus nodded, and loosened their embrace so he could hold Hermione's hand. He stroked his thumb over her knuckles in an attempt to make her feel calmer. It seemingly worked as she sighed and looked at him.

"Thank you. I don't know how you do it, Toby. How you stay so calm. You've got your NEWTs in two weeks, you know."

Severus smiled inwardly. _No he didn't._

"And your OWLs are starting in two days." He reminded her.

Hermione groaned. "Don't remind me!"

"I'm sure you haven't forgotten."

Hermione shrugged. Of course she hadn't. Apart from Cho and Tobias, that was the only thing on her mind.

Severus looked at her for a moment and swept a few strands of her fringe out of her eyes.

"You'll do great." He told her.

But it didn't seem to comfort her as she groaned again.

"That's the problem, though, Toby! What are people going to think? When I get good results, after Cho has died? They'll think I don't give a damn!"

"So…you're going to purposefully fail your exams…just so people know you're grieving. Sounds perfectly logical to me." Severus said, with sarcasm dripping from his words.

Hermione glared at him.

"You're so helpful."

"I know." He grinned, and went to stroke her cheek. "Look, Hermione, I understand your situation. It isn't favourable by any means. But these exams will determine the rest of your life. You can't fail them because of other peoples' opinion of you."

Hermione knew he was right, but she wasn't ready to face all the glares and mutters of disapproval she would receive. She would be as bad as Draco. The thought made her shudder.

* * *

After he had said goodbye to Hermione, Severus watched her walk away. It pained him. She seemed so sad. Was it true, what she was saying about Voldemort? That he had been responsible for her death? She had told him it was only a theory, but he too agreed that Cho didn't kill herself. Although she was heavily criticised, he knew from what Hermione had told him that she was a girl of strong character. A girl that would not go down without a fight. But he didn't know what the truth really was.

Severus took out the time-turner from his pocket, and sighed at the thought of going back to a place where he shouldn't exist. A place where James Potter existed. He sighed again, took a long look at his surroundings, at the beautifully hypnotising lake, and spun the time-turner twenty times.


	32. Bullying Snape

**Chapter Thirty-Two: Bullying Snape**

* * *

When he arrived back to the year 1976, he found himself behind a tree of all places. The Womping Willow. What was his past alternate self doing- taking a walk? The idea of doing so didn't seem so foreign to Severus now as he had regularly and happily partaken in walks with Hermione, but he doubted his past alternate self enjoyed taking a leisurely stroll- much less by himself. All of a sudden he heard some voices- voices that made the blood run cold in his veins and brought the sweat out running from his neck. _Potter._ Unlike the last time he thought he sensed Potter, this was the real one. Not his stupid doppelgänger son. This was really James Potter.

He watched from behind the tree as the gang consisting of James, Sirius, Remus and Peter started walking towards his past alternate self, who was carrying a rather heavy load of books that made up a pile that reached his nose. Other Severus seemed to be struggling with the weight of the books, and when he heard the gang of boys approaching him his face paled and he visibly gulped.

" _Struggling with all those books, Snivellus?" Sirius sneered._

Both Severus' heart jumped in unison- both thinking the exact same thing, both remembering the time Sirius had tried to kill them. Other Severus used this memory as a means to build up courage- he was _not_ going to let them walk all over him this time. Meanwhile the true Severus was bitterly remembering how Lily had said he was 'being very ungrateful' to James as he had saved his life. How little she knew! How dare she interfere, even comment on the situation! Anger built up inside of him until every cell in his being shook with rage. _She didn't know anything!_ And he had been so 'in love with her' he hadn't realised the hypocrisy of her words. How _dare_ she ask him to get the other Slytherins to stop bullying other students, when she herself dismissed his own bullied self as nothing but an ungrateful loser who should be thankful he wasn't killed.

A voice temporarily stopped the fury fuelling within him.

" _I say we give him a hand, don't you?" James winked to his friends._

Instead, feelings of sorry enveloped the anger, almost making it disappear entirely. When he himself was bullied by the gang, he only saw it from his perspective. Only saw the wands aimed at him, and the razor-sharp words that cut through his seemingly strong exterior, one that he managed to put up all the time. But even the pretend barrier couldn't stop the pain from seeping in. Now, as Severus watched his past alternate self having the books removed from his hands, up into the air and crashing back down into his face, all the doing of James of course, he felt another feeling course down his veins.

The feeling of determination; determination to get revenge. He didn't care if it was bloody alternate James or his actual self- he was going to make him pay. Pay for what he had done to him, his other self and God know how many other Severus'. Severus' whole life had been nothing but sadness. His father hated him for the obvious signs of magic he showed at an early age. A wizard father might have congratulated their child when they had shown signs of magic, and they might have even thrown a celebratory party. Severus was yelled at and was grounded for months; told bleakly by his father that if he did that again, he would be thankful for his previous punishment as the next one would be much, much worse. Of course Severus did show more signs of magic, much to his father's anger. He had even been hit, on some occasions, and his mother did nothing to stop it.

When his tenth birthday approached, Severus began to await the letter inviting him to Hogwarts; he had read a number of books on the school and couldn't wait to see the school itself. On the day of his birthday, his father found these books and grabbed him by the collar. _"Where did you find these, boy?"_ His father had snarled. Severus hadn't dared tell him the truth, that his mother had given them to him after he had found them in the basement, and instead lied, mumbling about how he had been given it by a friend. Tobias Snape had laughed in response, _"You haven't got any friends!"_ He replied, as the young Severus ran back into his room. Another ten-year-old boy might have got a present on his birthday; Severus hid from his parents and reread his mother's old books. On the day he received the letter Severus had ran to find Lily, and she had then gone off to celebrate with his parents. He had gone home and kept quiet, and tried to contain his happiness. And when he finally got to the Hogwarts Train, he was met with a mean boy called James who called him _'Snivellus'_ , and Lily had gotten angry at him and ignored him for the entire journey. And now, here he was, a fifth year who had suffered five years of non-stop bullying from the same boy, watching it happen with his very eyes.

Severus watched as his alternate self scrambled for his wand, when James yelled, _"Expelliarmus!"_

Severus had to clench his fists so that the pain from his nail digging into his skin distracted him from the scene. He had to stop himself from interfering, for his own benefit. If only Hermione could see how pathetic he looked now. She wouldn't like him then. He heard his other self howl in pain, and dug his nails further into his own palms.

But he couldn't take it. It was too painful to watch, too painful to see happening before him. Looking around him desperately, he crept back to the girls lavatory, holding back the tears that were momentarily about to burst from his tear ducts. He let himself cry for his other self, for they were the same person really. The same miserable Severus Snape.


	33. Regrets

**Chapter Thirty-Three: Regrets**

* * *

 _(End of April, 1996)_

Severus Snape regretted a lot of things. He regretted becoming a Death Eater, even after all Hermione had taught him. He regretted telling Voldemort the prophecy he overheard Trelawney tell Dumbledore. He regretted never telling Hermione how much he loved her, although he didn't really ever have the chance. But what he didn't expect to regret, was how he treated Harry Potter. He had never liked the boy- ever since the moment he had first laid eyes on him back when he was a first-year- or, as a sixteen-year-old, rather. He was kind to all his students, Hermione had taught him to be kind, but somehow when it came to Harry Potter, all of Hermione's teachings and wise words went out of the window. He was too much like his father. Even now, when Severus wasn't paying attention or was in a little daze, if he saw Harry it would make his hair stand on end and the sweat break out on him. He would assume it was James Potter and the twenty years between the last time he had been ridiculed dissipated and suddenly he was in the same situation again. It took him a few seconds to recover and realise that it was _1996_ and that James Potter didn't exist. It infuriated Severus that he was still so weak, that even now the no-longer existing James Potter could frighten him to such an extent. But now…now he regretted his actions towards Harry Potter.

When he saw the boy walk around school, like a lifeless corpse, he felt guilt for treating him so unfavourably in the past. Before, he had hated Potter both for being his father's son, but also for the great life he seemed to have. He had friends, a girlfriend, and was known by the whole wizarding world. Something Severus never had. But now, Harry Potter was on the same level as him. They were both suffering, and it pained him. Severus never wished what he was going through on anyone else, and now to see that Potter was indeed going through the very same thing…it was difficult to bear.

The boy no longer attended the Occumeny lessons, although that was hardly to do with the death of Cho Chang. In early April the boy had decided to look into Severus' memories- a crime Severus wasn't going to overlook easily. And his _worst_ memory, too. Perhaps it was a good thing that the Occumency lessons had ended- if Umbridge had ever found out about their little meetings, Severus somehow suspected she wouldn't have been too happy. Even if the boy hadn't intruded into his mind-Severus didn't particularly want to force the boy into coming, nor did he want to delve into his thoughts. And besides, Dumbledore wasn't here anymore. Merlin knows what he was doing.

Severus then took some time to think about his past. He had never really understood why his memory had so many gaps in it- why he couldn't seem to remember anything but particular events. In his memory, he last saw Hermione by the lake when she was telling him about Cho's murder, and how she speculated that Voldemort had something to do with it. He remembered watching her go, and then spinning the time-turner back twenty times. And then…nothing. His next memory was of waking up in his dormitory, without a time-turner, or time-forwarder. His sense of time had been completely turned up-side down, and when he learned that it was early March from Mulciber, he immediately questioned his memories.

 _He was awoken by the sudden creak of an opening door. Severus peered one eye open and saw that it was Mulciber._

" _Why are you sleeping?" Mucliber frowned. "I was here just a minute ago and you were reading that book._

 _Severus' eyes widened as he remembered the conversation. Mulciber had asked him about Veritaserum as he had supposedly been arguing about it with Avery._

" _I suddenly felt really tired." Severus lied, although he was feeling rather tired at that moment. It was as if he had been recently_ Stupefied _, and felt drowsy as a result._

 _Mucliber nodded and muttered something about giving Severus his privacy and then left with a quiet shut of the door._

Severus recalled pondering how on earth it was early March when he had sworn that Hermione was talking about exams. He had written in his little red notebook before he had even managed to get his hands on a time-forwarder that he would time-travel further into the future every time he time-travelled so it would match the progression of time in the past. So if it was early March, he would travel exactly twenty years into the future so it would also be the exact same day in early March. When it became April, he would time travel exactly twenty years into the future where it would also be April. This was to avoid confusion between dates, and Severus had thought it quite a clever idea. But now, he was even more confused. If he had made sure the dates had aligned, then how could it only be early March when Hermione had been going on about exams? And _where_ was his time-forwarder?

Paired with the fact that Severus had absolutely no recollection of actually spinning the time-forwarder to travel into the future apart from the first time he had used it, it left him quite unnerved. He remembered using the time-turner to go back into the past, but for some reason he couldn't remember using the time-forwarder after the first time at all. All he could remember was going to get the time-turner and time-forwarder, telling Mulciber about Veritaserum, using the time-forwarder to go into the future for the first time and then…then it was just going to see Hermione. He didn't remember what happened when he returned to the past. All he remembered was what happened in the future. His last memory of Hermione was by the lake talking about exams and Cho, and then he woke up in his dormitory, in early March. It made absolutely no sense. And he couldn't use his time-turner or time-forwarder as they had disappeared.

Severus suspected he had been Obliviated. It was the only way to explain the gaps in his memory, although he had no idea why. Despite initially wanting to go find Dumbledore and ask him if he could get another time-turner (and time-forwarder, although he wasn't going to ask him for that, of course) he decided to rethink his decision. If he _had_ been Obliviated, then surely something must have happened to make someone want to take away his memory. What if he was in danger? What if Dumbledore was protecting him, from something that he should never have known about? Dumbledore had, after all, always been a loyal and trustworthy wizard. Who was he to question his actions, even if they were to Obliviate him? So he decided to carry on his life as normal. He continued being taunted by Potter and his friends. He grew further apart from Lily- until that fateful day cut their friendship ties once and for all. Severus hated thinking about that day- his worst memory. He had yelled at Lily and called her a Mudblood, despite knowing the implications of it. He had promised himself that day he saw Hermione crying that he would never, ever use that word. But he had been so angry, so embarrassed, that he couldn't help it. When he saw her there, knowing what she secretly thought about him, all he wanted to do was yell at her. Before he met Hermione, he had thought Lily was the world. But in that moment, he saw her as nothing but dust amongst the stars. Dust that would never care about him. And so, hurt that he had lost Hermione and that he was being taunted yet again by Potter, he lashed out on her. The memory would haunt him forever, hence his frustration that Potter had seen it. He had never made that mistake again.

He wasn't angry at the boy now. He couldn't be. Harry Potter, in his current circumstances, needed as much help as he could get. He wouldn't be able to defeat Voldemort with a shattered heart and broken spirit. And Harry defeating Voldemort was, in fact, the only reason Severus Snape still existed.


	34. Guilt

**Chapter Thirty-Four: Guilt**

* * *

 _(Mid-May, 1996)_

The exams hit Hermione like a bullet train. It wasn't that she hadn't realised had difficult they would be, she had been fully prepared for _that,_ but it was her misjudgement of how well she would be able to cope, with Cho's death and everything else. She had thought she'd be fine, and that the exams would fly past like Hedwig when he soared through the sky to bring a letter to Harry. But she had been utterly wrong. Coping with it along with the never-ending exams was nothing short of spirit-crushing and soul-sucking. She could barely wake up without feeling like she was going to vomit from the dread. She hadn't seen Tobias in ten days, since the exams had begun. Although his presence would most likely comfort her, she couldn't find the time between revising, actually doing the exams, and curling up in her bed in despair. She still had four days left of exams, and she wasn't even sure if she would be able to push through. Her parents had always praised her for her intelligence and strong personality, but now she didn't even know if it would be enough.

She wondered how Draco was coping. Presumably, fine. _The bastard,_ Hermione cursed under her breath. She hated him, oh how she hated him! He would finally beat her end of year grades and then he'd walk around, being all smug about it. Whilst poor Harry was suffering dreadfully! Life wasn't fair. Harry hadn't bothered to turn up to _any_ of the exams, and Hermione suspected that although Umbridge was trying to punish him for it, Professor Snape had stepped in and convinced Umbridge that Harry, out of everyone, should be allowed to be excused from his examinations, at least for a month. _What a wonderful man_ , Hermione thought. A warm pang thudded in her stomach at the thought of him, which made Hermione shake her head. _He's not Tobias!_ She had to remind herself again. It was becoming a problem.

Ronald was coping rather well; he had managed to attend half of his exams, and Hermione had fired facts at him before they entered the examination hall. Despite the fact that she wasn't getting on too well with Ron these days, she still hoped he could achieve a high mark. Somewhere inside her, she still cared for him very much. And helping him get a few OWLs might help the small gap she felt in her heart, the one that missed Ron's silly comments and infectious laughter.

Hermione then heard the loud ringing of the bell that signalled it was twelve o'clock. She sighed and grabbed her books that were scattered all over the library table. Her Potion's examination was to start in five minutes, and even though she knew the material, she found it hard to concentrate. Slowly, as if dazed, she made her way down to the Great Hall and lined up in the queue, behind Matthew Gardner, as they had to be in register order. After a few minutes, the large doors to the Great Hall swung open, and all the students made their way to their seats, that was indicated by a small piece of card on each desk that bore their name in large, cursive letters. Hermione went and sat down at the desk with the card which had _'Hermione Granger, Fifth-Year.'_ written on it. She sighed and started fiddling with her thumbs, trying to distract herself.

The examination papers were handed out by Professor Umbridge, who lifted her wand with a smile and made the papers float around the room to each find a desk. She then clicked her fingers and every paper fell onto the desk with a small thud.

"You may begin." She said, with an amused tone.

The sound of paper being turned over filled the room, and Hermione gulped when she saw the first question.

 _ **Question One: Describe the exact preparation of the Calming Draught. Make sure to list all the necessary equipment, and refer to exact measurements. You may include a diagram. (20 marks)**_

She knew the answer. She had written multiple essays on it- she had memorised it for hours. She could answer it with her eyes closed, she could brew it in minutes if you asked her, and she could answer this question in less than five minutes. But…she couldn't. It was as if someone or something was preventing her from writing. She couldn't move her hand- they were frozen still. She could hear the sound of pen nibs scratching parchment around the room, and wondering why she hadn't started yet. She could feel her entire body trembling of its own accord. Her heart was racing madly and she could hear the loud thumping of her own heart beat echoing in her ears. She was going to be sick. She was going to vomit. No…yes…was she? Hermione was sure that she would faint any minute and yet she was still fully conscious. To anyone else in the room it just looked like she was sitting there, perhaps frightened. But inside Hermione's mind, it was like a bomb had just gone off. _What's happening to me?_ She wondered desperately. She knew the answer to the question- so why couldn't she just write it?

 _Hermione…_

Hermione spun her head around. Who had just called her name? She started sweating uncontrollably.

"Hermione Granger! Look forward!" Professor Umbridge shouted, and Hermione managed to turn her head back to the blank parchment that was staring at her face.

 _Hermione, why did you kill me…_

Hermione shrieked loudly. She hadn't killed anybody!

"Hermione Granger! Silence!" Umbridge screeched angrily.

 _You know you're the one who did it…_

 _Not me…_

Hermione couldn't breathe.

 _I never was a traitor…_

 _You're the one he should've killed._

Hermione covered her ears with her hands to stop the menacing words from coming in. It couldn't be Cho that she was hearing. It couldn't be.

 _Now, you've got blood on your hands…_

Hermione pressed her palms into her ears further until she could barely hear people writing. But still, the voice persisted. Was she imagining in? Had she gone mad?

Her saviour was the loud bell that rang, indicating that the exam was over. She had to get out of the exam hall. She could barely make out what Umbridge was saying, and once the students got out of their seats Hermione rushed out of the hall. She ran up to her dormitory, which was thankfully empty, and proceeded to cry. She knew what had happened- the guilt that she felt ever since the day Cho had died was finally coming to haunt her. She blamed herself for the girl's death- why had she ever started DA in the first place? And now Cho was getting her revenge, and making it so that Hermione would fail all her exams.

"I'm sorry!" Hermione choked. "Cho, I'm sorry!"

Her tears flowed freely down her face, and she tortured herself by picturing Cho, lifeless on the floor. It was all her fault. And now she would pay. She continued to cry until Pavarti came in, and even then she hid under her duvet. She didn't bother going to Herbology exam at four o'clock, and instead sobbed at the loss of a friend, which she believed was all her fault.


	35. Disappointed

**Chapter Thirty-Five: Disappointed**

* * *

 _(Mid-May, 1976)_

It was strange, being the only one to not have to do exams. Severus watched behind a pillar whilst a group of fifth-year shrieked about how they were all going to fail. Lily Evans was amongst them. She, unlike the others, seemed perfectly calm.

"Don't worry, guys. We've all revised loads. We'll be fine." She reassured her friends.

"No, _you'll_ be fine. You always get top marks, Lily." Francesca said with a hint of resentment in her tone. Her flashing smile hid her true feelings, however.

Severus watched Lily smile confidently. _Hermione will do better,_ he thought. He had never met anyone who even came close to her level of intellectuality. He could not, however, deny that Lily was quite smart.

"Oi, Evans!" A loud voice yelled.

Severus didn't even need to look to know who it was.

James Potter self-assuredly marched up to Lily, and gave her his best smile. "You wouldn't be able to help me out, would you?"

Lily took a deep breath. "If you're asking me to help you cheat then I-" She started, but was quickly cut off.

"I'll get rid of Snivellus for you." James grinned, hoping she would accept the offer.

Lily frowned for a second. "What do you mean, _'Get rid of'_?" She asked.

"I'll just tell him where he stands, and that he's not good enough to hang out with you. He's stopping us from being together." He smirked at her.

"I think there's a lot more than him that's stopping us from being together." Lily said flatly, but Severus could tell she was secretly enjoying the attention. Severus wasn't surprised if she had begun fancying him, with the way she was acting now.

"Ah, Evans, don't be like that." James said, as he reached to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.

Severus had expected her to hit him or swat his hand away, but instead she blushed. It left him speechless.

"I can tell you some important facts that might help you." She suggested, and Severus didn't miss the satisfied smirk that had appeared on James' face.

"You're a sweetheart." He told her, which earned another blush.

Severus shook his head and quickly returned back into the girl's lavatory. Who was Lily becoming? Obviously his alternate self was not as persistent as he was, and Lily had completely stopped talking to him. If he was still in his proper reality, that never would've happened! He would never have let it happen! It no longer irritated him, as now Severus had Hermione to care about, but the fact that Lily was being so easily led by James, like a fishing net trapping a fish, made him disappointed. And he still missed her company sometimes.

As he entered the bathroom, Severus wondered how Hermione was getting on with her exams. He sincerely hoped she did well although he frequently worried about her. She put too much pressure on herself, and he wondered if it might end badly. She had told him quite matter-of-factly that he couldn't visit her during her exams as she doubted she would have the time. Although he was sad at this, he didn't want to be the reason she didn't do well. He couldn't even imagine how upset she would be if she didn't get the grades she wanted. And, of course, the grades she wanted was _'Exceeds Expectations'_ in every single subject. Although Severus didn't doubt the fact that she was capable of achieving those results, he couldn't help but worry what effect it would have on her mental health. No one could revise as much as Hermione did without giving up after a week, or else they'd go mad.

He admired her determination as it was so much like his own. And now that he didn't have his own exams to worry about, Hermione's exams filled the space. Obviously she wouldn't know about the fact he wasn't actually doing his NEWTs, and she probably never will.

And it was then, as that moment when Severus was deeply thinking in the girls' lavatory when he came to a horrifying conclusion that make every hair on his body stand on end. If he was in his real universe, he'd be doing his OWLs right now. But he wasn't in his real universe. He was in an alternate one, where he wouldn't be able to get any qualification whatsoever. But he must've had got some certificates, as how else would he be working at Hogwarts? Perhaps he'd got other qualifications later on?

Severus bit his lip in thought. It didn't make any sense. How was his future self living…so normally? _'Amused Me'_ must've found a way to escape the alternate universe, but when? In a few days? A few months? Years?

Severus desperately wanted to ask his future self questions about what had happened, but he was afraid that something might happen. Nothing had happened when _'Amused Me'_ had been told by Hermione that his younger self was in the castle somewhere. But what if they saw each other, face-to-face? Would something happen then? If Severus was quite honest, he was rather tired of living in his alternate self's shadow. If it wasn't for Hermione, he wouldn't know what he would be doing. What if his future self had started researching ways to get out? And that was when he finally escaped? Did Severus have to start looking now? He had no idea. He knew that his future self missed Hermione, so he then came to the conclusion that _'Amused Me'_ had found a way to escape and then left Hermione to go back to his real universe.

The idea of leaving Hermione seemed preposterous to Severus. Only a mad person would leave the best thing in their life, that was responsible for all their happiness, for something not as good. What would become of him, even if he managed to escape? Would he become depressed, and forever replaying the memories of Hermione in his mind? Would he continue being tormented by Potter, and mostly ignored by Lily? Before Severus had met Hermione, he had thought his life as normal. It was normal that he was being bullied, that no one liked him and that his parents thought he was a waste of space. He _was_ Severus Snape, after all. The boy with the hooked nose and greasy hair that you tried your best to avoid. But when he had met Hermione, everything had changed. No longer was he an unlovable lowlife, who didn't deserve anyone's attention. He had become someone worthy of love and compassion, and to know that someone like Hermione even existed raised his spirits up to the roof. And the fact that she liked him back caused his spirits to soar though the sky, right up to the moon and back. So if he went back to his old life, would he drown in sorrow at the loss of his lover? He suspected so.

Severus was a midst of turmoil. Should he start searching for ways to return to his proper universe, or should he stay in the wrong one and be able to see Hermione? Did he care more about his own life, his own achievements and grades, or more about Hermione? Severus shook his head. It was a stupid question. She _was_ his life. And he didn't know whether he could give his current Hermione-filled life away for one that would be so, so much worse.


	36. Careers?

**Chapter Thirty-Six: Careers?**

* * *

 _(Late May, 1996)_

Severus knew something was wrong before he even went to hug her. Her lip wobbled and her hair was a mess- although he didn't mind. She looked beautiful regardless.

"Hermione what's wrong?" He asked her compassionately; he hated to see her upset. "Is it the exams?"

She nodded, and looked down at their feet, overwhelmed. Tears started forming in her eyes for the hundredth time.

"How did they go?" He said softly, as he went to cup her face in his hand.

"Badly." Was her reply, and she sniffed sadly.

"I'm sure it can't have been that bad." He replied, but she shook her head firmly.

"I missed some. _Missed_ some, Tobias. I didn't even go to some exams!" Her voice started going higher, and she seemed more angry than upset now.

"How come?" He asked her, with his forehead wrinkled in confusion. If anyone was going to miss an exam, it certainly wasn't going to be Hermione…

"I…I couldn't take it anymore. During my Potion's exam…it was as if all the guilt I had been supressing for two weeks suddenly exploded, and I couldn't even manage to write one word on the parchment."

"Oh, Hermione…" Severus said, whilst he stroked her rampant hair.

"I only missed the last exam of Herbology and Charms. Hopefully if I did well in the other exams…"

And then suddenly, as if the realisation of what she had done had abruptly dawned on her, she let out a howl and started crying.

"What have I done?" She muttered into Severus' neck. "I thought that because Ron and Harry missed some exams, it wouldn't be a big deal if I missed some...most students missed exams this year!" She sobbed.

"Maybe they'll allow re-sits for this year only." Severus told her. "If most people have failed, then I'm sure they'll be able to re-do exams."

To this Hermione didn't say anything, she only hoped that what he was saying might be true.

"It's been hard without you." Hermione said after a while. She pulled herself away from his embrace and went to lock hands with him instead.

"For me, also." He told her honestly. It hadn't been fun being stuck in 1976 for two weeks straight.

"I wonder if…" Hermione started, but decided not to say what had been on her mind.

"Tell me." Severus urged. He hated not knowing what she was thinking.

"Hey, you've got to revise for your NEWTs!" Hermione remembered, glad that she had thought of something.

Severus groaned, she wasn't going to be able to change the subject as easily as that!

"Tell me!" He urged her again, this time more desperately.

"Well, it's related to what I was going to say anyway." She told him, and he sighed in response. "No, honestly. It was." Hermione said. "I was wondering what you wanted to do once you finish school."

Severus wasn't particularly convinced that his career choice was really what she was going to say, but he answered anyway.

"To be honest, I'm not really sure. I thought I might work in the Ministry." He said to her.

She shook her head. "No, I don't think so. It wouldn't suit you."

"Then what would?" He asked her, interested at what she might say.

"Well, I think you should be a teacher." She said, and Severus immediately felt panic erupting inside him. Was this her telling him she knew who he was?

"No!" Severus protested, hoping that it might stop her from linking him and Professor Snape. It was vital that she would never know. Vital.

Hermione giggled, and Severus snaked his arms around her back so that she was close to him, and he looked at her deeply in the eyes. She stopped giggling then, and was distracted by the intensity of the moment.

"What were you really going to say?" He asked her, and this time the thought of dodging the question didn't even cross her mind. It put her in some sort of trance, him holding her like that. It made it hard to concentrate.

"You're leaving at the end of this year." She said simply.

Her words processed in his minds for a second before he realised what she was insinuating.

"I'll still be able to see you." The words came out of his mouth without him even thinking about it.

"Only during holidays." Hermione said, in melancholy. Severus suspected she had been thinking about this for a long time.

"I'll send you letters." Severus said, and he wondered if this was a good thing. Maybe if she thought he was in seventh year, and that he would start working in a few months, she'd forget about him and so when he would finally get back to his real universe, it would be much easier for her to cope. He would have to deal with it, nonetheless.

"Yes but _letters_ can only do so much." Hermione said in exasperation. "I need to _see_ you!"

"What do you suggest?" Severus asked her.

Hermione then gave a cheeky smile and hesitated before speaking.

"Maybe you could…maybe you just haven't revised enough this year and you happen to fail your NEWTs. And then you'll have to re-take the year, and be with me for another year."

Severus was shocked. Was she really asking him to fail? What would her reaction be, if he asked the same thing of her?

It was only when he looked up to her face that he realised she was obviously joking. She was smiling greatly, and trying not to laugh.

"Hermione!" Severus exclaimed.

"You knew I was joking!" She giggled. She then looked at Severus for a moment and sighed. "I wish you could stay here longer though."

Severus hugged her tighter. "I wish that too."


	37. A Kind Headmistress?

**Chapter Thirty-Seven: A Kind Headmistress?**

* * *

 _(Beginning of June, 1996)_

Severus took a deep breath. _It's not James, it's not James._ Hermione had told him that Harry's situation had got progressively worse, and now she was certain he was gravely depressed. She had brought up Severus' offer to talk to Harry, and told him that now it was greatly needed. So now, he was going to attempt to comfort the son of the boy whom he despised. It was quite ironic.

Harry Potter was sat in the library, with a miserable expression on his face. He looked ill and malnourished, and Severus suspected Harry hasn't been looking after himself well. Once Severus got to really look at Harry, his feelings of anxiousness disappeared in seconds. When he looked sad, the boy didn't resemble his father as much. Severus knew James Potter as a smiling, flamboyant sort of character. You'd never see James Potter as unhappy. So when Harry looked down at the wooden library table with his green eyes looking as dull as murky river water, Severus could truly see the difference between Harry and James. Harry Potter was not James Potter. He could see that now.

Severus began to walk up to the library table, and took a seat next to Hermione, which was conveniently opposite Harry. Harry did not look up to look at Severus, he just carried on staring at the oak table.

"Harry." Hermione said, and Severus could tell she was trying her utmost best to be gentle. "This is my…friend Tobias Prince."

Harry did not answer, and Severus wondered as if he'd even heard her. Was the boy so entranced by his thoughts that he wasn't even aware of the real world going on around him? Severus felt a pang of pity for Harry.

"He's in Seventh year." Hermione continued. "And he wants to help you."

And then, Harry looked up. His face bore the most revolted expression Hermione had ever seen, and she felt chills going down her spine.

"Help me?" Harry snarled. "I don't need his fucking help. Tell him to piss off."

Hermione froze. "No Harry, you don't mean that." She said softly.

"I bloody do." Harry spat in anger.

The doors of the library then swung open to reveal a flustered red-head. Ginny. She was running towards the table where Harry sat and threw a sheet of paper on the table. It took Severus a few seconds to realise what it was, and when he did he immediately turned to Harry to see his reaction. He knew it was not going to be a positive one, that much was obvious.

"How dare she?!" Harry shrieked, seizing the poster and ripping it to shreds.

Severus looked back at the torn up poster that bore the words, _'If you need anyone to talk to, see Professor Umbridge. Do not suffer alone. Suicide can be preventable.'_ Underneath the bold words was the moving image of Professor Umbridge herself, giving a sympathetic smile.

"They're all around the school." Ginny revealed. "She's trying to help students who might be suicidal after Cho…"

"She wasn't suicidal!" Harry almost screamed. "It was Voldemort! I _know_ it! How dare she put these posters everywhere, as if that's the reason she died!"

"I know, it's disgusting. Doesn't she have any shame?" Ginny agreed, but this only fuelled Harry's rage.

" _Go away, Ginny!_ " He shouted at her, and she ran away like a scared puppy. Hermione felt sorry for Ginny, but she knew that the girl was being pathetic, really. She was clearly siding with Harry on everything, and didn't realise that it infuriated him more than help him.

And, to make matters worse, Luna Lovegood started speaking from the other table.

"It might be helping students, you know. Even if it has nothing to do with Cho, those posters could be saving someone's life." She said in her poetic voice.

Harry glared at her, but didn't say anything. He couldn't deny that she might be right, although he didn't particularly care about anyone else's situation. His life was bad enough. And what was Professor Umbridge doing anyway, with all those posters? Was she actually trying to be nice for once? No, that would damage her reputation of a horrible, cold-hearted bitch. Harry was convinced that she made the posters to torment him. He didn't expect any less of her.

Severus then decided to speak up. Perhaps it would help if he told Harry some words of comfort, as all that had happened so far was him finding out about the posters, and Severus knew that Umbridge's wide grin on the myriad of posters around the school couldn't do Harry much good.

"I know what it's like to feel like your world is ending, and that nothing matters anymore." He told Harry, but suddenly, as if he had been lighted by a match, Harry's anger resurfaced with ten times the intensity.

"And somedays, you don't want to do anything at al-" Severus continued, but Harry made it so that he would say no more.

" _You_ don't know anything." He told Severus curtly, and then proceeded to storm out of the library. Before he left, however, he looked hard at Hermione. "The next time you force your boyfriend to talk some crap about my feelings, make sure he actually has something helpful to say." He then slammed the doors of the library behind him as he exited.

"I'm sorry." Hermione immediately apologised, but Severus shook his head.

"He needs time." Severus said simply.

Hermione nodded, and fiddled with the ends of her jumper sleeves. It had not gone tremendously well, to say the least. She felt bad for Ron, who was currently in his dormitory. The greeting he would get from Harry was not going to be a pleasant one, that was for sure.

"He's a kind person." Hermione said after a while, and Severus nodded in response. He didn't doubt the fact that Harry could be kind. Depression brought the worse out of everybody.

"He's just crushed. Cho's death…it broke him." Hermione faltered, and her eyes started watering. "My poor Harry…" She whispered.

"Don't worry, Hermione. He'll get better. Time heals everything." He told her.

"After you, he's my best friend. He's in so much pain- I can tell just by looking at him…"

Severus went to hold her hand, but she pulled away.

"What if it's all my fault?" She exclaimed, and brought a hand to her mouth in shock.

"No, Hermione, no. It's not your fault."

Hermione shook her head. "It is, it is, it is!"

Severus then grabbed her by the shoulders and looked at her dead in the eye.

"What good does it do if you blame yourself? How will that help Harry? Harry needs you right now, and you don't have the time to worry about if it's your fault. It doesn't matter. He needs you right now."

Hermione nodded, trying to believe him. It didn't matter if it might have been her fault. Harry's wellbeing was more important than anything.


	38. A Very Moving Letter

**Chapter Thirty-Eight: A Very Moving Letter**

* * *

 _(Middle of the first week of June, 1996)_

Severus knew he had to help Harry Potter. He knew that he had to, in some way, break through the iron-clad walls the boy with the lightning scar had built around himself. Severus hoped that, even though he couldn't get to Harry in person, perhaps he could in writing. It wasn't just for Hermione's conscience that he was doing it, but for the pity Severus himself felt for the boy. He _wanted_ to help him. Merlin knows how much good it would have done him if there had been someone there for him as a child, when he was being yelled at by his father and practically abandoned by his mother. He couldn't let the same feeling of despair develop within Harry, as he knew the damage it could cause. Hence, why he was sitting in the library, on his own as he didn't want Hermione to know, writing a letter that would soon be in Harry Potter's hands. If Hermione was there, he was worried he wouldn't be able to transfer the feelings he wanted to on the parchment. Hermione made him carefree, and forget about his problems. And the whole point of the letter he was writing was _not_ to ignore your problems, and instead address them. He had written many drafts, and felt that they weren't right, and didn't evoke the proper message he was trying to send. He had ripped apart many of them, and he was now onto his thirteenth attempt. Severus stopped writing for a second and read the words that had been hurriedly sprawled across the parchment.

 _Harry Potter,_

 _I know you may discard of this letter without having read it at all, but I hope that you might take the time to read it instead, and that you might actually find solace in these words._

 _Although I have not lost anyone to death, I have lost them to disagreements, which one might consider to be worse. If Cho Chang was still alive today, you know that she would still be yours. Nothing, but death, has separated you. In my case, the person no longer wishes to speak to me. It is their decision, and I wonder if my own death would have affected them at all. I know your pain is much greater than mine, but always remember that Cho is with you._

 _Death is the ugly, deformed creature that steals from us the ones we love most. But you must remember that Cho loved you, and still does. She would want you to continue living, Harry. She would want you to defeat Voldemort, whom I know is back. All of your friends are there for you, Harry, and don't think for a moment that they aren't. This is what Voldemort wants. For you to be secluded and hurt; that is when you are most vulnerable. But you must use Cho's death as a reminder that you are stronger than him. You will beat him. Cho Chang did not die for nothing._

 _I hope time will heal you, as it is most distressing to see you in pain. Although you only see me as Hermione's friend, you must know that I have the utmost respect for you. Keep going, Harry. For Cho. For all of us._

 _Your friend,_

 _Tobias Prince._

Severus thought for a second about Lily. He wondered what she was doing in his real universe, and what her reaction to his disappearance would be. Although he knew he was much less hurt than Harry, he was hurt nonetheless.

He folded the letter in half and slid in into an envelope where he wrote the words, _'For Harry Potter'_ on the back. He then set off out of the library to go find him, hoping that he wasn't in the Gryffindor common room.

And luckily, he wasn't. Severus found him sitting on one of the stone benches on the ground floor of the castle. No one was with him, and in fact the entire ground floor seemed deserted. Albeit, it was late, but back in 1976 everyone hung around the castle until the very last minute before they were ordered to go to bed.

Severus slowly approached Harry, who was staring out the stone floor. He was worried he would frighten him, and so cleared his throat to get Harry's attention.

"Hello." Severus said politely.

"Go away." Harry answered back, with his eyes on the floor.

"I want to give you this." Severus said, and he held the letter out.

Harry raised his head to see what Severus was talking about, and Severus immediately gasped. In the darkness, Harry's eyes shone incredibly. They were a vibrant green, and Severus wondered how he hadn't noticed them in the library. Though of course, Harry hadn't directly looked at Severus once during that encounter. But now, Severus could clearly see his eyes, and he couldn't help but recognise them. Where had he seen them before? Perhaps he didn't look so much like James after all.

"A letter?" Harry asked in a bored tone. "I don't want it."

After a few seconds, Severus recovered from the shock of the boy's eyes. Maybe it was the dim lighting that made them seem so bright.

"I'm not asking you." Severus said. "You can rip it apart, though I hope you won't. I'll just leave it here with you."

Harry remained silent and Severus placed the letter onto the stone bench next to him, before walking away.

* * *

Harry was not going to read that letter. In fact, he wasn't remotely interested in what Hermione's boyfriend had to say. He looked a lot like Professor Snape, Harry remarked smugly. He would have to tell Hermione that, it would put her off him forever. Even if his hair wasn't greasy and long, they had the same black eyes and hooked nose.

Harry glanced at the letter sat next to him. He wasn't going to read it. No. It was probably a senseless poem that was meant to cheer him up. Perhaps Hermione had written it, and sent her stupid boyfriend to give it to him.

Harry sighed as he considered reading the letter. Maybe he could read it, and then rip it up. After all, he could always laugh at how Hermione attempted to make him feel better. He started opening the envelope, and began to read its contents.

 _Harry Potter,_

 _I know you may discard of this letter without having read it at all, but I hope that you might take the time to read it instead, and that you might actually find solace in these words._

Harry snorted, Hermione's boyfriend certainly knew him well. He continued reading. At first, Harry was enraged by Tobias' words. How dare he say that losing someone to a disagreement might be considered worse? Was he insane? However, as Harry continued reading he felt a strange sensation take over his body- a sensation he hadn't felt for weeks. The sensation of relief. Finally, someone knew what he was going through. Harry knew very well that Hermione had been trying to comfort him but somehow, her words didn't seem to help him at all. Tobias hadn't said anything knew, Harry already knew that Voldemort was trying to make him weak, but for some reason having someone else tell him gave the words so much more strength. He truly believed it now.

Harry was so moved by the letter that he started to feel tears dripping down his cheeks. He had been keeping it in for so long. Hiding the pain of Cho's death inside him. But now, he was sat in the darkness crying, and it felt so good to let it out. He cried for Cho, for their moments together, and for the fear he felt to what would happen next. He would have to fight Voldemort, that he knew. As Tobias said, he had to fight for Cho. How ironic it was that the annoying boy who looked so much like Professor Snape was actually nothing like the sarcastic teacher who was nice to everyone but Harry. No, Tobias Prince was actually one of the kindest people Harry knew. He had never received a letter so moving.

Harry wiped his tear-stained cheek with the back of his hand and looked out of the window behind him that revealed a full moon, shining brightly amongst the dark sky. Harry imagined Cho was out there somewhere, amid the stars.

"I'll beat him for you, Cho." Harry whispered, peering up at the sky. And he really meant it.


	39. Murdering Dumbledore!

**Chapter Thirty-Nine: Murdering Dumbledore?!**

* * *

 _(extract of The Prince's Tale used, all credit goes to J K Rowling of course! :))_

Severus had gotten used to the troubles of time-travelling. Waiting for his future self to walk out of his office so that he could escape without being seen no longer annoyed him, in fact he took pleasure in listening to _'Amused Me'_ go about his daily life. Severus could recognise the similarities between himself and the older man, and actually found himself quite amused at his stubbornness. Many times when he was sitting there, beneath the grand desk did he hear snippets of conversation between his older self and Professor McGonagall, and they entertained him to no end. He remembered one particular instance, when Professor McGonagall had pleaded with him to join a special Professor's Only dinner, where all the teachers would assemble to have a chat, usually on Friday evenings. But, as expected, _'Amused Me'_ didn't really want to go.

"Come on, Severus. It'll be fun." Professor McGonagall had told him.

"I have no doubt of that." He had replied. "Only that I'll dampen the mood."

"Nonsense! You are a lovely man, Severus. Everyone knows it. But so secluded, so isolated and taciturn. I often wonder why."

Severus could easily guess why his older self always kept to himself.

"I have always been this way." Severus informed Professor McGonagall. "Surely you have not forgotten the years during which I attended this school as a student?"

Professor McGonagall had sighed.

"No, I have not. You were so detestable back then, which is why I was so pleasantly surprised that you grew up to be such an amiable man. But you remain secretive and shy, and I am sorry that the other professors don't know of your truly lovely character."

"They needn't know. If you know, then that is enough." Came the reply.

"I implore you, Severus. You might even find that you have a good time."

"I apologise Minerva, but I have a rather large sum of essays to mark, and I can assure you that it will not be a short task."

"Very well." Professor McGonagall had sighed, defeated. "I shall see you tomorrow."

Severus felt sorry for his future self. He had thought a lot about whether he should start looking for ways to go back to his real universe, but had eventually decided that he wanted one more month. That was it. One more month with Hermione. And then, he would go back to his dull, boring life which he could see happening with his own eyes.

Severus was currently in the girls' lavatory, inside one of the cubicles. He took out his Time-Forwarder and began twisting the _Year_ button twenty times, however on the last turn his finger slipped and accidentally span the _Month_ button once. Severus barely had any time to register what he had done before he was thrown up into the air.

He landed beneath, as expected, a large desk. But Severus could already tell that this was not his future self's desk, and that he wasn't in his future self's office. Where on Earth was he? He'd only travelled twenty years and one month into the future.

Severus then heard what could only be described as mumbling. He could recognise that it was his future self's voice, but what was he saying? Severus listened closely for the next few minutes and realised that _'Amused Me'_ was chanting incantations. Severus then heard someone gulping something down with great difficulty- a glass of water? He then heard someone wheezing and gasping, as if in pain. The desk then shook slightly as though someone had rested their arm or leg against it.

"Why," Severus heard his future self say, " _why_ did you put on that ring? It carries a curse, surely you realised that. Why even touch it?"

Severus could hear the disbelief in his future self's tone. Who was he speaking to?

"I…was a fool. Sorely tempted…"

Severus almost gasped out loud when he recognised the voice. It was Professor Dumbledore! Now he was even more confused. What had the Headmaster been tempted by?

"Tempted by what?" Professor Snape asked.

It seemed like _'Amused Me'_ didn't know either, Severus remarked.

After a few seconds, Professor Snape spoke again.

"It is a miracle you managed to return here!" His voice was loud and furious. "That ring carried a curse of extraordinary power, to contain it is all we can hope for; I have trapped the curse for the time being-"

"You have done very well, Severus." Dumbledore interrupted. "How long do you think I have?"

Severus noticed a certain relaxed aspect to Dumbledore's tone, and wondered how on Earth that could be. Had he not just asked how long he had yet to live?!

"I cannot tell." Professor Snape replied. "Maybe a year. There is no halting such a spell forever. It will spread, eventually, it is the sort of curse that strengthens over time."

Severus was absolutely gobsmacked. Professor Dumbledore only had one more year to live? It was impossible! He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"I am fortunate, extremely fortunate, that I have you, Severus." Dumbledore told the professor, gratefully.

"If you had only summoned me a little earlier, I might have been able to do more, buy you more time!" Professor Snape said angrily. "Did you think that breaking the ring would break the curse?"

Dumbledore took a while to respond, as his breathing was still ragged.

"Something like that…I was delirious, no doubt…"

Severus could hear Dumbledore straightening himself up on the chair, and placing his hand on the desk to steady himself.

"Well, really, this makes matters much more straightforward." He commented with a calm tone.

Severus was yet again gobsmacked. What was Dumbledore saying?!

"I refer to the plan Lord Voldemort is revolving around me. His plan is to have the poor Malfoy boy murder me." He continued.

Severus thought for a moment. Was he speaking of Lucius Malfoy? But then why was he referring to him as a 'poor boy'? Lucius had to be well into his thirties by now. Perhaps he had a son? And he was going to kill Dumbledore? _What?_

Severus then heard the sound of another chair creaking, presumably his future self had gone and sat down.

"The Dark Lord does not expect Draco to succeed. This is merely punishment for Lucius' recent failures. Slow torture for Draco's parents, while they watch him fail and pay the price." Snape said.

So Lucius did have a son. And he had also failed to impress Voldemort, apparently.

"In short, the boy has had a death sentence pronounced upon him as surely as I have. Now, I should have thought the natural successor to the job, once Draco fails, is yourself?"

To this Severus could not keep quiet. He gasped in astonishment, why was he the next person Voldemort would turn to?

"What was that?" Dumbledore asked, suspiciously.

Severus could feel his heart beating madly in his chest. They couldn't find him now…what would become of him?

Professor Snape didn't seem to bothered by the strange noise. "That, I think, is the Dark Lord's plan." He said, ignoring Dumbledore's question.

"Lord Voldemort foresees a moment in the near future where he will not need a spy at Hogwarts?" Dumbledore asked.

 _I'm a spy?_ Severus wondered. Maybe his future life wasn't so boring after all.

"He believes the school will soon be in his grasp, yes." Snape responded.

Severus eyes almost bulged out of his head. There was no way that was happening!

"And if it does fall into his grasp, I have your word that you will do all in your power to protect the students of Hogwarts?" Dumbledore questioned.

After a few seconds, Dumbledore spoke again.

"Good. Now then."

Severus presumed his future self had nodded and had given Dumbledore his word to protect the school and his students. _'Amused Me' is brave,_ he thought, admiringly.

"Your first priority will be to discover what Draco is up to. A frightened teenage boy is a danger to others as to himself. Offer him help and guidance, he ought to accept, he likes you-" Dumbledore continued, before being interrupted by Snape.

"-much less since his father has lost favour. Draco blames me, he thinks I have usurped Lucius' position."

"All the same, try. I am concerned les for myself than for accidental victims of whatever schemes might occur to the boy. Ultimately, of course, there is only one thing to be done if we are to save him to Lord Voldemort's wrath."

Severus sincerely hoped it was not what he thought.

"Are you intending to let him kill you?" Snape asked him in a sardonic tone.

"Certainly not." Dumbledore replied, and Severus felt a huge wave of relief wash over him. " _You_ must kill me."

And just like that, the wave crashed back into Severus and drowned him in fear and dread. He had to be dreaming. No, this wasn't a dream. It was a nightmare. He couldn't take it anymore. He was going to scream any second. He reached into his shirt to find the time-turner, and with shaking hands twisted the _Year_ button back twenty times, and this time his hand did not slip.


	40. Snape's Worst Memory

**Chapter Forty: Snape's Worst Memory**

* * *

 _Such a cheeky boy!_ Myrtle thought to herself. _So cheeky!_ She wished he would have told her about it, as, after all, they were very good friends. At least she hoped so. Ever since the first day they'd met, they'd become truly close friends and Myrtle hoped she had given him such valuable advice over the years. It was a shame he hadn't properly spoken to her in a few weeks. She saw him in the lavatory from time to time, but he never felt like talking. Anyway, Myrtle didn't hang around there much anymore. She still visited the lavatory every day, but now she took joy in circling the entire castle. She realised that she could go to quite a few places, where she had walked whilst she was still alive. She also liked listening in to the student's conversation that usually consisted of gossip. Sometimes it made her sad, as she had never been part of the gossip when she was alive. She'd always been excluded, and no one bothered to tell her anything.

But right now, she was far from sad. She was gleeful and ecstatic. She had finally found out Severus' secret! She knew he'd been keeping things from her, but it wasn't until now that she had found out exactly what. But, now, oh she knew very well. Her friend, Severus Snape, was a time-traveller.

* * *

When Severus returned back into the past, he realised he was hiding behind a pillar, underneath a bench. That meant he must be in the courtyard. Severus inwardly sighed. Why couldn't his alternate self be in his dormitory? He always seemed to be going on these silly walks! All he wanted to do was run back into the girls' lavatory to think about the conversation he had just overheard. He certainly had a lot to think about!

Severus peered out from beneath the bench and saw a furious Lily Evans, who appeared to be yelling at James Potter.

"Let him down!" She screamed at him, and Severus craned his neck to see his alternate self being hung upside down in the air. His trousers were down to his feet so his grey underwear was on show. The sight made Severus enraged in half a second. How _dare_ he…

"Ah, come on Evans. We were getting on so well the other day. Remember when you helped me on the test?"

"LET HIM DOWN!" Lily repeated, ignoring James.

"Ah, Evans, don't make me hex you." James said, to which Lily angrily told him to "Let him down then!"

James finally released Severus, who was panting heavily.

"There you go," he said, as Snape struggled to his feet again, "you're lucky Evans was here, Snivellus —"

"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!" Alternate Severus yelled in frustration.

"Fine," Lily said coolly. "I won't bother in future. And I'd wash your pants if I were you, Snivellus."

Severus, once again, could hardly believe his ears. He had called Lily a _what?_ What on Earth was wrong with his alternate self? He would never have done that! And she had been so cruel to him too…

James then demanded for Severus to apologise to Lily, but she responded to James saying they were both as bad as each other, and she then proceeded to march away.

Severus was still in shock when he saw James fling his alternate self back into the air.

"Who wants me to take off Snivelly's trousers?"

There were numerous people cheering around him, and Severus used this distraction to run away back into the girl's lavatory to think. Once he got there, he burst out crying. He was so angry, so mad. He hated Potter so much! No, he _despised_ him!

And now, he despised his alternate self too. What right did he have, to insult Lily like that? Although…Severus felt anger towards Lily too. She must've know what would happen as soon as she left! Did she not care? Severus had been kind to her all his life, and now, just one tiny slip-up meant that he was nothing to her? It wasn't fair.

Severus was so frustrated at his life. He had been born into a ridiculously poor family, whilst Lily had the money to buy pretty dresses and as many toys as she pleased. She had a sister to play with, and loving presents. And now, she couldn't handle one insult? That wasn't even meant to be said, and was just shouted as a coping mechanism! Severus could clearly see the embarrassment in his alternate self's eyes. Although Severus himself would _never_ have called Lily that, he could understand why his other self had said it. And now, Lily was oh so offended, that she had decided to not care for him at all? Why was life so unfair! He was too caught up by what he had just witnessed to remember what he had overheard _'Amused Me'_ and Professor Dumbledore talking about. In fact, it was as if the entire conversation had temporarily left his mind.

Severus slumped onto the floor in the girls' lavatory and realised that Myrtle had just floated in.

"Hello, Sevvy!" She giggled at him. "I've got something to tell you."

"What is it?" Severus sighed. He could feel a headache coming on, and rubbed his temples with his fingers.

"Why didn't you tell me you've got a time-turner?" She queried, with a smile on her ghostly face.

Severus didn't even have enough energy to be shocked, or have the feeling of dread overcome him. He didn't feel anything at all. He didn't even care that she knew.

"Well, I should be disappearing then." He sighed, nonchalantly.

Myrtle frowned. "Why?"

"Because," Severus said, "I cannot time-travel when there is a witch or wizard who has knowledge of my time-travelling." The words came out effortlessly as he had revised them for so long.

"Perhaps…perhaps it is because I am a ghost?" Myrtle said. "I'm not _really_ a witch."

"Perhaps." Severus replied, not really caring. He was too tired; and had found out too many things today. He barely had enough energy to tell Myrtle he was going to sleep before he closed his eyes.

His last thought before he felt into a deep sleep was of Harry's eyes. He knew whom they belonged to now. Lily.


	41. Unknown

**Chapter Forty-One: Unknown**

* * *

 ** _Unknown POV_**

 _(Early March, 1976)_

She couldn't believe what he had done. She had been so naïve, or maybe he had been so manipulative. She didn't know which one. And now, she was left to fix the mess he had made. Like always. No wonder everyone hated him.

Getting there had been difficult. She had to break into his office, although she knew that if he ever found her there he wouldn't particularly mind. She shook her head in disgust. It was the only reason he told her anything. And she was going to use it to her advantage.

Now she had to find the boy, and that could be a task in itself. What was his name? Snape? Something Snape…ah yes. Severus Snape. That was it.

She would be able to recognise his face from anywhere. Not many could imitate his dark, opaque eyes. She suspected he was quite a reclusive character. Sociable people didn't have those eyes.

Hogwarts was like a maze. How had she forgotten the layout of the school when she had been there, albeit years and years ago. She wouldn't be able to get inside, but if she waited outside long enough, she was sure she'd find him. They some lessons outside, didn't they? She hoped so.

When she finally saw him walking out of the castle she nearly jumped for joy. Luckily, he was walking by himself with his eyes on the ground. He was even more reclusive than she had once suspected.

When she was sure no one was looking, she grabbed him by his arm.

"Hey!" Severus protested. "Get off me!"

She told him to be quiet, and ignored his complaints that he was going to miss class.

"I'm sure you're aware that time-travelling isn't working out too well for you." She told him.

Severus frowned, although she knew he was pretending to have no idea what she was talking about.

"You can't fool me." She laughed. "And don't worry, that whole _'witch or wizard cannot have any knowledge of time-travelling'_ is all bullshit anyway."

Severus' eyes widened, and she suspected it was because he was shocked. She couldn't help but laugh.

"Look at you. So much trust in that old man."

Severus stared at her.

"Well, we don't have much time. I've gotta bring you back to your proper place. Stupid idiot's gone and messed everything up. People say I'm extreme, but when it comes to him…"

Suddenly a loud, sneering voice shouted, "Snivellus? Where are you?"

To this Severus visibly coiled, and looked back at the witch with avid interest.

"Yes, I'll go." He said.

"I bet you're tired of hiding, aren't you?" She sighed, and she wrapped the time-turner around both their necks.

How she wished she knew then that she'd brought back the wrong boy. She'd brought back the alternate Severus Snape instead.


	42. The Truth

**Chapter Forty-Two: The Truth**

* * *

 _(Late June, 1996 )_

"What's wrong?" Hermione asked, seemingly worried. "You look a little down, Toby."

Severus cringed at the stupid nickname. His name _wasn't_ Tobias, for Merlin's sake. It was becoming increasingly difficult to keep his secrets to himself. Myrtle had found out just a few days ago! Severus craved telling Hermione everything, letting her know who he really was and rant about the terrible situation he was in.

"I'm fine." Severus said instead.

Hermione frowned at him. "No, you're not. I can easily tell when you're lying, you know."

Severus smiled inwardly. She _never_ knew.

They were sitting on the grass bank beside the lake, bathing in the sun's warmth. At least, Hermione was enjoying the weather. Severus was twirling strands of grass between his fingers, in apparent thought. He was thinking about Lily. Of course she had married Potter. How had he not realised the resemblance between her eyes and Harry's sooner? It was obvious! The striking green eyes- who else apart from Lily possessed them? It hurt him to know that his conclusions had, in fact, been true. When he watched her talk to James that day of their exam, he had thought she liked him, but secretly wished that he was wrong. He secretly wished that he was just imagining these things, and that in reality she detested him as much Severus did. When she had yelled at James saying he was as bad Severus, it had given Severus hope that she wouldn't end up with him. Of course, he was hurt by her words, but the fact that she was angry at James too meant that surely she didn't like him that much? But he was wrong, evidently. They had presumably gotten married and had a child named Harry, with all of James' features except his eyes. He had Lily's eyes.

"Fine, then. I'm a little down." Severus admitted.

He wanted to ask her about Harry's parents, and see how Lily and James, mostly Lily, were doing. He wanted to know what their life was like. But he knew that the question would raise suspicions, as Hermione would wonder why on Earth he wanted to know about Harry's parents as he wasn't related to them at all.

Hermione edged closer to Severus, and laid her head against his shoulder.

"Tell me why." She asked him.

Severus sighed. He couldn't. He couldn't tell her about Harry's parents, or complain about all the problems with time-travelling or even ask her what she thought of the conversation between his future self and Professor Dumbledore and the fact that Dumbledore had asked for him to murder him, instead of a boy named Draco, who was apparently Lucius's son. He couldn't tell her _anything._

"A lot of things." Severus said, after a while. "I wish I could tell you, but-"

"Why can't you tell me?" Hermione said, seeming hurt.

"It's…complicated." Severus told her eventually.

Hermione nodded, and then shook her head. She got up from the ground and picked up her bag.

"Fine. If you can't tell you own _girlfriend_ what's making you all sad and grumpy, then, _fine._ I'm struggling too you know, with Harry's situation, failing my exams and everything else but if your situation is _so_ much worse then I guess I'll just g-" She started, but Severus dragged her arm back down so that she was once again seated on the floor.

"I'm sorry." He whispered to her, and he went to cup her face with both his hands.

Hermione blushed at his actions, and could feel her heart beating madly as he gazed at her intently. She stared back at him, and almost felt as if his dark eyes were consuming her whole. She didn't know exactly what happened, but somehow she had edged her face closer to his and now their noses were almost touching.

 _His eyelashes are so long,_ Hermione noted. _Beautiful._

Severus was apparently thinking the same thing.

"You are so beautiful, Hermione." He whispered to her, and it was as if the argument they were having seconds ago had been completely forgotten.

Hermione was having a hard time breathing after what he had just said, and decided to end her agony by reaching forward to kiss him, and she felt her heart leap and a million fireworks explode inside her as their lips met.

For Severus, it was like a rusty old engine had burst into life, like all the cogs and mechanisms in a machine started to work again, like the blood in his veins had never flowed all his life and now suddenly his body was alive, and his heart was thumping with energy. He had never experienced anything like that in his life, and as he kissed her back with all his strength, he worried he wasn't doing a good job.

The pair continued kissing each other and Severus sincerely hoped he was vaguely doing it well. He had no idea what he was doing, after all. Soon, they both ran out of breath and drew back from each other. Severus' hands was still holding Hermione's face and he realised that she had her arms wrapped around his back.

"Did I…did I do that well?" Severus asked self-consciously. He felt his cheeks heat up at the question.

"Yes! Very!" Hermione gasped, smiling at him.

Severus smiled back at her, satisfied. "Good."

"I've never felt anything like that before." Hermione told him, with her eyes wide. He noticed that her cheeks were pink and her eyes were awake and striking.

"Neither have I." Severus agreed. "Have you ever kissed anyone before?" He asked her.

Hermione nodded. "Yes, but it was nothing like that. I didn't even know it _could_ be like that!" She exclaimed, happily.

"I've never kissed anyone before, so I have nothing to compare it to. But I'm glad my first one was that amazing." He smiled at her.

Severus felt incredibly content, as if he was floating in the sky. His heart was still thumping fast from the moments before. He felt utterly elated. However, these feelings soon turned to despair. He couldn't not tell her now. Not after what had just happened. He couldn't believe his future self had been able to leave her, after this! He didn't want to leave her, ever. He decided that he didn't care if she knew. He didn't care that he might disappear into the abyss, once she knew of his time-travelling. He would rather that than live a lonely life without her.

"Hermione, I have to tell you something."

She smiled at him, with a confused expression on her face.

"What is it? That I'm a good kisser? Because I know that very well, Tobias." She teased him.

Severus couldn't help but smile back in return.

"Well you are, but that's not what I wanted to say!" He told her, before reaching to hold her hand. "I'm actually…I'm actually not Tobias Prince. No one is Tobias Prince. He doesn't exist."

Severus felt Hermione drop her hand from his, and the loss of contact made his hand feel cold.

"What do you mean?" Hermione asked him slowly. She looked extremely troubled and worried.

"I…I've been lying to you. For a long time. But you have to understand, I didn't want to!" He protested.

"Just tell me!" She shouted at him, and he could tell that she was about to cry.

"My name is actually…Sev-Severus." Severus managed to spit out. "Severus Snape."

Hermione looked at him incredulously.

" _What?!_ " She cried. "You're telling me you're my Potion's professor?"

She started grabbing her things and walking away, but once again Severus pulled her arm back.

"Yes, I am. But I'm his younger self. I time-travelled here." He told her honestly.

The utterly sincere look on his face made Hermione stop walking away and considered him for a moment.

"You have a time-turner?" She asked him. "I had one in third-year but…wait! You can't go forward in time with one of those!"

"Exactly! I have a time-forwarder and a time-turner." He said, lifting the two devices from around his neck. He showed them to her, and she looked at them suspiciously.

"So…you time-time travelled what, fifteen years into the future?" She asked him.

"Twenty. I didn't mean to meet you and become…friends, I just wanted to see what my life was going to be like."

" _Why?"_ Hermione asked, unable to comprehend.

"Because my life sucked. I was so depressed, for reasons that are too embarrassing to tell you and I just wanted to see if my life actually turned out better." He admitted to her.

"And then you met me." Hermione continued.

"And then I met you." Severus agreed. "And then everything changed. You made my life so much better, and filled it with happiness and excitement. So I started travelling to the future to see you only, I didn't really care about my future self anymore."

"So that's why you lied to me about your robes, and not being in Slytherin!" Hermione said in realisation. "I knew that was too silly to be true! The age thing- that was ridiculous!"

"Yeah, it was." Severus said, embarrassed.

Hermione then looked at him for a few seconds in wonder.

"So you're really Severus Snape."

Severus nodded. "Correct."

"Well, that certainly explains a few things." Hermione sighed.

"Explains what?" Severus asked, rather confused.

"I always felt jumpy around Professor Snape, rather like how I feel around you. And I felt so guilty, I mean, he's a _teacher_ for Merlin's sake! But now I know you're the same person- well, it makes sense now."

"But you didn't realise we were the same person? Not before I just told you?" Severus asked.

"No, I didn't. I mean, I thought you looked a bit similar and some of your mannerisms were the same. But I never suspected that you were the younger version of my Potion's professor who was travelling in time! Of course I didn't realise Tob- Severus!" Hermione laughed, and Severus laughed too, happy she was taking this rather well.

"I'm sorry, I just always worried you would find out." Severus said. "You know, it was quite difficult going to see you in the future."

"How?" Hermione asked. "Is time-travelling with the…time-forwarder difficult? It's strange, I've never heard of a time-forwarder before. But if it's around in your time, surely it must be around now…"

"No, time-travelling wasn't difficult, although I did experience some weird things. What was difficult was keeping up with you. You see, every time I went into the future, I changed things."

Hermione stared at him, puzzled.

"You've always known Professor Snape to be a nice man, right? Apart from Harry, he likes everyone?" Severus asked her.

Hermione nodded. "Yes of course. He gets a bit frustrated at Neville too, but other than that he's lovely. Just like you." She smiled.

"Did you know that the first time I met you, you said, _'Does anyone_ like _Professor Snape?'_ " Severus told her.

Hermione gasped. "I actually remember saying that! But how could I have said that- he's such a lovely man!"

"Your memories of our first meeting haven't changed, but your memories of Professor Snape have. Because of me. Did you know that you once told me who always looked at you strangely? And he was still horrid?"

"Yes, but that doesn't make sense...what?!" Hermione exclaimed, bewildered.

"Because I kept going into the future, your memories of Professor Snape and what he's like changed. The first time I saw you, you said he was horrible. The second time, you said he always looked at you as if he remembered you or something, and that was because I altered my future self's memory into having met you when he was sixteen. The third time you said he looked at you strangely, again, because of me, and then the fourth time you said he was kind to you. My future self's memories changed so that you are more prevalent in his mind."

Hermione took a few moments to understand.

"So…all my strange memories of me saying things about Professor Snape actually happened, but because you kept travelling into the future and changing things, my actually memory of Professor Snape has changed?" She asked, trying to make sense of it all.

"Precisely. I don't know why your memories of our meetings haven't changed, but I'm glad they haven't. Perhaps it's because when I time-travel, it has an impact on my future self's life, but not on our actual conversations. So the next time I come and visit you, you will remember our conversation right now just the same because I do not affect it with all my time-travelling pursuits." Severus reassured her.

"Alright, the conversations stay the same but my other memories don't. That's a bit alarming, but I'm going to try not and think about it. Does that mean, the next time you come to see me, Professor Snape will remember the kiss?" She said, blushing slightly.

"He will. Before, he wouldn't have remembered it as it hadn't happened yet obviously. I hadn't gone into the future and kissed you yet. But now I have."

"Hey, _I_ kissed you first!" Hermione argued. "How will Professor Snape act around me now?" She wondered.

"He will probably be immensely awkward. But you will always remember him acting awkward around you from now on, even since first-year, because your memory will have changed." Severus said truthfully.

"That's so irritating! And confusing...hang on a second, something doesn't make sense. What happens as I get older? We can't…we can't be together, can we? If your future self is teaching here, then we obviously separate…" She whispered to herself.

"Hermione, don't think about that. Let's just enjoy our time, for now. Besides, I have something important to tell you." He pleaded.

"What else? What else can you possibly tell me? I'm ready for anything now." Hermione said hysterically.

"The last time I travelled to the future, I accidentally pressed the _Month_ button as well."

"Ooh! There are different settings? How come my time-turner didn't have that? Do they only come on time-forwarders? That's not fair!" Hermione exclaimed in annoyance.

"Hermione, focus! This is important! When I travelled twenty years and one month into the future, I saw this really strange conversation between my future self and Professor Dumbledore."

"What about?" Hermione asked.

"A curse of some sort…" Severus said before stopping himself from saying anymore. He worried that he shouldn't say anything else. What would she think of him if he told her he was to kill Dumbledore?

"What curse?" Hermione said, thinking.

"I'm not sure. But Dumbledore said I was very important in some plan." Severus said, attempting to be as vague as possible.

"What plan?"

"I don't know. I time-travelled back after a few seconds, when I realised I was one month too much into the future."

"Well, that's strange." Hermione said after a while.

"Yeah, I know. Do you think…do you think me visiting you will have an impact on other things?" He asked her, worried.

"Perhaps…but I don't want you to stop seeing me." She told him honestly. "Not after today."

She went to give him a hug, and Severus couldn't help but agree. He couldn't stop visiting her now.


	43. Death-Eater

**Chapter Forty-Three: Death-Eater**

* * *

 _(First week of July, 1996)_

Hermione watched as the sunlight streamed through the dormitory windows, onto her bare arms. The sun was shining brightly, and so she could easily feel the warmth it was emitting onto her skin. It was very early in the morning, around four-thirty. She had been awoken by the loud snoring of Lavender Brown, who never ceased to irritate Hermione, even when she was asleep. Parvati and Padma didn't seem to mind, however, as they remained fully asleep. Nevertheless, Hermione was glad that she had been awoken as it gave her a chance to think about a few things. Yesterday had been a long day, to say the least.

Tobias was a time-traveller. Or, Severus, rather. She was so used to calling him Tobias or Toby that the name 'Severus' was strange on her lips.

She'd never heard of that name before. _Severus._ Hermione recalled what Tobi- _Severus_ had said the day before. Something about…being a teacher? Hermione frowned. No, that was absurd. There was no teacher name 'Severus Snape' at Hogwarts! What had he been going on about? She tried to remember other bits of the conversation and was frightened to realise that she had asked him sarcastically if he was her Potion's professor! Why on Earth had she asked him that?! Everyone knew that Professor Mottley taught Potions! In fact, he was Hermione's favourite teacher! So what had she been saying?

Hermione also remembered Tobi- _Severus_ telling her that her memories would change but their conversations wouldn't. Did that mean that Severus had once been her teacher? But why wasn't he now? All Hermione remembered was Professor Mottley warmly greeting her on her first day as a first-year, and telling her that he knew she was going to grow up to be a very bright witch indeed. She remembered Professor Mottley gasping when he saw Harry in their first lesson, and him telling Harry that he was honoured to teach him. Everyone knew that Professor Mottley loved Harry, and he often treated him favourably over all the other students. Hermione was sure that no one minded, however, apart from the Slytherins, of course. They _hated_ Professor Mottley, and he hated them in return, as much as he tried to hide it. Hermione smiled as she recalled fifty points being taken from Slytherin when Malfoy had called her a Mudblood, and Professor Mottley had gotten so angry she almost feared he was going to hex Malfoy.

 _"_ _DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT DISGUSTING, VILE WORD!"_ He had screamed at Draco.

Hermione could already sense something was wrong. Her conversation with Tob- _Severus_ had shown that she was meant to have Severus Snape teach her Potions, however her own memories proved to be very different. What had happened for this to be the case? Hermione decided to go and ask Dumbledore. Perhaps he would know. She decided to think about the _kiss_ later.

* * *

When Hermione went to knock on the Headmaster's door, she was shocked to see Professor Mottley answer the door. His usually perfectly kept curly golden hair was messy and wild, and his robes were all ruffled. He was panting heavily, and appeared to be distressed.

"What is it, Hermione?" He asked her with obvious hurry, and Hermione didn't know what to respond.

"I…I…isn't this Professor Dumbledore's office?" She questioned him in wonder. What was he doing there?

"Yes, yes, you are correct. What do you need, Hermione?" He snapped at her, but immediately backtracked once he saw the look of hurt that was evident on her face. "I apologise, Hermione, but I'm in a rather tricky situation right now."

"Maurice!" A voice croaked from inside the office, and Hermione knew it to be the voice of Professor Dumbledore. He sounded to be in pain, and Hermione rushed into the office, ignoring Professor Mottley's protestations.

Once Hermione entered the office, she was taken aback by the sight of Albus Dumbledore, heaving with obvious difficulty as he sat on a chair. Hermione noticed that his hand was badly burned, and that the skin was charred and black. Professor Mottley rushed in behind her and closed the door.

"Maurice…what…on Earth…is she…doing…here?" Dumbledore managed to get out.

"She rushed in here, Albus." Professor Mottley said, as he walked up to Professor Dumbledore. "Are you feeling better now? Have you drank it all?"

Dumbledore nodded, and indicated to the empty goblet in his other hand.

"What's going on?" Hermione asked in confusion.

"You should…really…get her…out…of here…Maurice." Professor Dumbledore said in between gasps of air.

"I will Obliviate her, no need to worry." Professor Mottley said nonchalantly as he pressed his palm to Professor Dumbledore's head to see if the fever had gone.

"Hey, no you won't!" Hermione protested, and only then did she notice the strange ring sitting on the desk besides Dumbledore.

She recognised it to be Marvolo Gaunt's ring, as she had read a lot about it in her third-year for a bit of light reading. She knew it contained a curse, and she then gasped in realisation of what had happened.

"Professor Dumbledore! Why did you touch it?!" She exclaimed.

"I, too, await the answer, Albus." Professor Mottley said, peering down on him.

Whilst they waited for Professor Dumbledore to recover and for his breathing to become more even, Hermione realised that Tobia- _Severus_ had been talking about a curse. Was this what he was referring to? If he was supposed to be in Professor Mottley's place, then the event made sense. Hermione then realised that Tobi- _Severus_ had travelled one month too far into the future exactly a month ago, and so the timings made sense.

"I…was a fool." Professor Dumbledore started. "Sorely tempted…"

"Tempted by what?" Professor Motley asked, but Hermione's mind was elsewhere.

She had come to Dumbledore's office to ask him about Severus Snape, and that was what she had to do.

"Professor Dumbledore, please listen to me. I want to ask you about Severus Snape-" Hermione commenced, but abruptly stopped when she saw the look of utter horror on both the men's' faces, whilst they gasped in shock.

Professor Dumbledore then began to cough uncontrollably, and Professor Mottley had to pat his back rather firmly to allow Professor Dumbledore to breath properly again.

"You…shall not…speak that man's…name…ever." Dumbledore scolded Hermione, although the effect was rather lost in his slow pace of speech.

"Why? What has he done?" Hermione questioned, feeling a knot in her stomach. She had a feeling she was going to find out something very bad. Something very bad indeed.

"Perhaps you should leave, Hermione." Professor Mottley said, drawing out his wand to Obliviate her.

"No!" Dumbledore gasped. "She…has asked…and so I…will tell her. She is…friends with…Harry, after…all."

Professor Mottley didn't appear to be too pleased at this.

"Albus, please. It is not right for her to know. It shall only scare her." Mottley tried to persuade Dumbledore. But all in vain; Dumbledore had made up his mind.

Meanwhile, Hermione was infuriated. Why couldn't they just tell her?

"Tell me!" She exclaimed. "What has he done?!"

"Merlin, _what_ _has he done!_ " Mottley shouted, with an ironic tone.

"He is…a Death-Eater, Hermione." Dumbledore said gravely.


	44. Careless

**Chapter Forty-Four: Careless**

* * *

"He is…a Death-Eater, Hermione." Dumbledore said gravely. "Surely now…you know what he has…done." He breathed more deeply and seemed to almost have fully caught his breath.

Hermione gasped in disbelief.

" _No…_ " She whispered, and Professor Mottley only guffawed in response.

"He's Voldemort's most loyal follower!" Mottley exclaimed, and Dumbledore then reprimanded him for speaking the evil wizard's name in front of a student.

"I apologise, Albus. But I will Obliviate her anyway, so it matters not." He replied.

"I am afraid we cannot Obliviate her now." Dumbledore said, with his speech finally back to normal again. "I believe there was a specific reason for her asking me such a question, I can tell by her expression. What do you wish to tell me, Miss Granger?"

Hermione was still in shock.

"I…I-I thought…how is he a D-Death-Eater?" She stammered.

"How do you know of him, Hermione?" Professor Mottley asked kindly although the tone of suspicion could not be missed in his voice.

"Well…this is going to sound absolutely _crazy_ but…well, I met him." She admitted, and she could tell by her Potion's professor's face that he thought she was joking.

"Albus!" Mottley exclaimed. "The girl has gone mad! I am very fond of dear Hermione, but I am sorry to say that I don't know what is going on with her…" His voice trailed off when he saw Dumbledore's hand waving and dismissing him.

"Let her speak, Maurice," Dumbledore said. "Now, Miss Granger. What do you mean, you 'met him'?"

"I did. Several times. His younger self, obviously…" She looked up to see their blank faces. "He time-travelled. As a teenager."

"Hermione, you're telling us that a sixteen or seventeen or whatever year-old Severus Snape travelled to the future and met you?" He asked her incredulously.

"Yes, he did! And he told me that it would change things, so I think before he messed everything up, Severus Snape taught Potions here…" Hermione said in an uncertain tone.

"Let me guess, he changed the future so that now I teach here instead of him?" Professor Mottley sneered. "I've _always_ taught here, and he's _always_ been Voldemort's little puppy!"

"Now, now, Maurice. Let her finish." Dumbledore told him. "You're saying that the young version of Severus Snape changed the future so that he no longer, or never, rather, teaches here?"

"Yes, exactly. I'm not too sure how it works, in fact I don't even understand how I remember certain things and other things I don't, but…I specifically don't understand how he's become a Death-Eater. How does that make sense? All the other changes made him a nicer person!"

"How many times has Severus visited you, Miss Granger? And could you please explain yourself more?" Dumbledore asked her, and Hermione noticed that he seemed perfectly calm.

"He's visited me…a fair few times. Basically, I remember the encounters we have perfectly, and my memories of those never change. But my memory of actual events does. Tob- _Severus_ reminded me about our first conversation, and I actually recall complaining about a 'Professor Snape'. But obviously, I don't actually remember being taught by him, because-" Hermione started.

"Because it never happened!" Mottley shrieked, interrupting her. " _I_ have always taught you Potions. Not him!"

"Be quiet, Maurice." Dumbledore said. "This is very interesting, Miss Granger. I wonder if you and the teenage Severus developed some sort of relationship…?" Dumbledore suggested, and Hermione blushed crimson in response.

"Oh, that is disgusting!" Professor Mottley yelped. "Hermione, what is wrong with you?! He's a Death-Eater, for Merlin's sake! You are vile, and-"

"He's not a Death-Eater! I don't know what his time-travelling has done, but it's changed everything for the worse!" Hermione protested, feeling utterly embarrassed.

"'Changed everything for the worse!'" Professor Mottley sneered. "He always been an evil man, and only now do you realise it!"

"HE'S NOT EVIL!" Hermione screamed at him, and she couldn't believe she was arguing with her favourite teacher. But it was about Tobias, or Severus,rather. And she had to defend him.

"What you are saying is impossible anyway!" Mottley exclaimed with his arms thrown up in the air. "Time-turners cannot travel into the future, and certainly not into future decades!"

"He has a different device! Why would I be lying?!" Hermione yelled.

"I don't know, to get my attention? Merlin knows what goes through a sixteen-year-old girl's mind!" Mottley yelled back.

Hermione was clearly enraged.

"How _dare_ you?!" She screeched. How dare he believe she had a crush on him and was trying to get his attention!

"Maurice, if you are not silent now I will have to force you to leave." Dumbledore informed him coldly.

The Potion's professor unhappily sat down on an empty chair and remained silent.

"I think it's become more than just a problem for Severus, professor." Hermione said to Dumbledore after she calmed down from the argument.

He looked at her in curiosity.

"What do you mean?"

"The last time I saw him, he said he had travelled one month too far into the future by accident. He said he heard you talking about a curse of some sort…and that you said he was involved in some plan." Hermione explained. "The timing is right, and if he's meant to be in Professor Mottley's place, then it makes sense too. The curse he was talking about was in the ring of Marvolo Gaunt. And you've touched it."

Dumbledore frowned.

"How do you know about the ring?" He asked her.

"I read, Professor." She answered simply, to which Dumbledore nodded and ran a hand down his long beard.

"What plan could Severus Snape possibly have been in, which I was aware of…" Dumbledore wondered, and then he suddenly fell off his chair as it crashed into the hard, stone floor.

"Albus!" Professor Mottley exclaimed, and he went to pick Dumbledore up and return him to the now upright chair.

"It all makes sense!" Dumbledore gasped once seated again. "Oh my…what has he done? WHAT HAS HE DONE?!" Dumbledore yelled furiously.

Hermione couldn't believe it. She had never see Dumbledore like this, so uncalm. He was known for his laid-back nature. It was one of his most well-known characteristics. Something extremely important must have happened for him to react like this.

"Professor, what's wron-"

"GET THE BOY! I KNEW THERE WAS A WAY OUT, DAMN HIM! BRING HIM TO ME!" Dumbledore roared.

"Albus, what's going on?" Professor Mottley asked him worriedly.

"The Draco boy- what I was telling you as I came in before!" Dumbledore exclaimed. "Snape's supposed to be part of it!"

"What about Draco?" Hermione exclaimed, but was ignored by both of them.

"He is!" Mottley argued. "He's a Death-Eater, of course he knows about Draco and his plan!"

"Yes but, that night, oh that night!" Dumbledore chanted in frustration.

Even Professor Mottley had stopped following now. Dumbledore suddenly turned to Hermione and grabbed her.

"The last time you saw him- what happened?" He asked with no patience.

"I..uh… well he told me who he was and we…we kissed." Hermione admitted, embarrassed.

"Merlin's beard!" Professor Mottley yelled in disgust.

However Dumbledore pushed Hermione away in realisation and started shaking his head.

"This is what has changed everything! He loves you more than her now! So that night- where he heard the prophecy- he never switched sides!" Dumbledore shouted.

"Professor!" Hermione pleaded. "What do you mean?!"

Dumbledore staggered towards her and looked her dead in the eye.

"You know that Harry's parents were murdered by Voldemort. The prophecy that revealed Harry was told to Voldemort by Severus himself. He came to me afterwards and told me that he was worried Voldemort was going to kill Lily too, and that he had begged Voldemort not to kill her. I asked him what he would do if Lily was killed, and whether he would change sides. You have to understand it was rather an intense situation, as he was a Death-Eater, after all. He looked at me directly and said that even though he did love Lily once, she did not mean much to him now." Dumbledore revealed.

"Then why did he ask for her not to be killed?" She asked, ignoring the dagger lodging itself in her heart. She was shocked to discover her boyfriend had once loved Harry's _mother_ but she knew there were more important things to discuss.

"Because he did love Lily. A part of him will always love her. But don't you see Hermione? Now, you have gone and stolen the rest of his heart. Now, you mean more to him then Lily does. Now, when Lily Potter will be murdered by Voldemort, he still does not switch sides as _you_ exist and were part of his life!" Dumbledore told her.

"So, when he hadn't kissed me yet, when he wasn't completely attached to me, he must have switched sides that night as Lily meant so much to him." Hermione said in realisation. _Wait_! _Switch sides?_ She repeated in her head. _He became a Death-Eater anyway? It's impossible, he was so kind..._

Hermione was astonished. Everytime Tob- _Severus_ changed the future, it was for the better. He became a nicer, gentler person. But in reality, he still became a Death-Eater during his late teen years each time, only this time, he remained one. She felt light-headed at her inference of what had happened.

"Exactly." Dumbledore agreed. "Severus had switched sides, and he must have been loyal to me. The plan of which he spoke, must have been _my_ plan. I must have had a plan to defeat Voldemort, but now I can no longer carry it out, nor do I even know what it is, because that night on the hilltop Severus Snape decided he cared more for you than for Lily."

"So it's my fault?" Hermione choked. "We won't be able to defeat Voldemort because of me?"

"It is not your fault. It is Severus', as he is the one who travelled into the future in the first place. But he grew attached to you in the process. In fact, I am surprised that the future didn't change into one where he became a Death-Eater sooner." Dumbledore remarked.

 _Ouch,_ Hermione thought. Tob- _Severus_ must have not liked her that much, if he still regarded this 'Lily' so highly so late into their relationship. But now it meant that the entire Wizarding Word was at risk.

"What should we do?" Hermione asked desperately.

She turned to look at Professor Mottley who had remained rather quiet. But he had nothing to say, and instead looked to the floor.

"It is simple. Severus has to travel back to when he first got whatever device permitted him to go forward decades in time, and not use it so that none of this ever happened." Dumbledore said.

"So…I'll never see him again?" Hermione said in a small voice.

"You will never see him again. But it is for the greater good, Miss Granger."

Hermione could feel tears welling up in her eyes.

"Now all you need to do is bring him to me the next time he comes and sees you, Miss Granger." Dumbledore told her, but once he realised she was crying he beaconed her towards him.

She ran into his arms and cried against the old wizard's shoulder, and all Dumbledore could do was comfort her.

"Poor child." He said sadly. "The boy was careless. He didn't think about the consequences to his actions. Severus Snape has no idea what he has done."


	45. Riddle's House

**Chapter Forty-Five: Riddle's House**

* * *

 _(First week of July, 1976)_

Everything was different. Severus felt like he was living a completely different life. Ever since his kiss with Hermione, he felt so euphoric, so _happy._ He saw himself in a changed light, and even his perspective on life had somewhat changed. He had to tell her. Tell her what she meant to him and that he loved her. He had realised something after he had returned back to the year 1976 after the kiss. He had realised something about Lily.

He had never loved her. No. He had been _infatuated_ by her. Infatuated by her looks, her reputation and intelligence. Loving someone wasn't when you put them on a pedestal and basically worshipped them. It wasn't when you thought they were so superior to you, and that you were even lucky enough for them to acknowledge your presence. Love was when you truly cared for someone, when they were the single most important in your life and you would do _anything_ for them and to make them happy. And that was what Severus felt for Hermione. He just wanted her to be content and satisfied, and she wasn't just an idol to be worshipped for her beauty, _(although Severus couldn't deny that he found her incredibly beautiful and entrancing)_ but someone to be appreciated and looked after. Severus decided that he had to tell her.

When he travelled forward twenty-years with his time-forwarder, however, he didn't find himself under an old wooden desk, as he expected.

* * *

Instead, he found himself under a large rectangular dining room table, that Severus presumed was at least four to five metres long. He looked around to see many pairs of feet, some wearing shoes of high quality that cost no doubt hundreds of Galleons, and others were wearing much cheaper, simpler shoes that recognised his father wearing, as they did not have much money. He was horrified to see one pair of feet, at the end of the long table, that was clad with no shoes. The feet were pale and marked with ice-blue veins and the toe-nails were long, dirty and crooked.

 _Where am I?_ Severus wondered with dread. Why was _'Amused Me'_ sitting at a table with someone who clearly hadn't heard of a nail-clipper? Or heard of shoes, either.

"Do you have your full trust in Draco completing the task that has been set for him in a year's time, Lucius?" Severus heard a voice say. The voice was almost like a whisper, but more assertive and sounded threatening whilst at the same time appearing gentle. The voice frightened Severus.

"Y-yes, of course, my lord. He will complete the task." Another voice said, and in contrast this voice expressed barely-hidden nervousness and worry.

Severus could obviously guess the voice belonged to Lucius Malfoy, but was shocked to see how anxious the man had become. Severus could hardly blame him, however, as the voice of the other man was enough to make any man shudder. Severus then realised that Lucius was sitting right there above where he was crouched as he was the only one with their feet tapping against the floor in agitation. Severus also noted that those were the most expensive shoes, too. _Definitely Lucius,_ Severus confirmed in his head.

"I hope so." The other man sneered. "For your sake as well as mine."

Severus could hear Lucius gulp.

"But, my lord!" A woman's voice cried out. "What if he should fail?"

"Bellatrix, as much as I would love to give you the honour of killing Dumbledore if Draco fails, you know it is impossible. We cannot enter Hogwarts." The raspy-voiced man said.

"But-" She protested, only to be stopped by the voice of a man that caused the blood in Severus' veins to freeze.

"The Dark Lord has already told you, Bella. Dare you go against his word?" _'Amused Me' s_ aid, although Severus could hardly call him by that nickname anymore.

And then, all of a sudden, every puzzle piece fell into its place. They were talking about the plan that Dumbledore and his future self had been discussing, although now he was at one of the meetings. He was just acting as a spy, that was all. His nickname could be re-given after all.

"It is a shame, Severus, that you do not teach at Hogwarts. You could have been a valuable spy for me. And Draco would have had some support, if he should have needed it." The man that Severus now knew to be Voldemort said.

Just like that, panic resurfaced through Severus. So he wasn't a spy? What was going on? Why had Bellatrix asked to kill Dumbledore if Draco failed, and why was Voldemort telling him it was a shame he didn't teach at Hogwarts? What had happened?

"It would not have been possible, my lord. Dumbledore knows of my loyalty to you." The older Severus said.

Voldemort laughed in a mocking tone.

"That is where you're wrong! You should have tricked him into thinking you were on his side, and then this plan would have been much easier! I do not have my complete faith in Draco, and this task _needs_ to be completed! Dumbledore _must_ be killed!" Voldemort exclaimed.

"When would I have convinced him?" The older Severus asked, and Severus felt fear for his older self. Was Voldemort threatening him?

"The night I murdered the boy's parents!" Voldemort shouted.

 _What boy?_ Severus wondered.

"My lord-" The older Severus began, but he was quickly interrupted.

"Crucio!" Voldemort yelled, and soon the screams of his older self filled Severus' ears.

The sound was almost deafening, and Severus could see a pair of feet shaking and jerking uncontrollably to the left of him. This carried on for a few seconds until the older Severus fell off his chair and slumped onto the floor, gasping.

"Ah, well." Voldemort sighed. "It matters not. At least if Draco fails, there will be someone I can punish as responsible. Aside from you and your son, of course."

Severus could guess that Voldemort was referring to Lucius. He crouched down further until he was lying with his stomach on the floor, and stared at his older self who was currently sprawled there, with sweat running down his face. Severus felt tears running down his face as he saw the broken face that would be his future.

 _Why do you stay a Death-Eater?!_ He wanted to scream at him. _Why do you not leave?_ But deep down inside, Severus knew the answer. He couldn't leave.

After a few seconds, the older Severus' face twitched and his eyes opened in a flash. Before Severus could move, his future self had already seen him. Severus gasped as they stared at each other, and he wondered how this was possible. And then, Severus realised his future self was trying to tell him something. The old man's eyes were wide and pleading, and then indicated to the time-turners hanging on Severus' neck.

 _Get out,_ his future self mouthed.

But Severus didn't want to. He had to see Hermione. Now. He knew that he could time-travel a few hours into the future, but who knew what his future self was doing then? Getting tortured by Voldemort? It might even be more unsafe to time-travel then. And he didn't want to time-travel weeks into the future where Hermione would not see him for so long. No, he was going to see her now. He started crawling towards the door that thankfully was wide open at the end of the room.

"Tired, Severus? If you don't get up now I'll assume you're dead." Severus could hear Voldemort say.

Severus tried to ignore his older self's groans as he tried to get up and fail, and then tightened his fists when he heard Voldemort once again cast the Cruciatus Cruse causing his future self to scream, and wither in pain. He couldn't bear it, and crawled as fast as he could until he ran out from beneath the table through the door.

"WHO WAS THAT?!" Voldemort bellowed. "GET HIM!"

 _What do I do, what do I do, what do I do?_ Severus panicked as he ran down the nearest flight of stairs. The house was a bloody mansion.

 _I could always Apparate…_ Severus thought, but he knew very well the dangers of under-age Apparating. He might lose a leg in the process, or an arm, or both. When he Apparated to the Ministry with Dumbledore, it hadn't been the first time he'd done it. As the legal age for an Apparating license was seventeen years old, all fifth-years took the Apparating exam and so Severus had practised, a lot. But still, Apparating with Dumbledore proved that he was not yet used to the strange sensation, and it could end very badly.

 _What was I thinking?!_ Severus screamed in his head. _How did I think I'd escape?!_

"FIND HIM!" Severus heard Voldemort roar again. "SEVERUS, GET UP!"

As Severus ran down the second flight of stairs, he sincerely hoped his future self was not going to be tortured again. He had never been subject to the curse, but he could only imagine how painful it could be.

"SEVERUS, YOU USELESS…AVADA KEDAVRA!" Voldemort cried, and Severus felt his heart stop in his chest.

 _No…_

 _He couldn't be…_

 _He wasn't…_

Dead.

Severus couldn't run any longer. It was as if his body had stopped functioning. He crashed to the floor in slow-motion, and could barely hear the voice of Bellatrix.

"I've found him!" She yelled. "Avada-"

With all the strength Severus had managed to build in the last few seconds, he spun around and disappeared, leaving Bellatrix's curse to turn to nothing in the air.


	46. Parting

_**(As this story is already confusing enough, I've decided to not include Harry and the others going to the Ministry, and the whole ordeal with Umbridge. So basically after Dumbledore returns after touching the ring, he convinces Cornelius Fudge into making him once again Hogwart's Headmaster, unknown to Umbridge, of course.)**_

* * *

 **Chapter Forty-Six: Parting**

* * *

Freezing. The first thing Severus realised that it was freezing. The second thing he realised was that he couldn't breathe. He was under water.

Severus started to kick his legs and thrash his arms about madly- he had never been a keen swimmer. He'd only been to the first three years of Muggle school, so he'd never learnt to swim. It wasn't as if the subject was taught at Hogwarts.

He continued pushing himself upwards when he found that his leg was trapped in some sort of plant that clung onto his legs as if its life depended on it. What kind of plant just floated in the middle of the ocean?! Severus wondered angrily. He was losing oxygen-fast. Severus began kicking more rapidly and he began to wonder if this was going to be his end.

 _I'm going to die…_

At least it wouldn't be like the death he was destined to have, at the hands of an angry Lord Voldemort. Severus wanted anything but that life. He knew he was clever and aspiring, so how come he had lowered his standards to become nothing but a Death-Eater? He was talented, for Merlin's sake! He himself knew that he was capable of things others his age were not, he knew more spells that some of his professors, and he knew he could execute them perfectly. So why had he become...wait. _He knew more spells than some of his professors._ So why wasn't he doing anything to save himself now?!

Severus wanted to punch himself in the face once he drew out his wand and pointed his wand upwards facing the sky.

"Ascendio!" He cried as he was propelled upwards into the air, crashing out of the sea and landing most ungracefully onto the muddy bank.

Severus panted heavily as he lay in the gravelly mud, thankful that he had not Apparated into the middle of the sea. Although he was lucky he had managed to successfully Apparate. Swimming with a missing leg would have been significantly more difficult. He wondered why he had not appeared in Hogwarts, as he was meant to. It would have been a lot easier for him.

The answer hit him suddenly. No one could Apparate or Dissapparate to Hogwarts. Dumbledore had created a jinx. So naturally, he had landed to the closest place he could Apparate to. Which meant he had a great deal of walking to do until he reached the gates of Hogwarts that he'd have to somehow get past.

 _Guess I should start walking,_ he sighed as he started trudging along the path.

* * *

"How did you get out, dear?" Umbridge asked.

Severus could tell she was trying to act friendly. He knew that she secretly wanted to tear his head off and rip it into shreds. As soon as he had arrived at the gates that Argus Filch happened to be supervising, he had immediately run off to go and get the Headmistress.

"I don't remember, Professor Umbridge." Severus told her, as innocently as he could.

He made sure not to accidentally lean against the iron gate that Umbridge would not let him pass, as he was sure it was jinxed with some sort of anti-intruder spell.

"Well, what is your name?" Umbridge asked, drawing out a large parchment scroll.

 _Shit._ He couldn't say he was Severus Snape, or Tobias Prince. What was he supposed to do?

"I..uh…" He began.

"Yes?" Umbridge smiled a crooked smile.

And then, Severus saw a figure approaching from the distance behind the gates, accompanied by another, taller figure.

"What are you staring at?" Umbridge spat.

She span around and gasped when she saw Professor Dumbledore and Professor Mottley making their way to the gates.

"Now, Dolores." Dumbledore started. "I'm sure we can let Tobias Prince come back in? He's not a big threat to our school, don't you agree?"

"You…" Umbridge gasped. "How are you here? You disappeared months ago and nobody knew where you were! Maurice, did you know where he was all this time?"

"I did not. I only found out this morning." Mottley said.

"Why did you not come to me sooner?" Umbridge shouted. " _I_ am the Headmistress of this school, and I deserve to know about everyone who enters it!"

"I have now returned." Dumbledore stated simply. "That reminds me- you are no longer Headmistress at this school. If you wish to protest, you might want to go and speak to Cornelius Fudge. Now then Tobias, come along."

Severus could see a flash of something he couldn't determine in Dumbledore's eyes, and he then gulped. Umbridge was furious but couldn't say anything, and so she quickly Apparated to the Ministry once Dumbledore had temporarily removed the jinx.

 _I wish the jinx would have been removed when I Apparated here,_ he thought in annoyance.

Severus then followed Dumbledore and the strange teacher who was eyeing him angrily. Once they arrived at Dumbledore's office, Severus got to see Hermione.

"Hermione!" He exclaimed happily as he ran up to her to give her a hug.

"Tobias! What happened? You're so dirty and muddy and wet!" She said, looking at him.

Severus dismissed the fact she called him Tobias and instead focused on the fact that he must look like absolute filth right now. Severus then heard Dumbledore shut the door behind him and then all of a sudden, without warning, Dumbledore grabbed Severus by the collar.

"You stupid boy!" He yelled, clearly enraged. "Do you know what you've done?"

Severus was shell-shocked. Dumbledore had been acting so calm before. Why was he so angry? Severus didn't' even bother to worry about the fact a teacher was seeing him, as he had a feeling the whole 'knowledge of time-travel' thing had been false.

"I'm going to tell you exactly what you have to do, and you must obey all my instructions!" Dumbledore shouted at him.

"Wait!" Hermione protested. "Give us a moment professor, _please!_ " She begged.

"Wait, what's going on?" Severus asked, totally confused.

No one answered him, however, and instead Hermione grabbed his arm and walked them both out of the office.

"I give you fifteen minutes!" Dumbledore yelled from inside.

Hermione kept walking rather quickly and ignored Severus' many questions about what was going on. When they finally reached the lake, Hermione let go of his arm and turned her back to him, staring at the lake.

"Hermione, please tell me what's happening." Severus pleaded. "Please."

After a few seconds Hermione turned to face him, and he could see that tears were forming in her eyes.

 _Oh no,_ he thought worriedly. This couldn't be good.

"You said that when you time-travel you appear where your future self is." Hermione said, with her voice breaking emotionally.

"Yes, that's right…what's wrong, Hermione?"

Severus felt _extremely_ anxious now.

"Would you like to tell me where you ended up this time?" She asked him as the tears broke loose and freely ran down her face.

 _How does she know about the Death-Eater thing?_ Severus wondered, until the answer hit him straight in the face. He didn't teach at Hogwarts anymore.

"Tell me!" Hermione shouted when he didn't reply.

"A house!" Severus stuttered. "Some random house…"

"And what was going on in that house?" Hermione yelled at him questioningly.

"A meeting!" He cried. "A Death-Eater meeting with Voldemort."

"Don't say his name!" Hermione barked angrily. "How could you become a Death-Eater after everything-"

"Hermione, please!" Severus protested. "Please don't hate me for the person I become. I'm not that person yet!"

And if she hated his future self that much, perhaps she would be glad to discover he was now dead, at the hands of Voldemort. Severus had successfully managed to push his older self's cries as he was murdered out of his mind, but they had now resurfaced. That was his _future._

"Yet!" Hermione almost screamed. "But it shows what kind of person you'll be!"

"How can I help that?!" Severus yelled. "I don't even know-"

"HOW COULD YOU STOP CARING ABOUT LILY?!" Hermione screeched.

And then, it was silent.

" _What?!_ " Severus said in astonishment.

"Nothing." Hermione backtracked. "Ignore that. I just can't believe what your future will be. You were supposed to become _nicer!_ "

"I don't know what happened, Hermione!" Severus shouted.

How could she complain about a person he had not yet become?

"Dumbledore told me-" Hermione began.

"Why is Dumbledore even involved?" Severus asked. "Didn't he randomly disappear after Umbridge was made Headmistress?"

Hermione then frowned. She hadn't even noticed that Dumbledore had reappeared suddenly.

"To be honest, I didn't even realise. I woke up confused that you had been calling your future self 'Professor Snape' in our last conversation, and I immediately thought to ask Dumbledore. The fact he wasn't even supposed to be at the school didn't even run through my head." Hermione admitted. "I've been so caught up with what's going on…"

Hermione then let out a sob.

"What is it?" Severus asked compassionately.

"We're meant to get our OWL results in August. But since Umbridge is in charge, she marked them all early. And you know what? My results were _shit._ I can't work at the Ministry now, not with my grades. And of course, Malfoy got Outstanding in everything!"

Severus was devastated for her. He was about to try and give her words of comfort when she spoke again.

"And now Dumbledore tells me all about Lily…" Hermione immediately stopped talking, like before.

She seemed to be mentioning Lily on repeat accidentally, as though it was permanently on her mind.

"Hermione…" Severus said slowly. "What do you know?"

"Dumbledore said I can't tell you everything. But you have to know that you being a full-time Death-Eater changes everything. Dumbledore can't carry out his plan. You…you need to go back. Or the Wizarding World will be in danger." She croaked, looking down at the grass.

"So that I never meet you?" Severus said. "So that I never fall in love with you?"

Hermione suddenly looked up, with shock evident in her features. Severus took a step closer to her.

"I've fallen in love you, with Hermione Granger." He whispered. "Every single part of you. You've turned me into a better person, a kinder person who now knows how amazing life can be. I don't know what happened because of the kiss- if I went crazy because I wasn't able to see you again and then became a lunatic Death-Eater, but when I go back you won't have to worry about that. You can remember me as Severus Snape, or _Tobias Prince_ , if you prefer. You'll remember me as the boy who's heart you stole. The four months of happiness that you gave me will last in my memory forever, and I am forever grateful and indebted to you."

Severus expected her to be happy at his confession, but instead she looked horrified.

" _No!_ " She yelled. "You can't go! What was I thinking?! _I love you!_ "

"I'm glad to hear it!" Severus laughed, temporarily forgetting the situation he was in and just focusing on Hermione, but she only shook her head in response.

"No, you don't understand! You can't leave me! You're the best thing that's ever happened to me! You made everything better- suddenly I could deal with Umbridge, I could cope with everyone hating me about DA, I could ignore Lavender trying to irritate me all the time. I love you, Severus!" Hermione cried.

Severus couldn't believe his ears. He didn't know that he had meant so much to her. And the fact that she called him by his real name…it brought him close to tears.

"Oh, Hermione…" He whispered sadly.

And then, all of a sudden, Hermione crashed into his arms and kissed him passionately. She kissed him with all the words that she would never be able to say, with all the love she would never be able to express.

Severus eagerly kissed her back, but the thought that their second kiss would also be their last shook him to the core. It wasn't the type of kiss he wanted to give her, the type that would make her breathless. This was the typical _'We will never see each other again'_ kiss that he despised.

Finally, the kiss ended and Hermione looked at her watch.

"We-we have to go." She sobbed, and she started walking up the path.

"Hermione, wait!" Severus cried suddenly.

He had suddenly realised something that would change _everything._

"You don't know what's going to happen after I go back, do you?" He asked her, with deep emotion straining his voice.

"Yes I do!" Hermione chocked. "The next time I see you is when you're thirty-six years old!"

"No, Hermione! If I go back to the moment where I first time-travel, that means I never end up time-travelling. So I never end up meeting you. So you never remember seeing me!"

"What?! I won't remember you?!" Hermione panicked.

"You won't." Severus agreed.

"But I…I'll write it down. On parchment!"

Hermione then took out a few rolls of fresh parchment out of her backpack.

"No, Hermione, don't! Don't do that to yourself! It's better if you don't know. You'll never have to remember what happened."

"Shut up, Severus! You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I _will_ remember it!"

"Hermione, I'm begging you. Don't! I want you to be happy. Please don't write it down, for me? I don't want you to be sad!" Severus protested.

Hermione looked at him with a broken expression on her face.

"Anyway, we need to go!" Severus reminded her, and the two began running back to Dumbledore's office.

Once they got there, Dumbledore dragged Severus in and slammed the door shut in Hermione's face, after telling her to go back to her dormitory.

"But, professor, I want to see him as he goes!" Hermione had pleaded.

"And so you shall." Dumbledore had said. "But I need to have a serious chat with the boy."

And so Hermione was left to wander back to her dormitory, staring at the parchment in her hands in wonder. _Should I?_


	47. Going Back

**Chapter Forty-Seven: Going Back**

* * *

"What on earth drove you to travel twenty years into the future, Severus?" Dumbledore asked angrily, as soon as he shut the door in Hermione's face.

Severus had been shoved into the nearest chair, and was now being interrogated by the newly-appointed Headmaster, (or, re-appointed, rather) Albus Dumbledore. The other tall man, Severus recalled his name being Maurice, left the room on Dumbledore's instructions to find Hermione and bring her back after ten minutes.

"Why do you need to know?" Severus yelled into the old man's face, truly embarrassed.

He didn't even tell Hermione the petty reason for which he started time-travelling, and he was certainly not going to tell Dumbledore.

"I need to know your thoughts!" Dumbledore spat. "I can't send you back with the same mindset, or the same thing will happen! You will still choose her over Lily!"

"Why do you and Hermione keep bringing up Lily? What has she got to do with _anything_?" Severus demanded.

He was sick of everyone bringing her up, and the fact that Hermione knew about her meant that obviously, Dumbledore had told her things. Things that were not for him to tell. How did he even know what had happened between them? If his future self had become a Death-Eater, then he never would have had contact with Dumbledore!

"She had to do with everything!" Dumbledore shouted. "Do not forget, you once loved Lily."

"I never loved her!" Severus protested. "She was the only person who showed me any kindness, so it's only natural I put her on a pedestal!"

"What about Hermione, then?" Dumbledore sneered. "The only _other_ person who showed you kindness, and you've fallen in love with her!"

"Shut up!" Severus bellowed.

He _hated_ Dumbledore. Hated him!

"You have to understand, Severus." Dumbledore's voice lowered significantly and was much less harsher. "I have to change your mind. Otherwise everyone will be in terrible danger."

"What terrible danger?" Severus asked cynically.

No one had even told him what this 'danger' entailed and yet he was expected to go and sacrifice his happiness for it!

"The danger of world domination!" Dumbledore shouted, his voice raising again. "By an evil and wicked man!"

"…Voldemort?" Snape said, even though it wasn't really a question.

"Yes, Voldemort." Dumbledore agreed.

"I know he's planning your murder." Severus confessed. "But taking over the world…is a completely different thing. Besides, I heard in the meeting I time-travelled to that Voldemort fears Draco won't be able to do the job!"

Severus was almost thankful that his future self had actually become a full-time Death-Eater. Now, at least, he would not have to kill Dumbledore instead.

"Well then you know the problem!" Dumbledore argued. " _You_ are supposed to kill me. Of course, the boy fails! But because you aren't a teacher anymore, you can't carry out the deed. So I'll still be alive!"

"Isn't that a good thing?!" Severus almost screamed.

"No!" Dumbledore yelled. "I'm s _upposed_ to die, and I will die of this curse eventually anyway! It's my plan- to defeat Voldemort! There is no other way."

"What is your plan?" Severus asked.

If he was going to time-travel back to his terrible life, Dumbledore would have to at least tell him his plan.

"I cannot tell you."

"So you expect me to just leave based on a plan you won't even tell me about?! You ask for a great deal, Professor!" Severus shouted angrily.

"You cannot know- it won't work if you do." Dumbledore said.

Severus was silent for a moment as he considered a few things.

"Can you at least tell me why it concerns Lily?" He asked quietly.

"I cannot." Dumbledore sighed. "Because it might affect your actions later on and I need you to do everything as it would have normally happened. I would have Obliviated you and sent you back-"

"Don't you dare!" Severus said, furiously.

"I said I _would have._ But I decided against it. You see Severus, as much as you might think me as a cold-hearted man, I do have some pity and compassion. I thought it would be wrong to take away your happiest memories with Hermione, but with my decision comes with complications. Your memories of her might influence your decisions, but they _cannot_. It is imperative you only act on what _you_ think you should do, nothing else. You must make all of your own mistakes for this to work."

"Why can't you just tell me what goes wrong?" Severus demanded.

"Because I have no idea what will happen if I do. But if I ask you to do exactly what you would have done, then at least I will be able to carry out my plan!"

"How do I know I'm doing what I would have done? I'm a different person now!" Severus argued.

"You are not so different. Just remember your past thoughts, and past ambitions. Besides, once I send you back to your old life, I think you shall quickly become the person you once were."

Severus knew what Dumbledore meant, as soon as he was back to being bullied every day by Potter and his gang, his feelings of hatred would soon resurface.

"Okay, I get it. Now can I see Hermione, again?" He asked.

He wanted to have her in his embrace, just one last time.

"We have not yet discussed what you must do! What date was it when you first time-travelled?" Dumbledore asked.

"It was early March, I think. Yes, the first week of March. The 4th, I'm almost certain."

"So you must time-travel back twenty-years, four months and two days. And a couple of hours too." Dumbledore said.

"But what do I do with my time-turner then? And my time-forwarder?" Severus said.

"Well, you can give your _time-forwarder._ " Dumbledore said, slowly, being unaccustomed to the word.

Severus reached around his neck and removed the time-forwarder, before handing it to Dumbledore, who put it in his pocket.

"And you must destroy your time-turner after you get back. So that you don't get tempted to use it."

"Why would I want to go back in time if I wasn't travelling to the future?" Severus asked, puzzled.

"I don't know, Severus." Dumbledore said. "But you never know."

"Alright." Severus said. " _Now_ can I see Hermione?"

"I have one last thing to say." Dumbledore informed him. "You must remember- you loved Lily. She was the most important thing in your life and you would do anything for her. You would protect her at all costs, and protect what she loved. You must remember this."

"But Hermion-" Severus started.

"Yes, you loved her. But you loved Lily more. You knew Lily for many years. You knew Hermione for a couple of months. Do not forget that." Dumbledore warned him.

The door then opened to reveal Professor Mottley and Hermione, who looked as if she was trying not to cry.

"It's time to say goodbye." Mottley said.

* * *

"Severus!" Hermione gasped. "I can't believe you're really going…"

Severus ran up to her to give her a long, farewell hug.

"Thank you, Hermione. Thank you for everything." Severus told her as his voice started to wobble.

"Oh Severus, don't to start to cry. You know I will too." Hermione sobbed.

She then reached into her backpack and got out an envelope, with the words _Severus Snape_ written on it.

"I wrote you a poem." She sniffed. "I wanted to read it out to you but-"

"Thank you." Severus said. "I-I love you."

"I love you." Hermione responded immediately.

"Severus, are you ready?" Dumbledore said suddenly, and Severus could only manage a nod.

Severus then turned to look at Hermione who jumped to hug him tightly.

"Goodbye, Severus." She whispered to his ear.

"Goodbye, Hermione." He replied in broken syllables.

"Farewell, Severus." Dumbledore said, nodding his head to signal Severus' departure.

Severus drew out the time-turner from his neck and twisted it backwards twenty years, four months, two days and five hours. His last memory before the room turned into a blur was of Hermione mouthing the words, _I love you._


	48. An Old Friend?

**Chapter Forty-Eight: An Old Friend?**

* * *

Severus had been right, about landing in the cupboard in the Muggle Studies classroom. It seemed like forever ago when he had once wondered how he was supposed to time-travel to different lessons, if he would appear hidden to his other self, presumably in a cupboard of some sort. There he was now, cramped between weird Muggle objects like rubber ducks and shavers. _Poor Muggles, having to shave off their hair manually._ They couldn't just use the _Hair-Removal_ spell that would just get rid of the hair in an instant. He could faintly hear the lesson go on through the cupboard and through the small crack in the left door he could see what was going on. He could see his past-alternate self writing notes off the board, and could just about see the clock at the end of the classroom. It was 11.47am, so he had thirteen minutes more of being stuck left, before the class was over and the students went to lunch.

 _I already miss Hermione,_ Severus thought miserably. How on earth was he supposed to survive now? Forever hiding from his past-alternate self? He hadn't even realised what he had been agreeing to when Dumbledore ordered him to go back. How had he forgotten that he was going to be in the wrong universe?! He would have to leave Hogwarts and start a new life somewhere else, he realised sadly. To think that he was missing from _his_ reality, that Mulciber and Avery were probably wondering where on earth he was, and that he would never be able to get back made him feel hopeless. He was desperate. And he couldn't believe that this was the reality of time-travelling. Had Dumbledore not realised this himself? That by letting Severus use the time-turner he was setting up to go off to an eternity of hell where he would live in the shadows of an alternate reality? It didn't make any sense.

Severus also realised that, just like Hermione, Dumbledore would have no recollection of the events as he had travelled backwards before the time he had first used the time-forwarder. Dumbledore wouldn't even know what he had just done. Severus had sacrificed his happiness and basically his life for someone who wasn't even aware. But what could he do now? He had no time-forwarder.

Eventually the thirteen minutes passed and class was dismissed. Severus had to wait and extra five minutes for the Muggle Studies professor to leave, as she was not in any rush to get to lunch. Finally, however, eighteen minutes later he was out of the cupboard. He started walking to the door, thinking of a plan to escape Hogwarts as it was the only way he could carry on his life.

Suddenly, he felt someone yank him backwards, into the corner behind the door. A wand was shoved to his throat and an arm coiled around his neck, keeping a firm grip.

"Hello, Severus Snape." Payton said. "Long time no see."


	49. Not Over Yet

**Chapter Forty-Nine: Not Over Yet**

* * *

"Long time no see."

Payton smiled evilly and Severus had no idea how to respond. _What on earth was going on?_

Severus tried to twist his neck away, but Payton pushed the wand into his neck deeper.

"What do you want?" Severus shouted.

What could this man possibly want from him? It was not like he had anything valuable- like money or power. All he had was a shattered heart.

"You are a stupid boy, you know that?" Payton spat at him.

 _Geez, how many times were people going to insult me today? I know I'm not a genius, but still. It hurts my feelings,_ he thought.

"Yeah, actually. I've been told that quite a few times." Severus replied, feeling his eyes water.

 _Don't cry, don't cry. Do anything but cry. You're stronger than this!_ He told himself. But he didn't believe it. He wasn't strong. Today was the worst day of his life. He'd been continuously told he was stupid and that he'd ruined everything; he would never see Hermione again until twenty years and she wouldn't even remember what had happened between them. He would never be able to hold her warm hand, stroke her face or give her a kiss _ever again._ He almost started crying then and there. On top of all that he was stuck in an alternate universe where he would have to live in secret, hiding from his past-alternate self, and now Payton had his wand aimed at him, and he had no idea why. _Damn it, I have a right to cry!_

"No wonder why." Payton told him in disgust. "You are unbelievably thick."

"I _know._ " Severus sobbed, as he started crying. He couldn't stop it now. The tears were flowing freely, and his breath was very uneven.

"Oh, get a hold of yourself." Payton snarled at him. "You're already crying, and I haven't even said anything."

"I-I.. do-don't car-care about wh-what you h-have t-to sa-say." Severus sniffed.

"Oh, you will care once I've told you!" Payton growled, as he tightened his grip on Severus' neck. "Did you _really_ think you'd be able to go into the _Ministry of Magic,_ and steal a time-forwarder _scot-free_?" He was yelling now.

Severus froze. He had realised. Of course Payton had realised; it had been obvious. And now he was going to send Severus to Azkaban for the crime. Stealing wasn't the worst crime, but stealing from the Ministry, and a time-forwarder too, well Severus wasn't surprised if he'd be sent away forever. On top of the fact that the Ministry were supposed to be hiding that they were producing time-forwarders. They would do anything to hide it- including killing someone.

"I didn't steal anything!" Severus protested.

"Oh don't even try!" Payton barked. "You would never be able to convince me that you didn't steal one! And you know why? Because I _wanted_ you to steal one."

Severus stopped crying and stared at Payton. What was he going on about?

"Did you really think you would have succeeded in stealing it if it hadn't been my plan to let you? If I hadn't spent an _extra_ few minutes engraving your name on that stupid time-turner, long enough to let you take one from the _open cabinet?_ Think, Snape!" He shouted.

Severus thought for a second. It had crossed his mind, yes. But he had never dwelled on it. He had been too preoccupied about his future and what it was like, to spend time wondering about how easy it was for him to steal the time-turner.

Slowly, things started to fall in place. Croaker, the Ministry, the time-forwarder. It all made sense.

"You wrote the book." Severus said. It wasn't a question.

"Oh, so you _are_ as clever as they all say! _Well done, Severus!_ " Payton said mockingly. "The boy can actually think! Marvellous."

Severus ignored his hurt feelings. He was in danger right now, and he had to get out. But there were still some questions that were unanswered.

"Why did you write a book about time-forwarders that would put the Ministry in a bad light? You work for the Ministry!" Severus exclaimed.

"Ha!" Payton laughed. "Work for the Ministry? Never! I despise the Ministry. I work _against_ them! The only one I serve is Lord Voldemort."

Severus felt his heart stop in chest. _How?_

"You can't believe it!" Payton sniggered. "But it's true. And soon, I will have completed my mission to ensure that Lord Voldemort will rule the world."

Severus was utterly confused, and scared. He had just left the year 1996, sacrificed his happiness and arguably Hermione's so that the world would be free of Voldemort, and here Payton was telling him that he was about to complete his mission? He was not having that.

He broke free of Payton's grip and aimed his wand at him.

Payton laughed loudly, before yelling " _Incarcerous!",_ pointing his wand atSeverus. The spell produced a large rope that would tie the opponent up.

Severus had managed to run behind a desk in time, so that the rope felt to the floor.

" _Flipendo!"_ Payton shouted, causing the cardboard box filled with Muggle objects to come crashing down behind the desk Severus was crouched out. Once again, Severus had moved just in time. The man was insane!

Gathering up the courage, Severus jumped out from behind the desk and yelled, _"Stupefy!"_

Payton however had seen it coming and, just like Severus had previously, had moved just in time. Severus had slipped on a Hula-Hoop, one of the Muggle items in the box, as a result of casting the spell and had ended up on the floor.

" _Expelliarmus!"_ Payton shouted, before Severus could react. Severus watched in slow-motion as his wand was cast to the other side of the room. Payton walked over to Severus and grabbed him by neck, once again aiming the wand at his throat.

"I don't like to play games, Snape." He spat at him. "Now listen to me very carefully. I'm going to tell you what you're going to do, and you will obey me. Understand?"

Severus nodded quickly, feeling tears in his eyes again. Payton then re-cast the _Incarcerous_ spell that tied Severus to the nearest chair.

"The Ministry don't want people to know about time-turners. They think they're dangerous- and they sure as hell are. That test you had to take is a lot harder than the previous one they made students who applied for time-turners take. When I wrote that book, I wanted to make sure people knew that the Ministry was hiding things from them." Payton said.

"But it's for their own good!" Severus shouted, realising. The Ministry was right- time-turners _were_ dangerous. And they were right to stop people from knowing about them. Croaker was the good guy- and Payton was the evil one.

"Exactly!" Payton laughed. "But when I wrote that book I made you think they were the baddies, didn't I? And it worked." He grinned, evilly. "I said all that stuff about Croaker- anyone reading the book was bound to be on my side. And they didn't even know me!" He smiled, thinking about it. "You might be thinking why I bothered to write that book. You probably think I had a row with Croaker or something. Well, he's a bastard, but that's not the point. I wrote that book and waited for someone to come to the Ministry. They'd be bound to come if they wanted a time-forwarder- ain't no one smart enough to make it themselves. So when they would come, I'd let them steal the time-forwarder and time-turner that they also needed easily. And then I'd watch them. You don't know how happy I was when you took the time-forwarder from the cabinet. I'd been waiting for months, and yet no-one had come. And then you come in; this clueless sixteen-year-old boy- well I was over the moon. I let you take the time-forwarder, and then the fun began. I followed you everywhere- watched what you were planning to do with the time-forwarder. The best part was when I watched your face realise that you'd be stuck in an alternate universe forever."

"Why the hell were you watching me?" Severus exclaimed, embarrassed. "What's your problem?!" Payton must have seen _everything._ Including the kiss. _How dare he,_ Severus thought. That was private. _He must have seen how bad I am at kissing!_ Severus realised, horrified. _Oh, lord._

"I might have also interfered _just a little_ in the lives of your friends, but I just couldn't resist!" Payton chuckled.

"WHAT DID YOU DO?!" Severus screamed.

"Did you ever wonder who outed Dumbledore's Army? Yes, I know all about them now. Each time I eavesdropped on you and dear Hermione's conversations, I became more and more interested. And eventually, the temptation overcame me. I just _had_ to tell my dear friend Umbridge who had started the illegal group!"

"YOU BASTARD!" Severus cried. "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT HERMIONE WENT THROUGH-"

"Oh, the cuts? Oh yes, I saw them. Makes her hand look rather intricate, don't you think?" Payton sneered evilly. "Umbridge told me that she feared the punishment would not be enough for a devilish girl like Hermione Granger. So I suggested that I write her a letter, posing as her friend Harry. Once her she'd realise that even her own friends had turned on her, then she would see the error of her ways!"

"HOW DARE YOU?!" Severus roared.

"And then, when I saw _him._ " Payton continued. "When I saw dear Harry Potter, I wanted to kill him right there and then."

"WHAT'S HE GOT TO DO WITH ANYTHING?!" Severus yelled.

"Oh, you stupid boy. You don't know, do you? Well, you'll find out soon enough. Anyway, when I saw him there, all happy and loved up whilst the Dark Lord was suffering, it made me so angry. He had to suffer too. It wasn't originally part of my plan, but I couldn't help myself. I poisoned his silly girlfriend, Cho Chang."

"YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'VE DONE!" Severus bellowed. "HARRY'S ALMOST SUICIDAL, AND HERMIONE'S LIFE IS RUINED BECAUSE OF HER GRADES. SHE'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO WORK AT THE MINISTRY!"

"Harry's suicidal? Well that's great, maybe I don't need you after all." Payton laughed.

Amidst all of Severus' raging emotions, he realised something that didn't make sense.

"How were you able to get into the Hogwarts grounds to watch me?" He asked.

Payton only gave a smile of pity in response.

"I work at the _Ministry,_ Snape. Once I showed my badge at the gates, Umbridge let me in immediately. All I had to say was that I'd been sent by Cornelius Fudge, and bam! I worked alongside her."

"You've ruined lives…" Severus whispered.

Severus couldn't even comprehend what Payton was saying. It had been him all along! And that meant that technically…it was all his fault. Because he decided to time-travel, Payton started watching him and then started getting involved with everything. Payton killed Cho, which left Harry in a deep depression. Hermione was left broken and she even felt guilty, even though it had nothing to with her. She couldn't complete her exams and ended up failing some of her OWLs. And it was all Severus' fault. He couldn't bear it.

"I don't care, boy! That was just me having a little bit of a fun. But I watched you for a different reason!"

"WHY?!" Severus felt as if he was about to explode.

"I watched you until you became desperate! You see my plan was to let you be, to let you suffer in the alternate universe until you couldn't take it any longer. Until you'd do _anything_ to escape. Then, and then only, would I swoop in and save the day. I'd promise that I would bring you back to your own reality- if you carried out one _little_ favour for me."

"I won't do anything you say!" Severus yelled.

Payton laughed once more. "Oh, yes you will. Or you'll be stuck here forever."

Severus then realised that Payton's plan was flawed- how was he supposed to get him out of the alternate universe? Once you were in it, you were stuck there forever.

"You can't get me out of here!" Severus shouted. "It's impossible."

Payton shook his head, grinning from ear to ear.

"That's where you're wrong. Your time-turner is jinxed."

Severus froze. He _knew_ there was no way all witches and wizards who time-travelled lived like this. His time-turner had been tampered with!

"First of all, normal time-turners can only go a few hours back in time. I gave you my _special_ version that would allow you to go way further back. And second, your time-turner was missing a tiny button. I'm _so_ sorry I forget to include it. I'm quite busy, you see." He joked.

Severus was infuriated. "What button?" He roared angrily.

Payton looked at Severus for a moment and smiled slowly.

"The _'Present'_ button. The one that is included in all time-turners- well except of course your own. The present button allows a witch or wizard to go back to their real universe, after they have travelled to the alternate one. When they press the present button, they return to their own reality at the exact time they had left- so no-one knows they had gone and they can go back to their normal life. It's a shame I didn't include it in your own one actually." Payton said sarcastically.

Severus glared at him.

"So without the present button, you were trapped in the alternate universe. Which you are right now. And will continue to be if you don't do as I say." Payton warned him.

But there was something that Severus didn't understand. Something that didn't make sense. If all time-turners had 'present' buttons, then why hadn't Dumbledore told him?

"You're lying!" Severus screeched. "Dumbledore would have told me!"

Payton paused, and then started laughing hysterically. "Oh how could I forget? Now comes the best part, my dear Severus. I have to say that I am proud to tell you that I, _'stupid, worthless Payton'_ as my wretched mother used to call me, succeeded in controlling Dumbledore, the greatest wizard alive, through the Imperius Curse."

Severus gasped. It _couldn't_ be true…

But it did make sense. Over the last few months Severus had trusted Dumbledore less and less, constantly wondering about why the Headmaster hadn't warned him about being stuck in the wrong universe.

"But why did you bother making him tell me not to be seen by my past-alternate self?" Severus asked.

"Isn't it obvious?" Payton said mockingly. "Even if it doesn't make a difference whether you're seen by your other self or not, it will affect what will happen in the future. If your past alternate self saw you walking around, don't you think he'd want to know what was going on? Hell, he might even try and get a time-forwarder himself. I couldn't risk everything being messed up. No, you were supposed to be kept as hidden as possible so that eventually I could make you do what I want, without your time-travelling having an impact on anything else."

"So everyone who time-travels can just walk around freely? Isn't that dangerous?" Severus protested.

He didn't believe a word Payton was saying. And besides, why would the time-turner transport you to a place where you were hidden from your other self if you could be seen by them anyway?

"Witches and wizards can only time-travel back a few hours! You're the only one who has a time-turner that can do more. And even then, the instructions booklet advises them to not be seen by their other selves, even if it is not disastrous. Nobody knows the consequences there will be if you are seen by your other self. I only advised you as anyone else in the Ministry would have done."

 _Well, he's certainly not like anyone in the Ministry,_ Severus remarked in his head.

"Thank you so much." Severus sneered sarcastically.

"You don't want to get sarcastic with me, Snape. Or you might just never get to your real universe." Payton warned. "Now that I've written the book, and waited long enough until you are desperate, I will now ask you to complete one simple task for me."

"Is this really the only way you could think of to force someone to do something?" Severus muttered. "Couldn't you just use the Imperius Curse, rather than write a book and then wait for someone to read it?"

"Shut up!" Payton bellowed. "I have other reasons! I was making time-turners before I had even gotten interested in serving the Dark Lord. I was part of a team of twenty, who made each time-turner, and cast the _Hour-Reversal_ spell. I did that for six years. But I got bored. I wanted to make an advanced time-turner- that would let you travel as far back as you wanted. But the Ministry wouldn't let me, telling everyone I was mad and dangerous. Croaker threatened to fire me for breaking the Ministry rules, and soon everybody stopped talking to me. I was furious. And I wanted revenge. _They_ were the mad ones- not me! Always sticking to the past- never wanting to go and explore further- it drove me nuts! So I developed the new time-turner on my own. Of course, I kept the present button on those." He paused to laugh. "And then I found out about the Dark Lord. Of his powers, his abilities, his strength. I soon became a Death-Eater after that, knowing that he was meant to rule us all. And then, not long after that, I had discovered the way to cast the _Hour-Speeder_ charm. I quickly made the first time-forwarder, and when the Dark Lord heard of my creation he himself ordered me to travel to the future and report back what I saw. I travelled to the future to twenty years later, to see if the Dark Lord was in power. The Dark Lord then asked me what I saw. He had not wanted to go there himself as he feared for his safety, but told me to go and tell him everything. How was I supposed to tell him that he had been defeated by a one-year-old child? So I lied. I told him that he was in power, and I gave him details that didn't exist. The moment I told him, I knew I'd done something wrong. The Dark Lord believed he would be in power. And twenty years down the line when he would be defeated by a baby on the 31st July 1981, the first person he would come looking for is _me._ I was in mortal danger! So I was desperate to find someone, _anyone_ who would travel to the future and kill the boy. I didn't want to do it as I had no idea of what the consequences would be for me. I couldn't even use the Imperius Curse on someone as I had to also force them to time-travel- and time-travel cannot occur without the witches or wizard's consent. So I had to find someone to do it willingly. And now, here we are. The only way you will escape this alternate universe is if you go to the future and kill the boy, or else you will stay here forever. This way, you go willingly. And by writing the book, I've also ridiculed that bastard Croaker and made everyone suspicious of the Ministry. It all works out." He grinned.

"You're a sadistic piece of shit!" Severus yelled. He was really screwed now! How on earth was he going to get out of this situation?

Now he knew what Harry Potter had to with the whole situation, and consequently how Lily was linked. Her son defeated Voldemort. No wonder Hermione had been shocked when he asked who Harry Potter was the first they met. He was probably known by wizards all over the world.

"And you're the even more sadistic bastard who's gonna finish the job." Payton snarled.

 _No._ Severus thought. _Not this time._ He was sick of being the one everyone dragged about- sick of being called an idiot by Dumbledore, sick of being James Potter's punching bag, sick of being bossed about by Payton. Enough was enough. He was not going to kill Harry Potter. He was going to live in the alternate universe for the rest of his life. If that meant he had to live in the shadows- then so be it. Hermione had taught him how to be kind, and loving and caring. She showed him what compassion was, what love was. She made him a better person. And he was _not_ about to ruin that.

"You can't make me go." Severus said calmly. "I will not kill that baby."

Payton's face contorted in anger; the veins of his neck were very visible. He drew his wand and was about to cast the _Cruciatus_ curse when all of a sudden he paused, his eyes wide.

"Wait a second…I've won. I've already won!" He looked at Severus tied to the chair, helpless. "The Dark Lord will rise again!" He chanted.

Severus started panicking- what did he mean? How had he already won?

"Severus Snape." Payton said. "Severus Snape! My luck is extraordinary. Absolutely extraordinary!"

"What do you mean?" Severus asked, his heart pounding madly.

"When I wrote that book, I expected a random teenager to come to the Ministry and steal a time-forwarder. I had no idea that _Severus Snape_ , would be the one. _Severus Snape,_ who is the very reason why the Dark Lord fell in the first place!"

 _What?_ Snape panicked. Was that what Dumbledore had been saying? About how the fact that when he would kill Dumbledore in the future, it would save the world? And that was why he had to go back?

"I did a fair bit of time-travelling, and I've found out quite a bit, I must say. You killed Dumbledore in 1997. And the Dark Lord assumed that because you had been the one to kill him, you must also be the owner of the Elder Wand. His mistake is why he lost the Battle of Hogwarts. But if Draco Malfoy had succeeded in killing Dumbledore, the Dark Lord would have killed him instead, and he would actually be the correct owner of the Elder Wand. But now you're stuck in the wrong universe- so you will never kill Dumbledore. Malfoy will be killed, the Elder Wand will be the Dark Lord's and he will rule once again!" Payton shouted, gleefully.

Severus couldn't breathe. He was in the exact situation as before; Malfoy was left to kill Dumbledore! But Severus knew that he would never be able to succeed, so the boy would never own the Elder Wand anyway. What was the problem, however, was that Dumbledore would remain alive. And Dumbledore had made it _very_ clear that he could not let that happen. He had time-travelled back to make sure Dumbledore _would_ be killed, damn it! And what had he meant when he said Voldemort would kill Malfoy _instead_? Was he going to be killed by the Dark Lord himself? During this 'battle of Hogwarts'?

And then, all of a sudden, Severus realised that something didn't make sense. He had been stuck in the past-alternate universe the entire time, and hadn't been able to find a way to get out. Every time he time-travelled into the future it affected his future self, for example when he first saw Hermione reading by the lake, his future self then faintly recognised her from somewhere. So each time he time-travelled, it affected his future self as he would recall the event that had just occurred between the two. However, it was not the case that when Severus first time-travelled, his future self would remember everything that was to happen between him and Hermione. If it had, then as soon as Severus met Hermione down by the lake, his future self should have looked at her lovingly and with sadness, instead of with faint recognition, as he would recall their relationship and the kiss and him leaving her as it was going to happen soon afterwards. It would have made sense if that had been the case, as then Severus would understand how his future self had managed to escape the alternate universe. But because his future self was only affected by each event as it happened and not by all the events that were going to happen, how was his future self in the real universe, if he hadn't yet escaped? The event of him escaping hadn't yet affected his future self! So then, who was _'Amused Me_ '? It couldn't be his real future self, as his _real_ future self would still be in the wrong universe- he hadn't yet escaped! Was it his past-alternate self? But how? And if it was his other self, then how did he remember what had happened with Hermione, as it wasn't his memories? It was terribly confusing. And hasn't Payton realised that too? Wasn't he confused when he saw his ' _Amused Me_ ' when he was spying on him? Apparently not.

* * *

 **Unknown**

 _Time-travelling is truly spectacular,_ she thought. _Mysterious, but spectacular._ She had been so worried when she realised she had brought back the alternate Severus Snape. The stupid boy had been too frightened to tell her that he had no idea what she had been going on about the day she took him away from Hogwarts. But she shouldn't have worried. He _became_ the real Severus Snape, after all. And it was sorted, just like that.

Of course she hadn't told him. Stupid Payton. Croaker had been right about threatening to fire him. She wished he had fired him now. But she knew that even if Payton was clever, he wasn't clever enough. He always forgot to think about the small details. It was lucky he hadn't even noticed her interference.

* * *

Severus decided that he would think about it later as right now, he had to escape! He threw himself backwards on the chair, and crashed into the wooden floorboards, just close enough to reach his discarded wand.

" _Stupefy!"_ He yelled, aiming the wand at Payton. He watched as Payton crashed to the floor, unconscious.

Severus then aimed his wand at the robes that tied him tightly to the chair. _"Relashio!"_ He cried, and he then fell off the chair onto the floor, stretching his tight limbs.

The door then flew wide open, and an annoyed Professor McGonagall stormed in. She looked straight at Severus in disbelief.

"Mr Snape? What are you doing in this classroom when you are _supposed_ to be eating your lunch! And why are you making such a racket?" She asked him angrily.

 _How did she not hear us yelling before?_ Severus wondered. And then he realised- Payton had cast a _Silencing_ charm on the whole room, and when Severus had stupefied him, the charm had been broken. So Professor McGonagall had heard him crash to the floor to reach his wand, and him stupefying Payton.

"Uh…" Severus had no idea what to say. Professor McGonagall had not noticed Payton, who lay unmoving on the floor on the other side of the room. She grabbed Severus by his collar and dragged him out of the classroom, slamming the door behind her.

"If I don't see you happily slurping today's pumpkin soup in the Great Hall in two minutes, you'll be in big trouble." She told him, with a stern voice.


	50. Two Envelopes?

**Chapter Fifty: Two Envelopes?**

* * *

Too much. Too much was going on, and Severus couldn't handle it. After Professor McGonagall had told him to go to the Great Hall, he had made the excuse of needing to go to the bathroom. He found himself going to the boy's lavatory as it was closer and the fact that Severus was surprised he was not going to the girl's lavatory instead made him question his entire life.

 _What is wrong with me?_ He sighed as he opened the door to one of the cubicles to go sit and think. But he had more important things to dwell on, that he knew very well.

Firstly, would Payton now leave him alone as he had realised that if he didn't help Severus escape, Voldemort would succeed in taking over the world? Or would he stalk him to make sure he would not try to find a way out?

Severus had been surprised that Payton had only just realised this whilst he was talking to him as, like he said, he had been time-travelling a lot. It seemed that he wasn't the sharpest tool in the box, which Severus realised he could use to his advantage.

Secondly, if _'Amused Me'_ was his alternate past self, then how did they share the same memories of Hermione? And who was the alternate past self that Severus always saw walking around in the alternate universe if he had gone to replace him in the future? Were all his other selves time-travelling too?

Thirdly, would he ever be able to get over Hermione? This answer to this question was the only one Severus was sure about, and the answer was a definitive _no._ He missed her so badly and it had only been a few hours! Severus felt as if the sunshine had been taken from his life and that he would never be happy again. How could he be happy now, when Hermione wasn't with him? It was not fair.

Severus reached into his pocket to find the envelope Hermione had given him, which had a poem written inside. She was so incredibly sweet, writing a poem for him. Even more the reason that he would not be able to get over her. But when Severus pulled out the envelope from his pocket, he found that it read the words _'Read this'_ instead. _That's odd,_ Severus thought. He could've sworn that the envelope bore his name. He quickly opened it up to reveal a short letter that was signed by the name of Dumbledore. _What?! How…_

As Severus read the letter, he realised that Dumbledore must have slipped it inside his pocket. No wonder he hadn't noticed as he had been too preoccupied with fear whilst the old man had been yelling at him. Severus looked back down to the letter to read it once more.

 _Severus Snape, I apologise for having daintily slipped this into your robe pocket without your knowing, but I had a few things I wanted to say._

 _Firstly, and I am well aware I have said this many times, but I must stress the importance of this, do not forget Lily. You loved her. Please, I implore you. Do not forget her._

 _Secondly, time-travelling is a mysterious thing- I do not pretend to know much about it, nor do I claim to comprehend its bewildering nature, but I do know this: time-travelling allows us to see our alternate selves and gives us a chance to see how our lives may have turned out, and what different choices we could have made. But despite all these different alternate selves who seem so different to us- there is one thing that connects us all. The body, the feeling, the touch. These things remain the same in every single version of our alternate selves, even in the same universe._

Severus frowned. What did it all mean? What was Dumbledore trying to say- that he was really the same as his other self who had become a full-time Death-Eater. _Gee, thanks Dumbledore,_ Severus thought.

He then searched his other pocket for the other envelope and was relieved when he pulled it out. Thankfully he saw his name written on the envelope, in Hermione's unusually untidy scrawl. _I thought she had neat handwriting?_ Severus wondered.

Once he started reading the letter, Severus felt as though his heart was about to shatter. Hermione's words were breaking him, as kind as they were. He had to take several deep breaths as he continued reading.

 _I'm not very good at poetry, that you must know._

 _But I'm also very fond of you, more than I'll ever show._

 _Your presence is like the glistening lake in the early hours of the morning,_

 _Absolutely wonderful, and it entrances me without warning!_

 _Do you remember when we watched the sun rise up the sky?_

 _All the while I was secretly hoping that the time wouldn't pass us by._

 _I wished more than anything that I could stay forever in that moment,_

 _The awe in your expression that day was more than a bestowment!_

 _I'd like to thank you for the joy you stir in me each day;_

 _And I want to tell you that you're amazing in every single way._

It was written in perfect cursive, but beneath it Hermione had scribbled a short message, seemingly in a hurry.

 _I'm sorry I couldn't read this to you, but reading it will have to do. I love you. Hermione Granger._

If Severus hadn't felt shattered before, he certainly did now.

* * *

After a few days of confining himself to the lavatory, exiting only to eat and wander for a couple of minutes, Severus had thought of a plan. He was a little apprehensive, however, as so far his plans hadn't gone too well. Like his plan to even travel into the future, for example. But this time, his plan was thoroughly thought out.

He would go to see Dumbledore again. In this universe, the Dumbledore who was completely unaware of what time-travelling had gone on. He would go and ask him if he could have a time-turner as he had some extra lessons he was attending, at the same time. He would take the tests, and then go to the Ministry with Dumbledore. And then he would follow the alternate-universe Payton to the room full of time-turners (and time-forwarders, of course) and he would steal a normal time-turner with the _'Present'_ button so he could return back to his proper universe.

Severus had figured that Payton had gone back to his (and consequently Severus') real universe, which meant that he could go to the Ministry as normal and follow the other Payton, who would be hoping Severus would take a time-forwarder, whilst he took just a few minutes too many in engraving Severus' name on the time-turner. Or perhaps the other Payton was actually the alternate self that wasn't secretly a Death-Eater, and that no time-forwarders actually existed in this alternate universe. But Severus suspected it was not the case. He presumed ninety-nine percent of the different Payton's were all Death-Eaters, in the universes that Voldemort existed in, at least.

And so Severus made his way to the Headmaster's office, and was swiftly granted to enter.

"Mr Snape." Dumbledore nodded as Severus walked in. "How may I be of assistance?"

"Well, you see professor," Severus started. "I'm taking rather a lot of classes this year, that happen to be at the same time. I was wondering if I may apply for a time-turner."

"But of course!" Dumbledore said. "But only because you're one of our best student! We're not usually too lenient on giving them out."

"Thank you." Severus said gratefully.

"Wait a second." Dumbledore frowned. "It's been months since school started. How have you been managing up until now?"

"I haven't." Severus replied. "I've had to go to one-on-one classes with each professor, and it's rather difficult."

"Ah." Dumbledore said.

"So when do I take the tests?" Severus asked eagerly.

He couldn't wait to return back to his real universe. Even if he had still lost Hermione, at least he'd be able to _live_ again.

"I'll call Professor McGonagall immediately, and she will have you take the tests at once. If you pass, you'll get the time-turner sitting in the locked cupboard over there." Dumbledore said, gesturing to the large oak cupboard.

"But don't we have to go to the Ministry?" Severus asked, a bit panicked.

It was imperative that they went. Or he wouldn't be able to go home!

"No, luckily a new batch of them was sent by Myra, who works at the Ministry. We don't have to travel there, Mr Snape."

Severus felt his heart sink. What was he supposed to do now?

"Please, professor, we must go." He pleaded.

Dumbledore regarded his curiously.

"May I enquire why, Mr Snape?"

Severus took a deep breath. He had to tell him; he had to know.

"Because professor…" He started, before recounting the sorrowful tale.


	51. Revisit to the Ministry

**Chapter Fifty-One: Revisit to the Ministry**

* * *

"I must admit you are very amusing, Mr Snape." Dumbledore laughed heartily once Severus had finished telling the story.

Severus had told him mostly everything- from meeting Hermione and falling in love with her, to the run-in with Payton that he had experienced only hours ago. He had recounted practically the entirety of his time-travelling experience, (aside from the whole Voldemort business as he didn't want Dumbledore to know he would become a Death-Eater. He didn't know _what_ Dumbledore would say then!) and Dumbledore thought he was _joking._

"Professor, you have to believe me!" Severus insisted. "We have to go to the Ministry at once!"

Nevertheless, Dumbledore continued laughing and shaking his head as what he thought to be Severus' cry for attention. He knew the boy wasn't much liked, but he didn't think seeking the attention of the headmaster would be something Severus would do instead. But here they were.

"Professor!" Severus shouted angrily. "Please, it's about Lord Voldemort!"

Dumbledore stopped laughing then. Just like when Severus had disappeared into thin air when using the time-forwarder, Dumbledore's laughter ceased its echoing around the chamber walls. Suddenly, it felt awfully quiet.

"What are you saying, boy?" Dumbledore asked petrifyingly calmly.

"I know you think I'm making this all up but I promise you that if you don't help me, the world will be in terrible danger." Severus said, echoing the future Dumbledore's exact words.

"…you just want to go to the Ministry to get a time-turner? But according to your story you already have one." Dumbledore remarked.

"I need to get a _proper_ one, sir." Severus said

After another twenty minutes of intense questioning from Dumbledore, the headmaster agreed to bring Severus to the Ministry, and then sent him off to take the tests. Severus barely noticed his sigh of relief once Professor McGonagall returned to say he had passed. He was one step closer to returning home.

* * *

Severus felt rather strange, walking down the Ministry corridor again. How different he was now to his past self who had walked down to find a time-forwarder. And how different their thoughts were. Before, Severus was only thinking of his future and how great it would be. Now, he was thinking, or knowing rather, of how miserable his future was actually going to be. A future without her.

Once they reached the front desk Severus noticed the same woman with the neat chignon and small rectangular spectacles reading the latest _'Daily Prophet'._ The newspaper read the same headline, **_FIFTEEN MORE MUGGLE-BORN WITCHES AND WIZARDS KILLED AT MUGGLE BAR IN LONDON, "MOST LIKELY YOU-KNOW-WHO'S DOING" SOURCES SAY…'_**. Severus had to keep reminding himself that it was now early March, as his sense of time had been completely thwarted.

"Albus Dumbledore!" The witch exclaimed enthusiastically. "How may I be of help?"

As Dumbledore told the witch about Severus' application for a time-turner, Severus noticed that her name badge read _'Myra'._ So she was the witch who had sent the time-turners. Severus look back up at her to see a confused expression on her face.

"Forgive me if I'm intruding…" She began. "But I believe a new batch of time-turners were sent just a week ago if I'm not mistaken."

"Ah yes." Dumbledore agreed. "But I have a meeting planned with Harold Minchum, and the boy was wondering if you could get his time-turner engraved."

Myra frowned half-a-second, before resuming to her naturally smiley face.

"Of course." She replied, and she then called for Payton, who was currently sitting aside her.

Severus hadn't even noticed Payton was right there, and when he saw him rise and smile, he felt his heart skip a beat. But this was alternate Payton. Who couldn't harm him yet. Everything was going to be okay.

Severus departed from Dumbledore and followed Payton down the corridor to the room with all the time-turners in. The tension was almost unbearable, at least for Severus. Payton was completely oblivious to this, of course.

Once they entered the room Payton presented Severus with a time-turner, and Severus easily noticed it had no ' _Present'_ button. So both the Payton's had the same plan, except this Payton was still in the process of getting Severus trapped in the wrong universe.

 _Poor alternate Payton,_ Severus thought to himself. _He doesn't know that I'm already in the wrong universe. And I'm about to go home._

"I'll just engrave this for you." Payton smiled, and Severus nodded back.

All he needed to do was find the right time-turner. He would just need to look around the room. Whilst Payton had his back to him, Severus began searching each shelf for a proper time-turner. There had to be at least one in here, as where else would he put all the time-turners everyone else in the Ministry had made, that were actually made correctly? He couldn't have got rid of them all!

But what if he had? Severus began to feel that panicky feeling he hated so much. He tried to reason with himself as he walked past each shelf, and at that exact moment Payton turned around.

"You might want to have a look at the glass cabinet, with our newest editions. I'm sure you'll find them very interesting." Payton said, and Severus could obviously tell he was trying to lead him toward the time-forwarders.

But Severus didn't want a time-forwarder. He wanted a proper time-turner, so that he could go back home. He continued walking until he saw a small shelf, that looked rather battered and old. The time-turners on it appeared rusty and unkempt, and to Severus' relief they had the _'Present'_ button! But were they safe to use? And had Payton really tried to get rid of all the proper time-turners? How had he done it without anyone noticing? Surely Myra would've have realised? Unless she was in on it…

Severus decided not to think about it and grabbed the nearest proper time-turner, but of course Payton turned around at the same time.

"What are you doing?" Payton frowned. "Don't touch that!"

"Why not?" Severus asked innocently, as he reached for the _'Present'_ button.

"Expelliarmus!" Payton cried, and the time-turner flew out from Severus' hand and crashed into the floor at the other end of the room.

Severus quickly got out his wand and aimed it to the shelf above Payton so that it would crash on him and buy Severus some time. The sound of time-turners smashing on the floor echoed in the room and Severus was sure someone must have heard. He had to be quick.

"Why you-" Payton yelled as he got up from the floor and pushed the shelf on him. "Everte Statum!"

Severus was thrown backwards into the shelf, and hundreds of time-turners cascaded upon him. But it had been a mistake for Payton to have done that, as now Severus had the proper time-turner right in his grip. He didn't hesitate as he pressed the _'Present'_ button, and he didn't even hear Payton's yell of anguish as he watched Severus disappear from the now chaotic and disordered room.


	52. Back Home

**Chapter Fifty-Two: Back Home**

* * *

The next thing Severus knew was that he was standing back in his dormitory, and when he looked at the clock that hung aside the large double-panelled window, he was relieved to see that it read 7.57pm, the time had left to time-travel for the very first time.

He felt like an alien to his own dormitory, and he looked around in wonder. Was it really his own universe? Was there really only him, and no other version walking about the grounds? He felt a surge of freedom run through his veins and he could hardly comprehend how good it felt to _belong_ in the right world again.

Severus then heard someone climbing of the stairs as the loud creeks resonated through the entire room. Assuming it was Avery who had come back to ask him yet another question about _Veritaserum,_ Severus tried to appear as natural as possible by flopping onto his bed. He scrambled for a misplaced book that happened to be lying around and tried to look as if he was deeply into it. But he needn't have bothered. For the person who came into his room, was himself.

When the door opened to reveal the other Severus, the real Severus felt as if he could faint at any moment. _How?_

The other Severus gasped, and the real Severus then heard the voice of a woman mutter, "What are you gasping about?"

When the woman finally came into the room, Severus recognised her as being Myra, the woman at the Ministry who was in charge of dispatching (and probably manufacturing) time-turners (and time-forwarders, though of course no-one knew _that_ ).

"What are you doing here?!" Severus accused before he could help himself, but Myra did not appear to be the slightest bit offended.

Instead, she just sighed loudly.

"All that effort I went through. And you've managed to get back yourself! Tell me, how did you do it?"

"It's a long story." Severus admitted truthfully. "But why are you bringing _him_ back?"

"I thought he was you." Myra replied. "I only realised I picked up the wrong one once he started talking. He obviously had no idea of anything."

The alternate Severus, who had remained silent up until the present moment now decided to speak up.

"Hey!" He exclaimed. "Don't talk about me as if I'm not here! She just came up to me and said I could return back home, and I just figured anything was better than my _actual_ home so I agreed."

Severus was dumbfounded. Was his alternate self so dismissive about his own life that he would happily follow someone he didn't know, just because he thought he would have a better life?! And to think they were almost the same person!

"That's so stupid!" Severus yelled at him. "You don't know what could've happened…"

"Yeah, well you don't know what I have to deal with!" The other Severus argued.

"Trust me, I do." Severus replied. "We are the same person, you know."

"Which brings me to my next point!" The other Severus then said. "Are you…an alternate version of myself?"

"That," Myra started, "will all be explained soon. For now, however, we need to go on another trip."

"Another trip?" The other Severus sighed.

"Wait!" The real Severus exclaimed. "You can't go yet!"

"Why not?" Myra asked. "If you've managed to get back on your own, then I can bring him back to his proper universe."

"But I have so many questions!" The real Severus complained.

"That don't need answering." Myra replied as she started rummaging through her bag.

But Severus was determined. He wasn't going to let someone ignore him this time. All his life, he had been nothing but a push-over, who let people walk all over them. But not anymore. He knew Dumbledore wanted to be like his old self and make all of his old self's decisions, but surely asking for some answers wasn't going to drastically change the events of time?

"No!" Severus shouted. "Listen to me! You're going to give me some answers-now!"

Myra, who had been barely listening to him then looked up in surprise. It was peculiar. The boy's alternate self was much less bold. She preferred that version of him.

"What do you want to know?" She sighed, deciding to sit down.

The other Severus went to sit down on another bed, unsure of what to do with himself. He looked terribly uncomfortable.

"Well first of all, how do you know all of this? All of my…situation?" Severus asked, not knowing now to phrase it.

"I work at the Ministry, honey." Myra replied nonchalantly.

"So you knew about…Payton's…plan?"

"Of course! I was his best friend! Well, I suppose I am still. I suspect he wants more of a friendship though." Myra said, thinking out loud.

"Oh…" Severus said awkwardly.

Myra cheeks had turned pick as she realised what she had just revealed, and she then cleared her throat uncomfortably.

" _Anyway…_ " She started, with an unnaturally high pitch of voice. "No one likes Payton. Everyone thinks he's a bit mad. And he is, really. He's one of those people that is never satisfied with what they have. Give them bike, and they'll want a car. Give them a car, and they'll want a truck. Give them a truck, and they'll want a train. And give them a train, they'll want an airplane!"

Myra then paused to look at Severus.

"Sorry if you don't understand the analogy, I grew up in the Muggle World, you see. I still can't believe some wizards don't know what airplanes are. You guys know about cars and trains, but not about bikes and trucks and airplanes? So strange! I'm assuming you're a pure-blood?" She asked.

Severus shook his head.

"Half-blood. I grew up in the Muggle World too." He answered shortly.

His childhood was not something he wanted to go on about for days.

"Well good, you understand what I mean. Payton was obsessed with the idea of creating a new and improved time-turner- he had been for decades. Croaker told him again and again that you could only travel back a few hours for a _reason,_ but his words flew completely over Payton's head. When Payton's determined, he'll get anything done. And it didn't help when he became a Death-Eater." Myra shook her head.

"I know about that." Severus said. "So were you on his team?"

"I'm not a Death-Eater." Myra said flatly. "As much as Payton tried to convince me to join them, I refused. But nevertheless, he still let me in on the device he was planning called the _'Time-Forwarder.'_ I knew all about the book- hell, he even read some parts out to me- and when I saw you come to the Ministry for a time-turner, I knew exactly what Payton would do. So I grabbed one of his time-turners and set out to find you to bring you back."

Severus frowned for a moment in confusion, but then realised that she was the _real_ Myra. From his universe. That was why Myra hadn't recognised him when he went to the Ministry for the second time- it was the other Myra!

"So you've got to go back to the other universe to bring _him,_ " Severus looked at his other self, "home. And then you've got to return back to this universe."

"Correct." Myra sighed, getting up.

"I haven't finished!" Severus protested. "Something I don't understand- how was there a future version of myself if I was still stuck in the wrong universe?"

"That future version wasn't really you. It was him." Myra nodded to the other Severus, who seemed frightened at all these revelations.

"This is actually really confusing for me, but luckily for you I can wrap my head around it. Whilst you were stuck in the wrong universe, I was doing exactly this- bringing you, albeit the wrong version of you- to the right universe. So he's the man you saw as your future self."

"But how does he have the same memories as me?!" Severus exclaimed, baffled. "Do you know who Hermione is?"

The other Severus looked alarmed at this question.

"Of course!" He almost shouted. "I love her!"

"See?!" Severus insisted. "How does he know what happened? _I_ experienced it, not him!"

Myra's eyes widened in surprise and she then began pacing around the room. After a few minutes, she stopped abruptly.

"I think…I think he became you." Myra said. "You know that there can only be one version of you who belongs to each universe. This universe is yours, and the alternate universe is his. But when there is no one in a universe…"

"So you mean when I left to go in the other universe, there was no version of me here, in my real universe?" Severus asked.

"Precicely." Myra replied. "So now when I bring, _him,_ he now becomes that version of you, hence why he has your memories."

"But I'm still alive!" Severus exclaimed.

"You belong to your universe, right? So any version of you becomes the version that aligns with that universe."

"So that's why I still saw another version of myself in the past alternate universe?" Sevrus asked.

"Yes, I must have gone to another universe and brought back yet another Severus Snape to the past alternate universe. Or else do you know what would have happened to you, Severus?" Myra questioned him.

"I would have become _him._ The version of Severus Snape that aligns with that universe." Severus gulped.

"Correct." Myra agreed.

"It all makes sense now. So when I kept changing things in the future, the memories of _him_ would change too, like an update or something. Each time I did something, his memories would change. That's why Hermione said Professor Snape was mean at first, then strange, then alright, and then kind! _He_ started to remember Hermione as I went to the future!"

Myra nodded, letting Severus speak his mind.

"I have one last question." Severus admitted.

"Yes?" Myra asked,

"How did you get into the boy's dormitory?"

Myra rolled her eyes.

"I have a badge from the Ministry. I just said I was completing an inspection and they let me right into the school. Then I said I needed to see dormitories, and they didn't even blink an eye!" She laughed.

Severus nodded, and then quietly asked her what she was going to do about the other Severus.

"I'll Obliviate him." She whispered, so _he_ would not hear. "I don't think you want him to have the same memories. And then I'll send him back to his rightful home."

Severus let out a sigh of relief. Everything was going to go back to normal, for better or for worse.


	53. Mixed Feelings

**Chapter Fifty-Three: Mixed Feelings**

* * *

The euphoric feeling Severus experienced once Myra and the other Severus had left was quickly replaced with the feeling of loss. The joyous revelation that now he could _finally_ live normally again didn't matter anymore. He had just lost the love of his life. Was he _really_ living? The sensation in his gut answered, _'no'._

He'd never experienced a feeling like this before. It felt, quite literally, like his heart was being torn apart, shredded from the inside out. All his life he had searched for a true meaning, a true purpose. He'd always thought it had been Lily. But when he had finally experienced the feeling of having a purpose, he had realised that nothing he had ever had with Lily would come close to what he had enjoyed with Hermione. And that was the worst thing. He couldn't have that anymore.

 _At least,_ he thought, _at least I don't have to guilty anymore._ After Payton had revealed to him all that he had done regarding the letters, the telling of DA and Cho's death, Severus couldn't help but blame himself. He was, after all, the reason all of this had if that that wasn't going to happen now, it once had happened- and it had been his fault. That, he would never forget. He would never forget the life leaving Harry's eyes as he walked around the school grounds, zombie-like. He would never forget Hermione's tears as she wept about how she would never be able to work at the Ministry with her OWL results. He could never forgive himself.

Thankfully, before Myra left with a rather confused alternate Severus, she said something to Severus that changed his mind.

" _Before I go," she began, "I just want to tell you, if you don't know already, that you actually saved us all."_

 _Severus frowned._

" _What on Earth do you me-"_

" _Think about. Someone else was bound to come to Payton instead. Even if they hadn't read the darned book, he would still have persuaded them to take the time-forwarder. And I doubt anyone would refuse such a thing. Then they would be trapped in the wrong universe- just like you were- and when Payton would finally come to them and offer his aid, I think you know as well as I do that they'd be desperate and would kill Harry in an instant. Especially since they would have no idea who he is."_

 _Severus was silent as he thought about it. She was just trying to make him feel better…_

" _And then what would have happened? We'd all be in danger. It's a miracle it was you who got your hands on the time-forwarder. You saved us all."_

 _And then Myra and the other Severus were gone, leaving Severus to dwell upon what he had just been told._

He had repeated the conversation in his mind many times, and although he understood what she was saying, he still felt as though he had done wrong. There was nothing 'good' or 'heroic' by being the cause of someone's death. Cho Chang didn't deserve to have once died, even if it wasn't going to happen now anyway.

Severus had only been left to his own thoughts for about half an hour after Myra and the other Severus left until the dormitory door swung open again. This time, it was definitely going to be Avery. And it was.

"You ain't workin'?" Avery asked, with a surprised look on his face. "You always are."

"Well I thought I'd just relax for a bit." Severus replied.

He immediately felt happier now. Avery talking to him made him feel relaxed again. It meant that he truly belonged to the right universe now, and he didn't have to worry about bumping in to any of his other selves.

"It's nearly nine o'clock now. You going to bed?" Avery asked, as he pulled off his shoes. "I am."

"Where's Mucliber?" Severus frowned.

They only had half an hour before everyone had to be in bed. And if you were caught walking around the corridors, especially if you were in Slytherin, you'd be in big trouble.

"Oh he's just talking to Molly…" Avery trailed off.

Severus knew that Mulciber would only talk to Molly if there was no one else to talk to. The girl was obsessed with Mulciber, and the fact he was going along with it meant he probably had an argument with Avery.

"Have you two fallen out?" Severus asked.

"Well, I told him about the Veritaserum but he didn't believe me…"

Severus rolled his eyes. Everything was coming back now, the 'debate' that Avery was having with Mulciber. Evidently, it must not have ended well.

Severus told Avery that Mulciber would probably forget about it tomorrow, and with that knowledge the two boys then went to bed. Severus tried to ignore the incoming thoughts about Hermione, but all in vain. He couldn't help it. Even as he was lying in the comfortable bed in the dormitory, something which he had had to live without as he had slept on the dirty mattress he had stolen in the lavatory for weeks, he felt the loss of her presence aching inside him. The feelings of relief that he was back in the right universe were juxtaposed with the feelings of sorrow and loss of what he regarded to be probably the best few months in his life. But he had to accept it. The fate of the Wizarding World rested upon it.


	54. Old Thoughts

**Chapter Fifty-Four: Old Thoughts**

* * *

 _(Mid-June, 1976)_

Months had passed and now Severus was back into the usual rhythm of his previous life. He had been surprised at how easily he had slipped back into his old routine, and now he couldn't even believe that he had once lived a few months without being relentlessly bullied by Potter. Just the day after he had gotten back, Potter and Black had immediately started to torment him, right after breakfast. At first it had been quite a shock, but something in him, the strong part, took over and now he didn't even think much of it. He used his schoolwork as a coping mechanism for the bullying and for Hermione. Somehow, as strange as it might sound, having another thing hurting him made it easier for Severus to deal with the bullying. When he was punched, he compared it to the blow he felt in his gut each morning when he remembered Hermione would never remember him. When he was kicked, he compared it to the thumping in his mind; the terrible sensation of the headache he felt every time he had lost many hours of sleep crying about her. Now, Potter was nothing. He could _do_ nothing. Severus was already too badly hurt. But that didn't mean he didn't despise Potter. He did.

During the first month, he had spent many hours staring outside the dormitory window, that led onto the lake. He made a special effort of not going there as he knew the pain it would cause him, but it didn't stop him from staring at the sight from afar. Perhaps she was looking at the lake too, in the future. Severus imagined she was sitting against the tree he used to sit at, reading one of her favourite books. Her frizzy golden-brown hair would be flowing in the wind, much to her annoyance, and she would pull on a beanie to try and tame it. But some strands of hair would still manage to escape, and she would let them hit against her face in acceptance. Soon, she'd be so entrapped by the words she was reading that she wouldn't even notice her defiant hair. He imagined her quickly turning the page, ignoring the numbness in her fingers due to the cold, despite the fact it was March. And then he imagined her getting up, and looking up towards him at the window. But by then, Severus would walk away from the window, so he could not imagine seeing her face. He couldn't bear imagining her face. He knew he would start crying if he did.

Sometimes, he found himself wondering what it had been like as a Death-Eater. Sometimes, the idea of becoming one didn't sound too foreign. At least there he could forget about him problems. At least there he was have a purpose. When he remembered Dumbledore's words, telling him to think as his past self would have done, he couldn't help but think this is what Dumbledore meant. After all, his past self wanted to become a Death-Eater too. And besides, this was what he was _supposed_ to do. He knew that he was going to kill Dumbledore eventually. Wasn't becoming a Death-Eater the best means of preparing himself? Lily, of course, did not approve of his obvious interest in being a Death-Eater.

Lily. When he first saw her at breakfast in the Great Hall, after he had returned, he had been bitterly disappointed. He had been blind to it before, but now it was obvious. She had become just like all the others. No wonder she would end up marrying James Potter. She sickened him, but at the same time, there was a part of Severus, the part that had convinced him that he was still in love with her, that was overjoyed. As he watched her from the opposite table, a part of him was thrilled to see his friend again, and even got excited. As much as Severus didn't want to have anything to do with her anymore, he knew that if he was going to behave like his past self would have done, he had to continue to talk to her. And so he had.

During the past few weeks he had continued to talk to her, just like normal. At first he had feared that he might fall into the trap again, and convince himself that he loved her but he couldn't have been more wrong. She was nothing compared to Hermione. And he realised then, although he had suspected it before, that he would never love anyone else. It was just Hermione.

And so there he was, walking out of his _Defence Against The Dark Arts_ exam, which he had spent weeks revising for. It had been extremely comforting, revising for exams. It took his mind to the world of knowledge, the only place where he could seek comfort. When he studied hard, when he filled his mind with so many facts that he feared would make his head almost burst, he felt as if he was closer to Hermione. She was somewhere in the future, studying the same thing. In that aspect, they were almost together. The thought gave Severus some solace.

He continued walking from the Great Hall when he heard the voice of James Potter bellowing down the corridor. Severus experienced some sort of déjà vu, and he quickly realised that he had seen this event happen.

"Oi, Snivellus!"

Severus drew his wand out in an instant, but unfortunately he was not quick enough.

"Expelliarmus!" James Potter sneered.

The next thing Severus knew was that he was choking on bubbles. Potter must have done the _Scourging Charm,_ as Severus' mouth was now frothing with bubbles, and he could hardly breathe. The acrid taste of washing up liquid burnt his tongue, and he could only faintly hear the laughs of people in the background.

"Stop! Stop it!" Someone cried, but Severus didn't know who.

The only thing he was concentrating on at the moment was trying not to choke to death, which was a task in itself. Suddenly, he could breathe again, and he looked up to see Potter glaring at him.

Severus did not even have enough time to scramble for his wand when he felt himself be thrown up into the air. He felt his trousers slip down to his ankles, so that his underwear was on show. His face immediately reddened, and he felt as if he might die of shame. He would rather be choking on bubbles than this. Anything but this.

"Let him down!" Was the next thing he heard, and this time he didn't have to look around to know it was Lily.

It was mind-boggling, as he had seen what was happening to him under a bench, but actually experiencing it was completely different. It was mortifying.

"Ah, come on Evans." James said. "It's only for a laugh!"

"LET HIM DOWN!" Lily screamed at him.

Severus then felt himself crash onto the floor. He quickly grabbed his wand that lay a few metres away.

"You're lucky Evans was here, Snivellus-" James started, but Severus let his rage get the better of him.

"I don't need any help from _her!_ " He yelled angrily.

He hadn't called her _that word,_ as he had made a vow that he would never use it again. But that didn't mean he wasn't going to say _anything._

"Fine." Lily said coolly. "I'd wash your pants if I were you, Snivellus."

She then marched away, much to Severus' shock. She knew very well that his clothes were so dirty because he was _poor._ His pants were grey because of age, not because he hadn't washed them! Why was she deliberately embarrassing him? And how could she have called him _'Snivellus'_ when she knew very well how much it hurt him?

Severus then realised it didn't make a difference whether he would have called her a _Mudblood_ or not. She had already made up her mind about him.


	55. 1991

**Chapter Fifty-Five: 1991**

* * *

 _(September 1_ _st_ _, 1991)_

Severus Snape stood at the narrow window of his rather small office, peering into the dark night's sky. Tonight, Hogwarts would hold its annual Great Feast, which would celebrate the beginning of a new school year. Tonight, _she_ would be there. He could hardly believe it.

Severus went to sit down in his chair, to recall the events of the last fifteen years. The years had not treated him kindly, to say the least. Lily cut off their relationship the day he had yelled at her in front of Potter, and it had broken his already-bruised heart. When he had begged her to reconsider, she only told him that they were meant to go in different paths. He hadn't understood; he hadn't even called her _that word_! But some things in life were just destined to happen, and this was one of such.

The anticipation of her arrival at the school had reduced to him to a shaking mess, even though he was well aware she would have no idea who he was. And she would _never_ know the past between herself and Severus, or the alternate future rather. In some odd way, Severus was relieved. Hermione would go on to live her life happily, never having known about what had occurred. She would feel no heartache or feeling of loss, and could fall in love with anyone as if it were her first time. There would be no Tobias, or Severus.

Severus studied the pattern of the stars in the dark velvet sky as he tried to calm himself, and he thought about his years as a teacher. The very first day he had started to teach, he had promised himself that he would be the kindest teacher possible, as he so desperately did not want to replicate the horrible version he had seen of himself all those many years ago. If it had not been for Hermione, he would have become into a spiteful, bitter man, and he thanked her every day for that. Eventually the time came when he had to make his way to the Great Hall, and though he tried to breathe deeply to relax, his heart beat even faster still.

* * *

He recognised her instantly. The bushy hair and lively eyes could not have been anyone else's. She looked much younger than the image of her in his memory; she was only ten years old, of course. But the shy smile on her face as she greeted a rather hungry red-headed boy instantly made him smile.

"Aren't you going to start eating, Severus?" Professor McGonagall asked him as she picked her fork from the table. "The food looks wonderful."

"Indeed, it does. We must remember to thank the kitchen staff." Severus replied back pleasantly, before he looked back at Hermione.

He watched carefully as her eyebrows rose in amazement as the red-headed boy proceeded to stuff his face with any food that was in his arms' length, and he noted her look of disgust and disapproval. But there was also a hint of amusement in her condescending look, and Severus sighed as he realised that this Hermione was a completely different Hermione. There was no point thinking about the past, in fact their relationship had never even happened. He looked away from her table and began to eat.


	56. Hermione

**Chapter Fifty-Six: Hermione**

* * *

 _(First week of July, 1996)_

When Hermione Granger woke up at approximately six-thirty AM, nothing could contain her excitement. It was the ninth of July. The ninth of July! The day that was written on the piece of paper that she had found at the back of her cupboard drawer as a third year. It read:

' _Whenever you shall read this, make sure to push back this cupboard away from the wall. You will find an envelope with your name on it. Make sure you do not do this until 9_ _th_ _July, 1996. It will all make sense then. HG.'_

She found it rather peculiar that the writer of this note had the same initials as her, but her excitement at what the envelope contained clouded the rest of the thoughts. As quietly as she could, she tip-toed to the cupboard as the rest of her roommates were still sleeping. She slowly pushed the cupboard back, and found that it was actually not too difficult to move. After a few seconds, she saw the corner of a white envelope reveal itself on the floor, and she went to pick it up. She then made sure to push the cupboard back in its place, and went to sit down on her bed.

As she regarded the letter, she thought about the fact that she had actually waited until the ninth of July to read the envelope. She had never liked breaking rules but, being friends with Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, meant that she had broken quite a few of them during her time at Hogwarts. But there was something about the note, about the messy scrawl it was written in that compelled her to actually obey its request. The note did not look as though it had been thoroughly prepared, in fact it was quite the opposite. It looked as though someone had taken five seconds to hurriedly scribble something down. This sparked her interest, and so she had waited until the correct date.

But there was another reason for which she had waited so long. Since around mid-March, she had felt different. She had no idea of what it was, or what had caused it, but she suddenly felt sad and exhausted. It was as if she had a permanent grey cloud over her, making her feel melancholy and unhappy. And, quite frankly, she was tired of it. It was now July, and so she had been dealing with this unknown feeling for months. She hoped that perhaps this letter might bring a few things to light, although she highly doubted it. Still, it did not stop her hoping.

What she found, however, in the envelope, was something she could never have expected. As she read through the numerous pages of almost illegible handwriting, she was shocked to the core and reduced to tears in mere minutes. Her eyes, blurry with tears, then went to re-read the letter:

 _Hermione. It's me. You. But a different You. A You that knows things, things that you would never know. But I'm going to tell you, because you have to know. Something incredible happened. Something that made me weak in my knees and silly in the head. This might make you cry, I'm well aware of how emotional I am, but it's for the best. You have to know._

 _I first met him by the lake, the one I'm sure you read at. He had short messy black hair and beautiful, big black eyes. His skin was very pale, and contrasted so much to his hair and eyes. I was captured at once. You might think me mad, but I knew right there and then that I was going to fall in love with him. You see, there was something in his manner that drew me in, like a fly might get caught up in a spider's web. I know the analogy is cheesy, but it's true. He said his name was Tobias Prince, and you have no idea how many times I said his name in my mind. I thought it suited him well. He told me he liked reading too, but I already knew that. I could tell what sort of person he was. He said he liked Potions, and I knew he was an expert at the subject. Oh, I should have realised then! But I didn't._

 _Then we saw the sunrise together and he said the nicest things. He called me beautiful, and smart. I said he was beautiful too and the way he smiled shyly made me want to hold his hand. So I did._

 _Then I didn't see him for two weeks, and I thought he was the one who told Umbridge about DA. I presume DA has disbanded by now for you, too? Of course he wasn't, but I got so angry at him. He lied to me, about the silliest of things. But then he said he liked me a lot, and I forgot all about being angry about him. He had that effect on me._

 _The next few months were amazing. I found out so much about him, and we would both revise together in the library for our exams. We were so alike. I started holding his hand more, and each time it made me feel warm and jittery. He told me about his parents, and it was obvious he didn't like them. So I tried to make him feel better, although he was the one who did most of the comforting. I was going through a hard time, but that's not important._

 _Then he started being secretive. He said he couldn't tell me things, and when I asked why he would just sigh and keep quiet. It made me so mad, he was supposed to tell me everything. But you know, I'm glad we had that argument. Because then I kissed him and it was the most wonderful thing in the world. You must be rather jealous of me right now, I imagine. This is what makes me sad. I hope you get to experience it too. It felt like…you know when we first did magic when we were seven? Mum and Dad had absolutely no idea what was going on, but we felt magical, being able to move the phone in the air without our hands. Excitement built up in our tummies and we couldn't help but smile. It felt like that, except a hundred times more intense. It was like something ignited within me, and nothing could compare to it. I kissed him, mind you, not the other way round. No, he was much too shy for that._

 _So it was perfect. But quickly, it turned into a nightmare. He told me he wasn't from this time, and that he had time-travelled from the year 1976. I could hardly believe it. Then he said he was actually called Severus Snape, and yes, I can even see the shock in your face. Continue being shocked, because I said I didn't care. I really didn't. I loved him, even if he was from the past. But he couldn't live with me in the future. He had to go back. I won't go into the details, but he's actually going to leave in a few minutes. I'm writing this as he is speaking to Dumbledore, actually. He didn't want me to write this all down, but I did anyway because you have to know. You have to know the best thing that has ever happened to you._

 _And you may be wondering why I wanted to upset you, but I'm hoping you will find Professor Snape and tell him. I'm not naïve enough to believe anything will happen, but I'm sure he would appreciate you telling him the truth. That you love him, still._

 _Hermione._

The letter soon turned damp from her tears.


	57. Love Can't Exist on Paper

**Chapter Fifty-Seven: Love Can't Exist on Paper**

* * *

There was still half an hour before breakfast. Hermione wasted no time in wiping her tear-stained face and quickly pulling on her robes so that she could make her way to the Slytherin Head of House's office, where he would undoubtedly be. When she went to knock at the door, it took a while for him to answer. When he opened the door, however, the pain in his face was evident.

When Hermione saw him standing there, she felt a powerful jolt in her stomach that almost threw her off. She suddenly felt an intense attraction to the man she had always regarded as just her Potion's professor. It was insane, what she was feeling. She could barely speak.

"Yes, Miss Granger?" Professor Snape asked her kindly, and Hermione could see everything in his eyes.

She knew what he was remembering, she knew it all now. But what if he was _just_ remembering? What if he didn't feel the same anymore? And how was she acting as if she had been in love with him for months, all of a sudden? All she had done was read the letter, for Merlin's sake!

"I..I.." Hermione started, but she couldn't continue.

"Are you alright?" He asked her compassionately.

Hermione knew that she must look crazy, as she could feel her heart palpitating madly. She couldn't even control herself. But then, something happened, that she couldn't control. All of a sudden, three words flew from her mouth, and though she could hardly believe that _she_ was saying them, she truly meant them.

"I love you."

The silence that followed was extremely uncomfortable. Professor Snape stared at her incredulously, and Hermione could feel herself growing hotter by the second. The atmosphere was tense, too tense.

"I apologise, Miss Granger. I seemed to have misheard you." Professor Snape said, but Hermione shook her head.

She seemed to have regained her confidence.

"You didn't hear me wrong. I know this is absolutely mad, but I've just read a letter and now I know that I love you."

Professor Snape frowned.

"Now you know you love me!" He repeated in a mocking tone. "Do you hear yourself?"

"I've just read my own words." Hermione said slowly. "And I know everything that happened. What was written on that paper, I can't ignore it!"

"Love can't exist on paper!" Professor Snape shouted angrily. "I told you not to write anything down!"

"But I did!" Hermione yelled back. "I did, Severus, and there's nothing you can do about it!"

When she called him by his first name, she physically saw the strong barrier he had built around himself crumble down. He reddened at her speech, and Hermione knew that she had gotten to him.

"You…you don't even know me." He whispered, defeated.

He slumped down on his chair and shook his head.

"Don't even know me…" He repeated, dazed.

"What I wrote down on that paper." Hermione told him. "I can see it in my mind."

"Nonsense!" Professor Snape sneered. "It didn't happen to you!"

"Yes it did!" Hermione protested. "Tell me about it, so I can know!"

Suddenly, Professor Snape got up from his chair and walked up to Hermione so that he was staring down at her.

"I will not tell you _anything._ " He said in a dangerously low tone. "How _dare_ you come here and remind me of something that you don't even remember!"

"Don't _you_ dare say it's not always on your mind every hour of the day!" Hermione shouted at him.

"You think you're that important?!" Professor Snape spat at her, furiously. "You think you mean that much to me?!"

They were inches away from each other now, both red in the face.

"I know I mean that much to you," Hermione told him, staring into his eyes, "because you mean that much to me."

And before he could respond, Hermione grabbed him by the neck and pushed her lips to his, and the many years since their last kiss dissolved between them. He answered back willingly, as she knew he would, and she felt something ignite in her, just like the letter had said. She didn't know how many minutes passed as they stood there, with each other in their arms. When the kiss finally came to an end, Hermione looked up to see tears in his eyes.

"Not every hour of the day. Not even every minute. Every second. I think of you each second that passes." He whispered to her with a broken voice.

Hermione reached her hand up to wipe the tears from his eyes, but he grabbed her hand in both of his and rested his lips against them. No words were spoken for several minutes until Hermione had to leave for breakfast, and as she left Professor Snape watched her with the same shattered heart he had lived with for twenty years.


	58. Decision

_**Author's note: Omg I am so so so sorry I didn't update for months - I had so many exams and things going on but I am determined to finish this story, with only one more chapter to go! I am so grateful for all of you who have followed and favourited this story, and hope the ending will do the story justice! I'm also sorry if this chapter seems all over the place, as I haven't written this story for almost a year, so I haven't got into the whole flow of things...(but i hope it's not complete crap lol)**_

 _ **Please comment your thoughts as I love reading them, and I hope you enjoy! xx**_

* * *

 **Chapter Fifty-Eight: Decisions**

* * *

Hermione had known turmoil, distress, anxiety and pain, but never like this. She had cried when she received a bad mark on a paper she worked hard on, sobbed when she fought with her two best friends Harry and Ron, wept when she felt homesick due to having not seen her parents for months, but it never felt like _this._ No, _this_ was a new level of pain, an unknown, unexplored part of her emotional capacity that she had never experienced before, that she had never knew was possible to experience, up until now.

It was almost absurd that she couldn't cope with her heartache now, considering all the terror she had felt all year as a result of being in Dumbledore's Army, with the dreadful fear that Umbridge would discover them. And when Umbridge had finally discovered them, the dread she felt when she had successfully managed to trick Umbridge into going deep into the Forbidden Forest was still no where near as strong as what she felt now. Only the death of Sirius a few weeks ago when they had battled the Death Eaters, which had left her in shock still, was strong enough an emotion to be compared to what she felt about Severus. But love proved to be the strongest emotion of all, and for all the distress she had experienced just weeks ago, the letter stashed behind her cupboard for years had provoked the most potent feeling she had even known.

It felt like a million splinters digging into her chest, like thousands of shards of glass had punctured deep inside her soul, so that she couldn't feel anything but sorrow. And yet, a part of her resisted. _This is ridiculous,_ the reasonable part of her brain told her. _All of these emotions as a result of reading a letter? It could be fake for all you know!_ But Hermione knew that the letter was not fake, that she, in another dimension or universe had poured her emotions onto a piece of parchment and intended for this version of herself to read it, and she knew with an affirmation so strong within her very being that she loved Severus Snape, that she couldn't just put an end to all her agony with mere _reasoning_ and _logic._ Her other self had lost Severus, involuntarily, and now she had to win him back. And he loved her too, oh how he loved her too! His passionate kiss upon her lips proved it, and she knew to ignore him now would be to betray no only her other self, but his self in the other universe too.

Recently, when Hermione could no longer cope with the stresses of the Wizarding World, with the threat of Voldemort constantly looming over her and her best friend's shoulder, she would immerse herself in the Muggle world. This was exactly what Hermione did now. She thought back to the Muggle novels she had read in the past, and remembered reading _'Gone With The Wind'_ at thirteen, and feeling such pity and sorrow for Scarlett as she begged and begged for Rhett, who she now realised she loved, not to leave her alone at Tara. Hermione felt like Scarlett now – even if Severus still loved her back, he had wasted years waiting for her, and now he wanted to forget everything.

But she couldn't let him forget it! All those lovely moments they shared next to the lake that was described so beautifully on the roll of parchment, how could they all go to waste? She had to make sure they wouldn't. Not now, when there was so much sorrow in the world. Harry, in a worse state than ever, because the only parental figure he had ever had in his life had been murdered by Bellatrix Lestrange. Voldemort's forces rising, and feeling as though there was no way they could stop it. And now, a heartache Hermione hadn't even know she felt until reading that letter that was hidden behind her cupboard for years, was threatening to ruin her life forever.

Getting up from her bed, she decided to go to him once again. She had evidently lost him once, but she was not going to lose him again.

* * *

 **Severus' POV**

She wrote it down! _She wrote it all down!_ Severus could hardly believe it; he felt at once betrayed _and overjoyed._ Betrayed, because he had specifically told her _not_ to, when they had to part all that time ago. The memory once again resurfaced in his mind.

 _"You don't know what's going to happen after I go back, do you?" He asked her, with deep emotion straining his voice._

 _"Yes I do!" Hermione chocked. "The next time I see you is when you're thirty-six years old!"_

 _"No, Hermione! If I go back to the moment where I first time-travel, that means I never end up time-travelling. So I never end up meeting you. So you never remember seeing me!"_

 _"What?! I won't remember you?!" Hermione panicked._

 _"You won't." Severus agreed._

 _"But I…I'll write it down. On parchment!"_

 _Hermione then took out a few rolls of fresh parchment out of her backpack._

 _"No, Hermione, don't! Don't do that to yourself! It's better if you don't know. You'll never have to remember what happened."_

 _"Shut up, Severus! You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I_ _will_ _remember it!"_

 _"Hermione, I'm begging you. Don't! I want you to be happy. Please don't write it down, for me? I don't want you to be sad!" Severus protested._

And then he had been forced to leave her, never knowing what decision she would finally take. He had always assumed she hadn't, that she'd been too preoccupied to actually sit down and write down all the details of their brief relationship. When he thought of it now from his small little office, an endearing feeling came over him. She _cared_. She had cared so much that she wanted to write it all down. And even though he had told her not to, he couldn't help but be overjoyed that the present Hermione, the one that he had been silently waiting for all these years actually knew what had happened between them.

But what was the point? She was sixteen, and he was thirty-six. She'd fallen in love with the sixteen-year-old version of him, not the one he had grown into. This wasn't some grand age-gap relationship, this was supposed to be _their_ relationship as young lovers – except he wasn't young anymore. It would never work; their love was founded upon the mistake of a time-forwarder, which was never supposed to exist. They were never supposed to meet each other at the same age, the laws of time did not work that way.

And what could he do now? They had acknowledged their feelings for each other, but nothing could ever come from it. He would age into an old man, and she still had a lifetime ahead of her, a youth and experience he couldn't take away, not even with all the love that filled his soul when his eyes fell upon her dear face. He would have to accept the situation, and be content that she even knew that she had once loved him. The memories alone would suffice.

He would fulfil Dumbledore's plan to murder him in order to save the Wizarding World, and then live in hiding from everyone who would now despise him for killing the greatest sorcerer. Hermione, no doubt, would be horrified that he was the one who killed Dumbledore, and then forget about any of the feelings she had for him. And then, he would dutifully follow the role of Voldemort's servant until the time came when Voldemort would be banished forever, at the hands of Harry himself. Severus knew the plan well, and now the only thing to do was to forget about her, despite how impossible the task seemed.

Lily was not his motivation for helping Harry now, Hermione was. Severus remembered the dreadful time when Cho Chang had been poisoned by Payton, leaving Harry utterly depressed. Even though the future was changed so it never happened, Severus would never forget the letter he wrote to Harry, and the emotion he poured into it. He knew Hermione loved Harry, even if just platonically, but he wanted to save Harry for her. The ultimate sacrifice – sacrificing himself and their love for the Harry and the Wizarding World. When he remembered this, a calm sensation fell upon him so soothingly that he barely even noticed the fierce banging on his door.

Instinctively, he rose up and opened the large door, and found none other than Hermione herself, visibly trembling. She looked so scared and vulnerable, but also determined, and Severus knew it would be even more difficult to let her go than he thought.

'I know you probably don't want to see me,' she started, 'but I've got to fix this. I-I…can't go on feeling so empty-'

He let her walk into his office and quietly closed the door behind her, knowing that the following conversation would be a long and difficult one.

'Hermione,' Severus said tenderly, making sure she knew how much he still loved her, 'you don't want this. I know you've read that parchment – I'm still annoyed that you even wrote everything down by the way, even though it wasn't really you-'

'I'm glad I did!' Hermione retorted. 'How could I not write down the best thing that's ever happened to me?'

'It's never going to work out. We're not the same age anymore. I'm not sixteen anymore-'

'I don't care,' she responded stubbornly, 'and I know you probably think I'm so weird for saying that, but if you just knew how I _felt-_ '

'Oh, I know how you feel. I know it all too well. But our age difference isn't the only reason we can't be together. I'm part of…something. Far greater than either of us can possibly imagine.' Severus told her softly.

'Part of something? It's to do with…You-Know-Who isn't it? Dumbledore has something planned and you're part of it?' Hermione asked eagerly, partly relieved that the looming threat of Voldemort wasn't being forgotten, but also partly terrified that Severus had agreed to helping whatever it was that Dumbledore was planning.

'I can't tell you anything, but all it means is that we should forget about what happened between us.'

'Can't tell me anything! _My_ best friend is Voldemort's target, I think I have a right to know what this plan is!' Hermione argued defiantly, temporarily forgetting that the reason she was in Severus' office was to fix their relationship, and not about Harry.

But Voldemort seemed to be the only think Harry thought about these days, so naturally she did too. In fact, she was almost glad for her heartache over Severus, as it distracted her from her ordinary thoughts, and worry for Harry. But now those worries were back, and the talk of a plan without Harry's knowledge was simply ridiculous. Of all people he was the one who should be told!

'Ah, I knew I shouldn't have mentioned anything! But Hermione, please, I cannot tell you. It's too risky, and nothing will work if you tell Harry. I'll have to _Obliviate_ you-'

'Don't you dare! It's bad enough I can't remember any specific moments between us from before, but I won't let you take away my memory now!' Hermione almost shouted, emotion straining her voice.

And at that point, she could bare it no longer, and collapsed in his arms, quietly crying into his shoulder. She mumbled to him that she wanted to be with him, and the ache in her heart thudded even more strongly.

'I can't Hermione, I can't,' Severus told her in a broken voice. 'It would never work…'

She continued crying in his embrace, and though he felt dire anguish and turmoil at the situation, he recognised that they had been in a similar situation before, when Hermione had wept about the times Malfoy had called her _that word_ and Severus had soothed her, just as he did now.

As if reading his mind, Hermione asked him in a small whisper if he could tell her about their relationship, and that it exactly what he did. He told her about the first time he saw her, and how astounded he was by her golden ringlets and inquisitive eyes. He told her about the way she laughed at him when he seemed to have forgotten his own name, and the sparkle in her eyes when she invited him to watch the sunrise at 6am. He recounted to her in detail when he called her beautiful for the first time, and the bossiness he loved in her when she told him what books he _definitely_ needed to read. He described the first time he kissed her, or the first time she kissed him rather, and the whirlwind of emotions that it brought. He told her everything, and when he was finished they were both in tears.

'How can you leave me now?' She demanded him, almost angry at him. 'After you've told me this, how can you throw it all away?!'

Severus couldn't respond for several seconds; he could only gaze into her watery eyes with melancholy filling every fibre in his being. And then he took a deep breath and told her what he knew to be true.

'One day, not too far from now, you'll know I made the right decision.'

Hermione sensed there was more to what he was saying, another layer to his words that she could not yet comprehend. But the way he said it with such sincerity and tenderness made her realise that he had made his decision, and wasn't going to change his mind. So she could only rest her head against his, and savour the moments she had with him before they both had to part from each other, forever.


End file.
